Collection of Science Jokes P2

[jrmichler]

Try a fresh 9V battery on your tongue. Most people kind'a wish they hadn't.

Clearly, I'm not most people because I have done that more than once. It curled my tongue a little, but not much more than that.

On the other hand, at about age 12, a friend reported that he had done a science experiment the previous weekend. The conversation went about as follows:

Him: Hey Jim, I did a science experiment the other day.
Me: Tell me.
Him: I peed over an electric fence.
Me: How did it turn out?
Him: Pretty good, until the pressure started to drop.
Me: Cringe.

He went on to get married and father three kids, so there was no permanent damage.

Does that count as a science joke on the experimenter?

 

[fresh_42]

Try a fresh 9V battery on your tongue. Most people kind'a wish they hadn't.

We once returned from the local pub to our tents at a camping location. Sure, drunk. Very drunk. One of us had to pee and caught an active agricultural fence! The internet says the voltage is between 2,000 and 10,000, recommended 3,000.

9V? Ridiculous.

 

[jbriggs444]

We once returned from the local pub to our tents at a camping location. Sure, drunk. Very drunk. One of us had to pee and caught an active agricultural fence! The internet says the voltage is between 2,000 and 10,000, recommended 3,000.

9V? Ridiculous.

Having been exposed to both, I can say that the level of discomfort is similar. There is a definite training effect with fences as with batteries.

If challenged to pee on a fence, I would definitely want to leverage Plateau-Rayleigh instability.

 

[BillTre]

 

[renormalize]

 

[fresh_42]

and it has to be added: Sell, their arms wide!

 

[Swamp Thing]

Old botanists never die, they just start pushing up the daisies.

 

[jack action]

It is almost poetic:

A Facebook user explained this so elegantly:

Since i is along another dimension, perpendicular to the real plane, the projection of the triangle on the real plane looks like a line so indeed the side is 0

 

[Arjan82]

A Facebook user explained this so elegantly:

Since i is along another dimension, perpendicular to the real plane, the projection of the triangle on the real plane looks like a line so indeed the side is 0

So, I'm not a mathematician, but I don't get this (so not saying it's wrong, I just don't get it ...). First off: the 'real plane', what is that? I know about the real line. And, together with the imaginary line that is a plane, but that's not in $\mathbb{R}^2$ I would guess?

So, if there would be a real plane, the first axis is horizontal and the second at a right angle to the drawing I would say. Then indeed the projection of the triangle (specifically of the hypotenuse) looks like a line. In fact, the projection of the hypotenuse coincides with the horizontal line, with 'real' length 1. But then it does have a real component and I'm having trouble seeing what is 0 about it... The vertical line though, that has indeed length 0 in the projection.

Sorry for possibly way overthinking this...

 

[Orodruin]

It is almost poetic:

View attachment 348779​

A Facebook user explained this so elegantly:

I mean, this is just the deprecated imaginary time description of Minkowski space ...

 

[Ibix]

I don't get this

I think the Facebook user is adding confusion to this, yes. The hypotenuse has "length" zero, but non-zero projections on to both the horizontal and vertical axes.

As Orodruin notes, the diagram is a Minkowski diagram, widely used in relativity as a "map" of a two dimensional spacetime (one time, one space dimension) using the old "imaginary time" approach.

 

[collinsmark]

I just don't get it

As @Orodruin and @Ibix point out, it is a valid form of geometry, albeit non-Euclidean, akin to flat, Minkowski spacetime. However, the facebook user was overthinking it (you can probably ignore the facebook user's comments).

As a special bonus, you can even do "trigonometry"-like operations in such geometries of such right triangles, except instead of using sin(), cos(), and tan(), etc., you can invoke their hyperbolic equivalents, sinh(), cosh(), and tanh(), etc.

 

[gmax137]

I think the Facebook user is adding confusion to this, yes.

Really.

My "poem" would be:
$H^2=A^2+B^2$
$H^2=i^2+1^2$
$H^2=-1+1=0$
$H=0$

 

[Orodruin]

I think the Facebook user is adding confusion to this, yes.

That is so weird though. Random Facebook comments are usually such a fount of indisputable knowledge …

 

[berkeman]

 

[Swamp Thing]

View attachment 348824

"I got to work at 10, then grabbed a latte. Then I headed over to the gym. Then me and a couple of friends went to the salad bar for a quick bite before heading to our cool new Tibetan themed meditation center. Then we had this all-hands townhall zoom meeting..."

 

[fresh_42]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[Bandersnatch]

View attachment 348826

That's cheating. If adding extra elements to aluminium could count as making it transparent, then they wouldn't have to wait until the 22nd century to invent it - they could have just dug up some corundum from the ground.

 

[davenn]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[davenn]

You know, this just doesn't seem like a great idea to me ....

 

[berkeman]

 

[Orodruin]

View attachment 349165

Two things come to mind:

1. The objects in the left picture are ever so slightly bigger than the man in the second.
2. The instrument used for the left picture costs ever so slightly more than that used for the right.

 

[Ibix]

The instrument used for the left picture costs ever so slightly more than that used for the right.

Webb cost the better part of $10bn (I looked it up because I was just about to make a similar comment).

 

[davenn]

 

[davenn]

 

[phinds]

 

[BillTre]

 

[BillTre]

 

[Frabjous]

 

[davenn]

“…when it is least convenient.”

 

[fresh_42]

“…when it is least convenient.”

View attachment 349489

That was definitely one of the better ones! Last automatic update took hours!

 

[fresh_42]

 

[Orodruin]

View attachment 349498

Where is the joke? This is my wife’s last birthday cake:

(Yellow candles were lit when it went ”live”)

 

[Frabjous]

 

[berkeman]

 

[berkeman]

 

[Ibix]

View attachment 349658

A colleague used to edit an internal newsletter with things of professional interest for people in various scientific or numerate roles. Having the kind of sense of humour that would go well on here, he used that pie chart (without the key) as the logo. He was very disappointed to discover that the next editor had changed it to use our corporate standard colour scheme and ruined the joke.

 

[BillTre]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 349681

Apparently wasn't a letter soup.

 

[jack action]

 

[jack action]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[DrGreg]

0 zero
0 zero

(You won't understand my response if you don't have "Consolas" font installed on your device.)

 

[BillTre]

 

[Ibix]

 

[Orodruin]

View attachment 350066

I am sure I posted the following one before, but it is good and deserves repeating:

- Is there a doctor on board?
- Yes! I have a PhD in population statistics.
- This man is having a heart attack! He is dying!
- Well, well … minus one.

 

[berkeman]

 

[dextercioby]