When is the best age to have kids?

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In summary: I'm looking for the "ideal" age.In summary, the conversation revolves around the best age to have children, with the ages of 25 and 28 being debated. Some argue that the ideal age is in the early-to-late 20's, while others believe it is best to wait until later in life, when one is emotionally and financially stable. Factors such as the willingness to change one's lifestyle, financial stability, relationship health, and reasons for wanting children are all mentioned as important considerations. Ultimately, there is no one "best" age to have children, as it depends on individual circumstances and readiness.
  • #36
Kurdt said:
Stemming the increase in population is a good thing. More people should be choosing not to have kids in my opinion. The worlds population can't grow forever. Alas, people are vain.
The problem seems to be that, the people who should not have kids - do, and those who should have kids - don't.
 
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  • #37
I'm pretty sure that was always the case, Astronuc. The catch is that in the past the kids that weren't supposed to be born would find creative ways to remove themselves from the gene pool, like robbing a mafia leader, playing in the street, whatever.

These days that doesn't happen.
 
  • #38
g33kski11z said:
I had my son when I was 21, and honestly, thinking back I would have waited a few years. Maybe 24-25, but its really great being a "younger" dad. I'm now 30, he's 9. We run around the house and yard having nurf {foam dart gun} wars. We both dive over the couch and low crawl down the hall ways.. not to many 40 yr old dads can/will do that...

Each side has its pros/cons.

The other advantage to having them earlier rather than later is that by the time you're middle aged, they're out of the house, just about the time you're far enough ahead in your career to be earning real money and getting good vacation time so you can enjoy the travel you really can't do when lugging kids along. You might miss a few more years of wild partying with the young folks, but so many of your friends will be getting married and having kids by their early to mid-20s that those opportunities dry up pretty quickly anyway.
 
  • #39
g33kski11z said:
I had my son when I was 21, and honestly, thinking back I would have waited a few years. Maybe 24-25, but its really great being a "younger" dad. I'm now 30, he's 9. We run around the house and yard having nurf {foam dart gun} wars. We both dive over the couch and low crawl down the hall ways.. not to many 40 yr old dads can/will do that...

Each side has its pros/cons.
I'm 50, and my son is nearly 17. He and I are not allowed to dive on the couch. We have to go outside to play like that. Besides, one of his leaps a few years ago broke the one of the pieces of the frame. :uhh:

Besides, it's pretty hard to break the ground - well unintentionally. To garden, one has to break a certain amount of ground.

This summer, I hope to get out on the river with my son, assuming I can pry him away long enough from the internet and video games.
 
  • #40
Kurdt said:
Stemming the increase in population is a good thing. More people should be choosing not to have kids in my opinion. The worlds population can't grow forever. Alas, people are vain.

You have to be careful. Indians and Chinese need to stop having children. People like the US and Europe need more children. You have to look at the population pyramid to see if its inverted or not.
 
  • #41
Cyrus said:
You have to be careful. Indians and Chinese need to stop having children. People like the US and Europe need more children. You have to look at the population pyramid to see if its inverted or not.

What a racist remark.
 
  • #42
I don't think it is racist. Tactless, maybe, but that's Cyrus. Truth is, in most of China, and throughout the subcontinent of India, the stress of overpopulation is a severe problem. China has long been trying to control their population by enforcing a one-child per couple law. A byproduct of that (and this is from a page on THE INTERNET, so it must be true) is a large export of unwanted female babies to the US.
 
  • #43
Chi Meson said:
I don't think it is racist. Tactless, maybe, but that's Cyrus. Truth is, in most of China, and throughout the subcontinent of India, the stress of overpopulation is a severe problem. China has long been trying to control their population by enforcing a one-child per couple law. A byproduct of that (and this is from a page on THE INTERNET, so it must be true) is a large export of unwanted female babies to the US.

They have a billion people, pollution, and a rising middle class. A ecological disaster waiting to happen. They need to control their poplution, to the point of forced abortions if necessary.

The world can't support the number of people we have today if they all went from 3rd world status to 1st world. I'd rather have 300 million rich, smart chinese, than 1 billion poor, polluted, and sick chinese.


I don't see how that is tactless. It might be because I don't care though. heh...:smile:
 
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  • #44
Astronuc said:
I'm 50, and my son is nearly 17. He and I are not allowed to dive on the couch. We have to go outside to play like that. Besides, one of his leaps a few years ago broke the one of the pieces of the frame. :uhh:

Besides, it's pretty hard to break the ground - well unintentionally. To garden, one has to break a certain amount of ground.

This summer, I hope to get out on the river with my son, assuming I can pry him away long enough from the internet and video games.

Do not break the river. You will be in sooo much trouble.
 
  • #45
Another advantage to having them early that no one's mentioned: you get to spend more time with them, and possibly your grandchildren as well.
 
  • #46
( I had my one wonderfull daughter at age 24 - too early from the perspective of 53. :)

Heinlein said it best for me.

"No man is an island — " Much as we may feel and act as Individuals, our race is — a single organism, always growing and branching — which must be pruned regularly to be healthy.
This necessity need not be argued; anyone with eyes can see that any organism which grows without limit always dies in its own poisons. The only rational question is whether pruning is best done before or after birth."
 
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  • #47
Astronuc said:
The problem seems to be that, the people who should not have kids - do, and those who should have kids - don't.

What do you mean? Smart people don't have kids and dumb people do?

I agree with Kurdt's answer. You don't want to be around for the 15-25 decade of your kids' lives. If I didn't love 'em so much, I would have killed each and every one of them for at least one really stupid stunt.
 
  • #48
25 years old.
 
  • #49
undrcvrbro said:
Me and my girlfriend have been having this ongoing debate, and I'd like to see what others think is the best age. When I say "best age" I mean the age where you are old enough to be financially stable and responsible, yet young enough that you're not quite over the hill.

I say 28, she says 25 . I know it's only a three year difference, but there's a lot of change going on in those three years. Someone please assure me that 25 is too young!

25 is a great age to have children - after 30 your risk of having a child with genetic defects increases ; it increases throughout the age span yet I would not recommend having kids at an age above 40 - if you're going to bring a human being into the world make certain that he or she is at least going to have the better genetic assets and that's why the early the better.
 
  • #50
DaveC426913 said:
Do not break the river. You will be in sooo much trouble.
Breaking the wind is a bad one , too! :uhh: That wasn't me! It was the dog. o:)
 
  • #51
g33kski11z said:
I had my son when I was 21, and honestly, thinking back I would have waited a few years. Maybe 24-25, but its really great being a "younger" dad. I'm now 30, he's 9.

As others have said, have kids young so that you can have a life afterwards.

We run around the house and yard having nurf {foam dart gun} wars. We both dive over the couch and low crawl down the hall ways.. not to many 40 yr old dads can/will do that..

This 40+ dad will do this once my daughter is old enough to do it also.
 
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  • #52
GCT said:
25 is a great age to have children - after 30 your risk of having a child with genetic defects increases ; it increases throughout the age span yet I would not recommend having kids at an age above 40 - if you're going to bring a human being into the world make certain that he or she is at least going to have the better genetic assets and that's why the early the better.

Genetic abnormalities aren't the only problem associated with children born to older women. If a woman waits too long, she may not be able to get pregnant at all.

...stories in the media may lead you to believe that you can delay
getting pregnant and then use assisted reproductive technologies (ART) to get
pregnant when you’re ready. However, age affects the success rates of infertility
treatments as well as your natural ability to get pregnant. For example, if you are
a healthy 30-year-old woman, you have about a 20% chance per month to get
pregnant. By age 40, however, your chance is only about 5% per month. In many
cases, these percentages are true for natural conception as well as conception
using ART.

http://www.asrm.org/Patients/patientbooklets/agefertility.pdf
 
  • #53
Man 35, woman, 25.
 
  • #54
I was 29 & 32 when I had mine. My mother had my youngest sister when she was 42, I had an Aunt that had a child at 53. All normal. But you do definitely run risks the older you get.

Just don't think to yourself, I'm 28 so I *need* to have a child now. If things aren't going well in your relationship, or in your life in general, having a child is probably a bad decision. No one "needs" to have a child. I was planning to be childless, and would have been perfectly happy without children.
 
  • #55
GCT said:
25 is a great age to have children - after 30 your risk of having a child with genetic defects increases
The 30's are a perfectly good time to have kids. The increase is negligible.
 
  • #56
All in all there should be some respect to the child that is being born when having one as many have mentioned here whether its with regard to financial situations or age - many a times however baby's are being "popped" out - human beings are going to be born into unfortunate situations such as the slums and a lot of them are going to have genetic abnormalities of some sort.
 
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  • #57
Cyrus said:
Man 35, woman, 25.

And Cyrus has spoken!

I don't see how that is tactless.
Because you, without tact, cannot detect the lack of tact.

And that's a fact, Jack. But the world needs those who "call 'em as they see 'em." And then the world needs us to say, "Oh that's just Cyrus, you got to get used to him."
 
  • #58
Cyrus said:
I don't want kids until I am 35+.


25 its nuts, 28 is nuts. I'll pass on that one.

i totally agree
 
  • #59
Evo said:
...and would have been perfectly happy without children.

Really? I might have thought the same ..oh.. 30 years ago. Now I know that I was wrong then, especially when I look ahead to even an older generation.
 
  • #60
GCT said:
25 is a great age to have children - after 30 your risk of having a child with genetic defects increases ; it increases throughout the age span yet I would not recommend having kids at an age above 40 - if you're going to bring a human being into the world make certain that he or she is at least going to have the better genetic assets and that's why the early the better.

My mother was 40 and my father was 48 when I was born.

My siblings say that this explains a lot.
 
  • #61
BobG said:
What do you mean? Smart people don't have kids and dumb people do?
That applies in some cases. I was reflecting about that and about what I see everyday. I work near Social Security and the local government offices, so we see lots of folks who receive public assistance. They have one, two, three . . . kids, and in many cases the mother is single. I've seen several cases of sinlge mothers and multiple fathers. Those mothers ought not to be having children - especially when they expect the state (taxpayer/society) to pick up the bill! But then - no one needs have a license to have kids. I also have to wonder about the fathers I see who apparently are unemployed, based on the fact that I see them on the street so obviously they are not working.

My wife and daughter are helping a friend look after twins in the foster care system. The twins are daughter and son of a now 19 year girl, who got pregnant at 16 (effectively dropped out in 8th grade), had the kids a 17 and lost them because of neglect - she went out and got high, rather than work and raise her kids. She recently got ejected from a local bar and topped it off by getting arrested for assaulting a police officer (she has anger management issues :rolleyes: ). Now multiply her case by several hundred thousand.

How many of the 6 million Americans in the criminal justice system have produced kids? That's part of the population I see everyday on my lunchtime walks, when I run errands, or when I go to and from work.
 
  • #62
Evo said:
No one "needs" to have a child. I was planning to be childless, and would have been perfectly happy without children.

But does having a child increase your happiness?

How did you end up having children then?
 
  • #63
28 i rekon is about right, depends on your situation i guess
 
<h2>1. When is the best age to have kids?</h2><p>The best age to have kids is a personal decision and can vary for each individual. However, biologically, women are most fertile in their 20s and early 30s. After age 35, the chances of getting pregnant decrease and the risk of complications during pregnancy and childbirth increases. It is important to consider factors such as physical and emotional readiness, financial stability, and support system when deciding on the best age to have kids.</p><h2>2. Is it better to have kids earlier or later in life?</h2><p>Again, this is a personal decision and there is no right or wrong answer. Some people may prefer to have kids earlier in life to have more energy and time to raise them, while others may choose to have kids later in life after establishing their career and financial stability. It is important to consider your own priorities and circumstances when making this decision.</p><h2>3. Are there any risks associated with having kids at an older age?</h2><p>Yes, there are some risks associated with having kids at an older age. Women over the age of 35 have a higher risk of pregnancy complications such as gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, and preterm birth. There is also an increased risk of genetic abnormalities in the baby, such as Down syndrome. It is important to discuss these risks with your doctor and make an informed decision.</p><h2>4. Can men also have a "biological clock" when it comes to having kids?</h2><p>Yes, men can also experience a decline in fertility as they age. However, this decline is not as significant as it is for women. Men can continue to produce sperm throughout their lifetime, but the quality and quantity of sperm may decrease with age. This can increase the risk of genetic abnormalities in the baby and may also make it harder to conceive.</p><h2>5. What are some advantages of having kids later in life?</h2><p>Having kids later in life can have some advantages, such as being more financially stable and having a better understanding of yourself and your priorities. Older parents may also have more life experience and wisdom to pass on to their children. Additionally, having kids later in life can also give parents more time to travel, pursue their interests, and establish their careers before having the responsibility of raising children.</p>

1. When is the best age to have kids?

The best age to have kids is a personal decision and can vary for each individual. However, biologically, women are most fertile in their 20s and early 30s. After age 35, the chances of getting pregnant decrease and the risk of complications during pregnancy and childbirth increases. It is important to consider factors such as physical and emotional readiness, financial stability, and support system when deciding on the best age to have kids.

2. Is it better to have kids earlier or later in life?

Again, this is a personal decision and there is no right or wrong answer. Some people may prefer to have kids earlier in life to have more energy and time to raise them, while others may choose to have kids later in life after establishing their career and financial stability. It is important to consider your own priorities and circumstances when making this decision.

3. Are there any risks associated with having kids at an older age?

Yes, there are some risks associated with having kids at an older age. Women over the age of 35 have a higher risk of pregnancy complications such as gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, and preterm birth. There is also an increased risk of genetic abnormalities in the baby, such as Down syndrome. It is important to discuss these risks with your doctor and make an informed decision.

4. Can men also have a "biological clock" when it comes to having kids?

Yes, men can also experience a decline in fertility as they age. However, this decline is not as significant as it is for women. Men can continue to produce sperm throughout their lifetime, but the quality and quantity of sperm may decrease with age. This can increase the risk of genetic abnormalities in the baby and may also make it harder to conceive.

5. What are some advantages of having kids later in life?

Having kids later in life can have some advantages, such as being more financially stable and having a better understanding of yourself and your priorities. Older parents may also have more life experience and wisdom to pass on to their children. Additionally, having kids later in life can also give parents more time to travel, pursue their interests, and establish their careers before having the responsibility of raising children.

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