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Math Poem Needed!

  1. Mar 23, 2004 #1
    hey guys, i was just wondering if you could help me make a poem about math, college math, that is.

    i know you guys are very talented at this, and i'm not.

    any theme is okay...

    hope you could really help me guys... :)
  2. jcsd
  3. Mar 23, 2004 #2

    Math Is Hard

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    1) what class is this for?

    2) got any words that rhyme with Pythagoras?
  4. Mar 23, 2004 #3
    Tea-bag torus?

    Flea-bag taurus?
  5. Mar 23, 2004 #4
  6. Mar 23, 2004 #5

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    hmmm.. ok, Zoob, you're right - that's too hard. we should take some liberties with the name pronunciation first

    a brilliant old man named Pye-THAH-garus,
    yada yadda ya yada ya yada ya,
    yada yada ya ya -
    yada yada ya ya,
    Til he popped some prescription Viagaras.

    (the middle part's giving me trouble)
  7. Mar 23, 2004 #6

    Math Is Hard

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    or maybe limericks are the wrong way to go altogether for this project. they just have a tendency to come out naughty.
  8. Mar 23, 2004 #7
    No one could beat W.S. Gilbert at this sort of thing. Do you know the Modern Major Generals song:

    I am very well aquainted, too, with matters mathematical.
    I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical.
    About binomiel theorem I am teaming with alot o' news,
    With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypoteneuse!
  9. Mar 23, 2004 #8
    Yeah, but I just accidently found two more rhymes for Pythagorus:

    Cattaugarus - a county in NY

    Catadromous: living in freshwater and going to the sea to spawn <~eels>
  10. Mar 23, 2004 #9

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    It doesn't get much easier with Leibniz! ;-)
  11. Mar 24, 2004 #10
    Here is a weak attempt:

    In college level Math
    My grades will be taking a bath.

    Algebraically speaking,
    The answers I'm seeking,

    But finding no more than half.
  12. Mar 24, 2004 #11
    Artman, I found this quite inspiring, and it stirred me to take what you offered and develop it further:

    In college level math
    My grades will take a bath.

    Algebraically speaking,
    My grades: they will be reeking.

    In calculus, Newtonian
    My grades will make me moan again.

    Despite statistical luck,
    My grades will surely suck.
  13. Mar 24, 2004 #12
    Going on...

    To try and rise from this defeat,
    I'll carefully select my seat.
    To sit beside the college brain
    Is the goal I seek now to attain.

    Until I'm found, at his answers peaking,
    I'll muddle through by tricks and cheating.
    But if I'm caught I'll be thrown from class
    And wind up on my lazy...Butt.
  14. Mar 24, 2004 #13
  15. Mar 25, 2004 #14
    woohoo!!! thanks guys! now that really is a good poem...it actually tells what i'm currently going through in my math class--failing long test after long test, that is.

    thanks guys for the inspiration :)
  16. Mar 25, 2004 #15


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    Found this when Googling for Tensors:

    http://www.ee.duke.edu/~wrankin/misc/tensor.html [Broken]
    Last edited by a moderator: May 1, 2017
  17. Mar 25, 2004 #16
    That one's quite a masterpiece.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 1, 2017
  18. Mar 25, 2004 #17

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    If you ever need a poem about a physicist for inspiration, this one's quite amazing:

    from http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a1_122.html

    Schroedinger, Erwin! Professor of physics!
    Wrote daring equations! Confounded his critics!
    (Not bad, eh? Don't worry. This part of the verse
    Starts off pretty good, but it gets a lot worse.)
    Win saw that the theory that Newton'd invented
    By Einstein's discov'ries had been badly dented.
    What now? wailed his colleagues. Said Erwin, "Don't panic,
    No grease monkey I, but a quantum mechanic.
    Consider electrons. Now, these teeny articles
    Are sometimes like waves, and then sometimes like particles.
    If that's not confusing, the nuclear dance
    Of electrons and suchlike is governed by chance!
    No sweat, though--my theory permits us to judge
    Where some of 'em is and the rest of 'em was."
    Not everyone bought this. It threatened to wreck
    The comforting linkage of cause and effect.
    E'en Einstein had doubts, and so Schroedinger tried
    To tell him what quantum mechanics implied.
    Said Win to Al, "Brother, suppose we've a cat,
    And inside a tube we have put that cat at--
    Along with a solitaire deck and some Fritos,
    A bottle of Night Train, a couple mosquitoes
    (Or something else rhyming) and, oh, if you got 'em,
    One vial prussic acid, one decaying ottom
    Or atom--whatever--but when it emits,
    A trigger device blasts the vial into bits
    Which snuffs our poor kitty. The odds of this crime
    Are 50 to 50 per hour each time.
    The cylinder's sealed. The hour's passed away. Is
    Our pussy still purring--or pushing up daisies?
    Now, you'd say the cat either lives or it don't
    But quantum mechanics is stubborn and won't.
    Statistically speaking, the cat (goes the joke),
    Is half a cat breathing and half a cat croaked.
    To some this may seem a ridiculous split,
    But quantum mechanics must answer, "Tough @#&!
    We may not know much, but one thing's fo' sho':
    There's things in the cosmos that we cannot know.
    Shine light on electrons--you'll cause them to swerve.
    The act of observing disturbs the observed--
    Which ruins your test. But then if there's no testing
    To see if a particle's moving or resting
    Why try to conjecture? Pure useless endeavor!
    We know probability--certainty, never.'
    The effect of this notion? I very much fear
    'Twill make doubtful all things that were formerly clear.
    Till soon the cat doctors will say in reports,
    "We've just flipped a coin and we've learned he's a corpse."'
    So saith Herr Erwin. Quoth Albert, "You're nuts.
    God doesn't play dice with the universe, putz.
    I'll prove it!" he said, and the Lord knows he tried--
    In vain--until fin'ly he more or less died.
    Win spoke at the funeral: "Listen, dear friends,
    Sweet Al was my buddy. I must make amends.
    Though he doubted my theory, I'll say of this saint:
    Ten-to-one he's in heaven--but five bucks says he ain't."

  19. Mar 25, 2004 #18
    Really cool use of math terminology and concepts.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 1, 2017
  20. Mar 25, 2004 #19
    That one is hysterical!
    I loved the ending especially.
  21. Mar 27, 2004 #20
    Here's a quickie, by me, use it if you want it:

    To graph mathmatic knowledge
    is a simple calculation.
    With addition at the bottom
    further up to integration.

    The line that charts my learning
    isn't straight, as you will see.
    My upward move took quite a curve
    thanks to geometry.

    Then came transcendental functions
    and my upward climb was spent.
    Until I had a breakthrough
    helped by Texas Instrument.

    I took a little tangent
    for a required humanity.
    It was a pain that fried my brain.
    asked pi, I answered "Three?"

    Now I think I'm back on track.
    All sines are in ascession.
    I postulate my learning curve's
    an infinite progression.

    The end
    I don't know is ascession is even a word, but I couldn't think of a -sion word that meant upward movement, give me a little while.
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