Things I didn't know about Canada

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In summary, Canadians are irked when we (of the US) refer to ourselves as "American" as though all of America was the US. Canadians are also irked if we refer to Candians as Americans, because that's for people from the US. Canadians are irked when we (of the US) refer to our holidays as "Christmas" and "New Year's." Health care is free but not always available. Canadians are dieing to wait 50 minutes in line outside of best buy to redeem that $5 off deal on the newest ipod. The U.S.-Can. border is (reportedly) the longest unsecured border in the world.
  • #1
EnumaElish
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Canada is derived from Canatta, a Native American word for "home" or "village."

In Montreal airport, ketchup is a controlled substance. (Fries are served with mayonnaise, and they expect you to eat them that way.)

When you show your U.S. passport during pre-flight screening, expect the security officer to loudly announce "well, well, we have Americans here," in a way that is not entirely devoid of affection.

There are French speakers who live outside of Quebec. Reportedly, some have self-esteem problems.

There are a lot of poor people whose livelihoods ultimately (and in some cases permanently) depend on "federal handouts."

They have some really good micro brews, some with relatively high alcohol content.

Health care is free but not always available.

Holiday season is thoroughly confusing -- in addition to "Christmas Eve" and "Christmas Day," there is "day after Christmas," on which day absolutely all businesses are closed.

A huge majority of the people live within a couple of hours' driving distance from the U.S.

The U.S.-Can. border is (reportedly) the longest unsecured border in the world.
 
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  • #2
In Montreal airport, ketchup is a controlled substance. (Fries are served with mayonnaise, and they expect you to eat them that way.) :yuck:

If not ketchup, or tomato sauce as I learned it down under, I'd have to settle on 'Ranch Dressing' - but never mayo.
 
  • #3
Mayo is the original way to eat fries. It tastes just as good as ketchup. Even better is mayo mixed with ketchup (Good as a dip for steak).
 
  • #4
Actually, the Boxing Day (the day after Christmas) is one of the biggest shopping days in most places in Canada.
 
  • #5
I recently learned that Canada has just one road - called the Only Road.

They have cars with square tires.

Instead of horses, Canadian Mounties ride sheep. This was supposedly caused by budget cuts introduced by the new PM.

French Canada thinks they are the better Canada; the best Canada in the land.

Sodomy is illegal in Newfoundland.

Source: South Park Episode 715 - It's Christmas in Canada http://www.planearium2.de/scripts-715.htm
 
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  • #6
imabug said:
Actually, the Boxing Day (the day after Christmas) is one of the biggest shopping days in most places in Canada.

Well sure, of course! What kind of Canadian isn't dieing to wait 50 minutes in line outside of best buy to redeem that $5 off deal on the newest ipod.
 
  • #7
Cyrus said:
Mayo is the original way to eat fries. It tastes just as good as ketchup. Even better is mayo mixed with ketchup (Good as a dip for steak).
You have to have a dip for steak? Heathen!
 
  • #8
Cyrus said:
Mayo is the original way to eat fries. It tastes just as good as ketchup. Even better is mayo mixed with ketchup (Good as a dip for steak).
And it's chips, not fries.

And it's chips go with fish, as in fish and chips! No tomato sauce and no mayo!
 
  • #9
Canadians are irked when we (of the US) refer to ourselves as "American" as though all of America was the US. Canadians are also irked if we refer to Candians as Americans, because that's for people from the US.

I learned this from my Canadian uncle at a recent family reunion [my great-grandad's farm on Rice Lake near Peterborough has been turned into a vast trailer park]. He was talking about the northern attitude of his two sons, my second-cousins, who have taken on a "SuperCanadian" accent that their parents don't have, and wear hockey shirts in the summer that say "This is where we get Canadian," and spend half their time talking "abeout" how horrible everything from the States is, and how they have never been further "south" than Vermont (the only tolerable state, evidently). I'm going to guess that they are ecstatic abeout the recent dollar-for-dollar exchange rate...

In short, they sounded a lot like Americans...
 
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  • #10
Astronuc said:
And it's chips go with fish, as in fish and chips! No tomato sauce and no mayo!
When I was a kid, I lived next to a hot-dog stand across from the only gas station for miles (from the north, anyway) and the Canadians used our little town as a way-station on their summer pilgrimages to Old Orchard Beach. When they ordered fries, they'd usually load them with salt and vinegar.
 
  • #11
So when will the Canadians win the Stanley Cup again? It has been almost 20 years.:rofl:
 
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  • #12
turbo-1 said:
When I was a kid, I lived next to a hot-dog stand across from the only gas station for miles (from the north, anyway) and the Canadians used our little town as a way-station on their summer pilgrimages to Old Orchard Beach. When they ordered fries, they'd usually load them with salt and vinegar.
When I was a kid, we used to get fish and chips and go somewhere for a picnic. Salt was lightly sprinkled on the chips. My brother would lick the salt off the chips - and toss the chips away - onto the ground. :biggrin:
 
  • #13
EnumaElish said:
In Montreal airport, ketchup is a controlled substance. (Fries are served with mayonnaise, and they expect you to eat them that way.)
That's my favorite way to eat them. I invented it, you know.
The U.S.-Can. border is (reportedly) the longest unsecured border in the world.
Not for long if this US House Rep gets her way, the tide of evil Canadians will be stopped!

The construction of a physical barrier along the Canadian border "is very much needed," said Rep. Candice Miller, a Michigan Republican whose district borders southwestern Ontario and parts of Lake Huron.

"Every day smugglers are bringing drugs, people and other contraband across our northern borders, which is met with little or no resistance," Miller said during heated debate Thursday on the legislation. "Terror cells that have been rounded up in Toronto, which is literally only a three-hour drive from my district."

The fence proposal included in this latest border-security bill was almost identical to measures in broader immigration legislation passed almost a year ago by the House. It proposed studying the need for a "physical barrier" along the Canadian border.

http://www.canada.com/reginaleaderpost/news/canada_world/story.html?id=c074ac2b-e76d-4141-801f-8c7fe2434029
 
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  • #14
Rep. Candice Miller said:
". . . Toronto, which is literally only a three-hour drive from my district."
What a nut! :rolleyes: Buffalo, NY is about a 1 hr drive from Toronto - well the way I drive that is. :biggrin: Folks in NY and VT (I imagine NH and ME too, but we don't hear about them here) want to keep the border open, and with minimal hassle for both US and Canadian citizens. We like international trade.
 
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  • #15
EnumaElish said:
Holiday season is thoroughly confusing -- in addition to "Christmas Eve" and "Christmas Day," there is "day after Christmas," on which day absolutely all businesses are closed.
Boxing Day is celebrated in the UK, Australia, New Zealand, South Africa and possibly many other countries as well. People in countries that do not celebrate Boxing Day are, nevertheless, aware of its existence. Those that aren't aware, are still able to absorb the idea that the rest of the world need not follow the same traditions as themselves. I bet it is only the Americans that lose the ability to tie their shoelaces correctly when someone tells them about Boxing Day!
 
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  • #16


Here's a clip from an episode of a popular Canadian TV show in which Americans are interviewed about Canadian current events. This segment features an interview with presidential candidate Mike Huckabee in which he congratulates Canada for "preserving your national igloo". (Canada has a "national igloo" which is a downscale replica of the capitol building in Arkansas. The igloo was in danger of melting due to global warming so an initiative was announced to preserve the building by placing it in a giant dome.)

Other little known facts about Canada which are discussed in this clip include:

Canada recently switched from a 20 hour day to a 24 hour day.

Canada has recently become part of North America.

The King of Canada is Lucienne Bonhomme.
 
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  • #17
Astronuc said:
What a nut! :rolleyes: Buffalo, NY is about a 1 hr drive from Toronto - well the way I drive that is. :biggrin: Folks in NY and VT (I imagine NH and ME too, but we don't here about them) want to keep the border open, and with minimal hassle for both US and Canadian citizens. We like international trade.

I'm sure most of us in Michigan agree with you. Heck, we're practically Canadian anyway with our love of hockey and all that ;)
 
  • #18
Gokul43201 said:
Boxing Day is celebrated in the UK, Australia, New Zealand, South Africa and possibly many other countries as well. People in countries that do not celebrate Boxing Day are, nevertheless, aware of its existence. Those that aren't aware, are still able to absorb the idea that the rest of the world need not follow the same traditions as themselves. I bet it is only the Americans that lose the ability to tie their shoelaces correctly when someone tells them about Boxing Day!

Pretty much any country that has (or has had) Elizabeth II on their coins celebrates boxing day.

And Gokul? Your shoelace comment? Kinda dumn, y'know, coz, like, we have velcro?
 
  • #19
Chi Meson said:
And Gokul? Your shoelace comment? Kinda dumn, y'know, coz, like, we have velcro?
D'oh!

 
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  • #20
Quote:
The U.S.-Can. border is (reportedly) the longest unsecured border in the world.
Qoute 2:
Not for long if this US House Rep gets her way, the tide of evil Canadians will be stopped!

Yeah, well, I may have had some ancestors that uh...crossed the northern line to get here. After going to Canada from Luxembourg, but I'm not sure. You know, kinda keepin' it quite...don't want the INS to come and kick out all of us Goetzingers
 
  • #21
binzing said:
don't want the INS to come and kick out all of us Goetzingers

All of you goat whater's? :bugeye:
 
  • #22
oedipa maas said:
Other little known facts about Canada which are discussed in this clip include:

Canada recently switched from a 20 hour day to a 24 hour day.

Canada has recently become part of North America.

The King of Canada is Lucienne Bonhomme.

During the 2000 election campaign he asked Al Gore if Canada can expect "president" Gore to visit Toronto, the capital of Canada. Mercer manages to talk to all kinds of American politicians.
 
  • #23
Dammit danger! You joined the ranks of many other misspronouncers! The e is silent lol
 
  • #24
I am NOT a Canadian!

 
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  • #25
I'm very thankful for Canada's existence. Without it, there would have been no SCTV.:biggrin:
 
  • #26
I've been a lurker, but I thought this might be a fun point to jump in
& post something.

I talked to pal of mine in Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada last night. I asked what the current temp was. He said it was something like -5(F). Living in San Diego & me telling him aboot suffering 50 degree temps in the evening brought guffaws all the way from the Great White North to Southern California.

If'n I'm going to get hit with a fish, please don't make it as big as these bluegill!

Happy New Year!

6xjasxu.jpg
 
  • #27
Nice Photoshop job, If you made it, play with the shadow effect and it'll look even better.
 
  • #28
Here is one that surprised me when we investigated the requirements to attain Canadian citizenship: You have to pledge allegiance to the Queen of England!
 
  • #29
Canadians drive faster than Americans.

Everytime I go to the States, everyone drives so darn slow especially on the highway.
 
  • #30
That's probably because there's traffic on the roads in America!
 
  • #31
Bix said:
I've been a lurker, but I thought this might be a fun point to jump in
& post something.

I talked to pal of mine in Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada last night. I asked what the current temp was. He said it was something like -5(F). Living in San Diego & me telling him aboot suffering 50 degree temps in the evening brought guffaws all the way from the Great White North to Southern California.

If'n I'm going to get hit with a fish, please don't make it as big as these bluegill!

Happy New Year!

6xjasxu.jpg
Someone killed those beautiful fish? :cry:

<WHAM>

<WHAM>
 
  • #32
I've been to the US but I've always wanted to go to Canada and I really want to go to Montreal Comedy Festival.
 
  • #33
Gokul43201 said:
That's probably because there's traffic on the roads in America!

Then why am I able to go really fast and everyone else can't?

I'm always passing everyone literally. I remember I was just driving with the Americans on the highway thinking this is freaking slow. Then I saw two cars fly by with Ontario plates on them. After that, I was gone off joining my Ontario friends. :smile:
 
  • #34
Gokul43201 said:
Boxing Day is celebrated in the UK, Australia, New Zealand, South Africa and possibly many other countries as well. People in countries that do not celebrate Boxing Day are, nevertheless, aware of its existence. Those that aren't aware, are still able to absorb the idea that the rest of the world need not follow the same traditions as themselves. I bet it is only the Americans that lose the ability to tie their shoelaces correctly when someone tells them about Boxing Day!


I've never been able to tie my shoelaces. I still fail to see any connection to Boxing Day - I'm with -> stupid <- over there (the guy in the Presidential Portrait on the wall) when it comes to understanding jokes...
 
  • #35
Evo said:
Someone killed those beautiful fish? :cry:

<WHAM>

<WHAM>

hmm - tears shed over a Photoshop-ed fisherman's tale. Bluegills are sunfish and a reeeeally big one is maybe 8-10 inches long -- not three feet. The world's record fish is 4lbs 12 oz, about 14 inches long. Probably hatched at the end of the last Ice Age.
 

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