- #1
Jimmy Snyder
- 1,127
- 21
I recently became aware of John Baez's crackpot index.
http://math.ucr.edu/home/baez/crackpot.html
What follows is a rough draft of an attempt to score as high as possible on that index. If anyone cares to do so, I would like to see edits to it in order to increase the score.
Rope Theory
I want to introduce you to the greatest physics concept of all time, called ropes. These are pieces of durable hemp from which all the particles of quantum electromechanical universe are created. This concept solves various problems that have arisen in string theory and the standardized model which I need not remind you are only theories. Where these theories fail to tell us why certain particles are electronic while others are not, rope theory, which I have been working on for over a decade now, explains where the electricity goes as we pass from protons to neutrons. For instance, consider the following thought experiment. we resolve an electron with its one unit of electricity and invert its state on the rope. Presto-chango, we get a positron which has anti-electricity. This is why Einstein never endorsed string theory. As he said, physics as we know it is FUNDAMENTALLY misguided.
Although I lack the math ability to write the equations for this theory, which is a paradigm shift comparable to Galileo's discovery of the pendulum, I hope that physicists will abandon their self-serving inquisition against this theory and work out the details. I point out that they laughed at Hoyle too.
One of the problems with string theory is the unbelievably small size of the strings involved. However, ropes are a couple of inches or so, the so-called "Snyder length". Instead of needing galaxy sized particle accelerators to see them, we can use ordinary telescopes.
It is no secret that Feynman in his later years was leaning towards repudiating QED. I'm sure he would have endorsed rope theory against the hidebound reactionaries in the physics community. And if you read between the lines of Einstein's works you will see that he despised relativity theory. I think he probably would have come up with rope theory before I did if he had only lived longer. This is why I have rejected the advice of my psychiatrist to divulge this secret theory, which I obtained from the aliens during my last abduction, to you and you alone. I hope you will not publish it before I give permission for fear that others will try to steal it.
Yours in science,
Jimmy Snyder
http://math.ucr.edu/home/baez/crackpot.html
What follows is a rough draft of an attempt to score as high as possible on that index. If anyone cares to do so, I would like to see edits to it in order to increase the score.
Rope Theory
I want to introduce you to the greatest physics concept of all time, called ropes. These are pieces of durable hemp from which all the particles of quantum electromechanical universe are created. This concept solves various problems that have arisen in string theory and the standardized model which I need not remind you are only theories. Where these theories fail to tell us why certain particles are electronic while others are not, rope theory, which I have been working on for over a decade now, explains where the electricity goes as we pass from protons to neutrons. For instance, consider the following thought experiment. we resolve an electron with its one unit of electricity and invert its state on the rope. Presto-chango, we get a positron which has anti-electricity. This is why Einstein never endorsed string theory. As he said, physics as we know it is FUNDAMENTALLY misguided.
Although I lack the math ability to write the equations for this theory, which is a paradigm shift comparable to Galileo's discovery of the pendulum, I hope that physicists will abandon their self-serving inquisition against this theory and work out the details. I point out that they laughed at Hoyle too.
One of the problems with string theory is the unbelievably small size of the strings involved. However, ropes are a couple of inches or so, the so-called "Snyder length". Instead of needing galaxy sized particle accelerators to see them, we can use ordinary telescopes.
It is no secret that Feynman in his later years was leaning towards repudiating QED. I'm sure he would have endorsed rope theory against the hidebound reactionaries in the physics community. And if you read between the lines of Einstein's works you will see that he despised relativity theory. I think he probably would have come up with rope theory before I did if he had only lived longer. This is why I have rejected the advice of my psychiatrist to divulge this secret theory, which I obtained from the aliens during my last abduction, to you and you alone. I hope you will not publish it before I give permission for fear that others will try to steal it.
Yours in science,
Jimmy Snyder