Collection of Lame Jokes

[jtbell]

Who's got nostalgia for Y2K?

Of course, nobody on the Internet knew he was a dog until the book outed him!

 

[DaveC426913]

Who's got nostalgia for Y2K?

View attachment 366960

Of course, nobody on the Internet knew he was a dog until the book outed him!

And no one knew toilet paper was going to run until 2020...

 

[sbrothy]

Who's got nostalgia for Y2K?

View attachment 366960

Of course, nobody on the Internet knew he was a dog until the book outed him!

I know (or at least strongly suspect) that Y2K problems isn't the real issue here. Nevertheless, I remember being issued with a bunch of paper, the thickness of several telephones books (anyone know what a telephone book is anymore?), with C code, in small font on both pages, being asked if I would please use my free time to scan through it and see if there should be any problems.

I mean why on paper? And my free time?!

I'm glad I'm retired.

 

[WWGD]

I know (or at least strongly suspect) that Y2K problems isn't the real issue here. Nevertheless, I remember being issued with a bunch of paper, the thickness of several telephones books (anyone know what a telephone book is anymore?), with C code, in small font on both pages, being asked if I would please use my free time to scan through it and see if there should be any problems.

I mean why on paper? And my free time?!

I'm glad I'm retired.

You scanned toilet paper?

 

[sbrothy]

You scanned toilet paper?

It might as well have been.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

It might as well have been.

I just used the same solution for Y2K, that we used for Y1K.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

The moon landing conspiracies are back again thanks to Kim Kardashian.

Pure lunacy!

 

[fresh_42]

I just used the same solution for Y2K, that we used for Y1K.

The Euro was introduced in 1998 here. That meant a lot of examination of very, very old mainframe code in banking software, esp. as notations were swapped from the price of one dollar to the price of one euro. Checking the Y2K problem was a byproduct. I had never imagined seeing real-life assembler code before, but I did. At least it gave me the rare opportunity to watch Sylvester fireworks at the 21st level over the town.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

The Euro was introduced in 1998 here. That meant a lot of examination of very, very old mainframe code in banking software, esp. as notations were swapped from the price of one dollar to the price of one euro. Checking the Y2K problem was a byproduct. I had never imagined seeing real-life assembler code before, but I did. At least it gave me the rare opportunity to watch Sylvester fireworks at the 21st level over the town.

Only announced much later, we did have a Y2K related national defense system fail

This is from Google AI, but I remember when this information was released, which is how I knew to look it up.

One significant US defensive system experienced a failure shortly after midnight UTC on January 1, 2000 (which was still Dec 31st, 1999, in the US time zones). A ground-based computer failure temporarily blinded several US spy satellites.

The system, an intelligence processing station at Fort Belvoir, Virginia, went offline for two to three hours. The problem wasn't with the satellites themselves, which remained under control, but with the ground station's ability to process the incoming information due to a Y2K-related error in a software patch.

 

[WWGD]

I just used the same solution for Y2K, that we used for Y1K.

How about Y2038?

 

[WWGD]

Wonder why we don't have unisex stores where you can walk around in your underwear to try clothes on, so you don't have to repeatedly dress and undress when buying clothes?

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Wonder why we don't have unisex stores where you can walk around in your underwear to try clothes on, so you don't have to repeatedly dress and undress when buying clothes?

Because the men would never leave?

 

[Ivan Seeking]

How about Y2038?

We are supposed to keep that a secret, so Colossus fails after taking over the world.

 

[WWGD]

Because the men would never leave?

I barely want to go buy clothes at all. I don't see myself wanting to stay in longer than necessary.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

I barely want to go buy clothes at all. I don't see myself wanting to stay in longer than necessary.

With a bunch of women walking around in their underwear? The young guys would sit and never stand up!

 

[WWGD]

With a bunch of women walking around in their underwear? The young guys would never even stand u Maybe I misused the term 'Unisex'. I meant one exclusively for women and another exclusively for men.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

I like the other option better.

 

[fresh_42]

I like the other option better.

Think about it again! A nude beach isn't half as exciting as it sounds.

 

[DaveC426913]

Maybe I misused the term 'Unisex'. I meant one exclusively for women and another exclusively for men.

WWGD has a point.

Unisex actually means 'single sex'.

We've always misused it to mean sex-agnostic or omni-sex.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

WWGD has a point.

Unisex actually means 'single sex'.

We've always misused it to mean sex-agnostic or omni-sex.

unisex
adjective
intended for use by both males and females:
unisex clothes
a unisex hairdresser's

wiki
The term 'unisex' was coined in the 1960s and was used fairly informally. The combining prefix uni- is from Latin unus, meaning one or single. However, 'unisex' seems to have been influenced by words such as united and universal, in which uni- takes the related sense shared. Unisex then means shared by sexes.<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unisex#cite_note-3"><span>[</span>3<span>]</span></a>

 

[Ivan Seeking]

So to be clear: the prefix "uni" means shared and not shared.

 

[gmax137]

Somehow I knew what @WWGD meant by unisex, even if it conflicts with the word's definition.

 

[Ibix]

I was too young to see the film Troy when it came out, so I built myself a giant wooden adult.

(Adapted from a joke by Milton Jones.)

 

[sbrothy]

The moon landing conspiracies are back again thanks to Kim Kardashian.

Pure lunacy!

Ask her to explain the number mirrors up there then:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_retroreflectors_on_the_Moon

I mean you can't just randomly dump them. They have to be directed back at earth for the reflection to work.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Ask her to explain the number mirrors up there then:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_retroreflectors_on_the_Moon

I mean you can't just randomly dump them. They have to be directed back at earth for the reflection to work.

I will the next time I see her.

Her defense for this claim is to check tik tok.

 

[WWGD]

Age is an issue of mind over matter: If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

 

[berkeman]

 

[sbrothy]

I will the next time I see her.

Her defense for this claim is to check tik tok.

OK. Then it's a battle we can't win!

Against tik tok anyone is defenseless.

 

[symbolipoint]

What DaveC426913 says is much more logical. But do we have a prefix with combining meaning for "Either or all classifications..." ?

 

[DaveC426913]

What DaveC426913 says is much more logical. But do we have a prefix with combining meaning for "Either or all classifications..." ?

omni-

 

[symbolipoint]

omni-

The next time we come up to a door with one of those symbols on it or it says "unisex", we should ask a clerk, "Which one?"

 

[WWGD]

The next time we come up to a door with one of those symbols on it or it says "unisex", we should ask a clerk, "Which one?"

In Halloween? The witch one.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

The next time we come up to a door with one of those symbols on it or it says "unisex", we should ask a clerk, "Which one?"

Ask if it's binary or analog.

 

[DaveC426913]

Ask if it's binary or analog.

Is that the new terminology?

"I'm not binary; I'm analog."

 

[fresh_42]

Ask if it's binary or analog.

The Italians have to distinguish between binario and binaria, depending on the gender of the person.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Is that the new terminology?

"I'm not binary; I'm analog."

Once you've been married long enough, they are called resistors.

 

[davenn]

 

[davenn]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 367011

Definitely a candidate to study mathematics!

 

[WWGD]

Poster at a suspicious Computer Repair place. "I'd rather be phishing."

 

[BillTre]

 

[sbrothy]

Once you've been married long enough, they are called resistors.

I was close to report that one!

 

[davenn]

 

[berkeman]

 

[WWGD]

The Italians have to distinguish between binario and binaria, depending on the gender of the person.

As long as the espresso machine is working, it will be ok.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

View attachment 367034

I remember that one from our daily calendar. 1987 sounds about right! We got a daily Gary Larson calendar every year until he stopped making them,.

 

[jtbell]

A belated Halloween joke:

What's the Halloween capital of the U. S.?

Eerie, Pennsylvania.

 

[fresh_42]

A belated Halloween joke:

What's the Halloween capital of the U. S.?

Eerie, Pennsylvania.

And I thought Salem (Massachusetts).

 

[jtbell]

I was inspired to post that joke by an article I read in my Apple News feed just now, from People magazine. It was about a 1980s event (not Halloween related!) in Cleveland, Ohio. It consistently referred to "Lake Eerie." I thought, "someone must have had too much to drink at a Halloween party."