- #151
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
FizixFreak said:
No. When Chuck Norris was born, he abucted all lions and finished raising them.
Chuck Norris Counts to Infinity Twice
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The discussion centers around humorous and exaggerated "Chuck Norris facts," showcasing the legendary toughness and absurd abilities attributed to him. Participants share various jokes, such as Chuck Norris being able to count to infinity, destroy the periodic table, and even have a roundhouse kick that defies physics. The tone is light-hearted, with many finding humor in the absurdity of these claims, which are often delivered in a serious manner for comedic effect. The conversation also touches on the cultural impact of Chuck Norris jokes, suggesting they represent a unique form of humor that transcends traditional joke formats. References to pop culture, such as Family Guy and the show Survivor, further illustrate the widespread recognition of these jokes. Overall, the thread celebrates the iconic status of Chuck Norris in popular culture through a series of entertaining and outlandish anecdotes.
No. When Chuck Norris was born, he abucted all lions and finished raising them.
- #152
nismaratwork
- 358
- 0
Hurkyl said:I'm just teasing, but I found it amusing nonetheless.
It was very amusing, I'd even say outright funny.
Chuck Norris can kick an abacus into a microprocessor.
- #153
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
Chuck Norris doesn't eat zuchini. He roundhouse kicks it into prime rib, cooked medium-well.
- #154
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks a cow. He doesn't buy steaks, either. Same cow.
- #155
mugaliens
- 196
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Some say Chuck Norris was spoon-fed as a child. Not true. Chuck Norris was never a child.
- #156
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris doesn't find wool scratchy. Wool finds Chuck Norris scratchy.
- #157
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
Chuck Norris doesn't wrestle alligators. He eats them. Whole.
- #158
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
When Chuck Norris stumbled across Gilligan's Island during a morning swim, he roundhouse kicked the island and it's castaways to Hawaii. After learning how goofy they were, he roundhouse kicked them to another desert island.
- #159
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
Chuck Norris wrote, produced, directed, and acted in the movie Kick-***, as well as all other action adventure movies made since the 1300's.
- #160
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris once flicked a booger into outer space. It became the AllSpark.
- #161
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris doesn't polish furniture. It polishes him.
- #162
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
The FBI and CIA once investigated Chuck Norris. They lost.
- #163
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris doesn't pay taxes to the IRS. They pay taxes to him.
- #164
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris doesn't do laundry. The dirt flies off his clothes in fear.
- #165
Hurkyl
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In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris knocks on door.
- #166
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
Vladimir Putin fears no man.
Except Chuck Norris.
Except Chuck Norris.
- #167
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris once scanned a document, and inadvertantly created the Library of Congress.
- #168
mugaliens
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When Chuck Norris speaks, E.F. Hutton listens.
- #169
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris was hungry, but tired of the usual faire, so he roundhouse kicked a monkey into the world's first banana.
- #170
mugaliens
- 196
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The doctor didn't take Chuck Norris' appendix out. He took her out. She was cute.
- #171
mugaliens
- 196
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While visiting Egypt, a camel inadvertantly brushed up against Chuck Norris' sleeve, so he roundhouse kicked it a few thousand years into the past, thereby creating the Great Pyramids.
- #172
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
Ever wonder why we've never been visited by aliens?
Yep, you guessed it. Chuck Norris.
Yep, you guessed it. Chuck Norris.
- #173
mugaliens
- 196
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We didn't actually drop the bomb on Japan. We dropped Chuck Norris.
Twice.
Twice.
- #174
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris is the real father, and mother, of every human on the planet.
- #175
mugaliens
- 196
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It took Egypt sixteen centuries to build the sixteen Great Pyramids. It took Chuck Norris sixteen seconds to destroy the thirteen he didn't like.
- #176
mugaliens
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Continental drift? Nope. Chuck Norris.
- #177
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris never visited Europe.
Europe visited Chuck Norris.
Europe visited Chuck Norris.
- #178
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris doesn't take out the trash. He kicks it out.
- #179
mugaliens
- 196
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Chuck Norris doesn't fix his own cars. They fix themselves as he's walking towards them.
- #180
mugaliens
- 196
- 1
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep on a bed. The bed sleeps under Chuck Norris.
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