Collection of Lame Jokes

[Swamp Thing]

"Airplane-Shaped Kids Xylophone Toy - 8-Tone Percussion Instrument " .

.. A winged instrument?

 

[fresh_42]

 

[fresh_42]

White to move. Mate in a week.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

White to move. Mate in a week.

View attachment 366859

Chess and shuffle board all in one game. You have the slide the pieces into position.

 

[BillTre]

 

[berkeman]

 

[jtbell]

Jewel robbery in the Louvre:​

French police suspect eleven Hollywood stars​

View attachment 366664

Taken from https://www.der-postillon.com/2025/10/oceans-louvre.html.

To find the jewels, look in the suspects' attics... behind the louvers.

 

[jtbell]

 

[sbrothy]

 

[sbrothy]

Heh, yeah. You know me by now. Always testing the borders. But yeah that was a little over the top. I admit. Sorry.

EDIT: Haven't had anything to eat before now. I think that may have influenced my bad decision.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Heh, yeah. You know me by now. Always testing the borders. But yeah that was a little over the top. I admit. Sorry.

EDIT: Haven't had anything to eat before now. I think that may have influenced my bad decision.

Obviously I missed something good!

 

[fresh_42]

Heh, yeah. You know me by now. Always testing the borders. But yeah that was a little over the top. I admit. Sorry.

EDIT: Haven't had anything to eat before now. I think that may have influenced my bad decision.

Reminds me of a colleague who once said to me: "Stop! First, we go to lunch. Now!"

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Reminds me of a colleague who once said to me: "Stop! First, we go to lunch. Now!"

Reminds me of a sign I used to wear - Eat at Joes.

 

[sbrothy]

Yeah, sorry people, your loss.

I better keep it to myself though if I don't want to get kicked out of here. It's not difficult to find references I scattered around though. Think saucy.

EDIT: Oh, and by the way: I'm really impressed with the moderation speed (unless I'm on a special watch list which wouldn't surprise me)!

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Yeah, sorry people, your loss.

I better keep it to myself though if I don't want to get kicked out of here. It's not difficult to find references I scattered around though. Think saucy.

EDIT: Oh, and by the way: I'm really impressed with the moderation speed (unless I'm on a special watch list which wouldn't surprise me)!

Oh you are definitely on my watch list.

Need a watch?

 

[fresh_42]

 

[berkeman]

Damn you fresh, that took me way too long to figure out.

 

[BillTre]

Bet that one hurt!

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Looks Romulan to me.

 

[fresh_42]

Looks Romulan to me.

Wrong neutrino signature.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Wrong neutrino signature.

Nice catch! LOL!

 

[nsaspook]

 

[jack action]

Shopping centers are so boring, because if you've seen one, you've seen them all.

Spoiler: What?

you've seen the mall.

 

[jack action]

​

Jim Cantore is a meteorologist famous for a video gone viral:

​

 

[dextercioby]

 

[DaveC426913]

Shopping centers are so boring, because if you've seen one, you've seen them all.

Spoiler: What?

you've seen the mall.

Shopping centers are so boring, because if you've seen one, you've seen themall.

Better delivery?

 

[dextercioby]

Shopping centers are so boring, because if you've seen one, you've seen themall.

Better delivery?

That space between the last 2 words is exactly what makes it less lame, possibly even interesting. Deleting it, you've upgraded its lameness to a ceiling level.

 

[symbolipoint]

Shopping centers are so boring, because if you've seen one, you've seen them all.

Spoiler: What?

you've seen the mall.

I did not as much as check under the Spoiler yet. I believe I know how this joke works. "them all", "the m all" , "the mall".

 

[collinsmark]

(Source: https://reparrishcomics.com/post/798862380830490624)

 

[WWGD]

Leaks from the next planned Rocky movie ( Lost count). Rocky goes into business with his former Russian opponent and they open an optical store in Siberia: "The eye of the Taiga".