Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #3,481
jtbell said:
There are 30 cows in a field.
28 chickens.
How many didn't?
10? :oldbiggrin:
 
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  • #3,482
jtbell said:
There are 30 cows in a field.
28 chickens.
How many didn't?
I just saw this one on America's Funniest Home People!

(And thought to myself, that would never work in print...)
 
  • #3,483
There are 30 cows in a field.
28 chickens.
How many didn't?

DaveC426913 said:
I just saw this one on America's Funniest Home People!

(And thought to myself, that would never work in print...)
yeah ... it has gone over my head LOL
 
  • #3,484
Twenty ate chickens.
 
  • #3,485
DaveC426913 said:
Twenty ate chickens.
Sure? Maybe only two ate chicken.
 
  • #3,486
fresh_42 said:
Sure? Maybe only two ate chicken.
Well, that's why it's a verbal joke. :smile:
 
  • #3,487
fresh_42 said:
Sure? Maybe only two ate chicken.
That was my first thought too. But one says "twenty eight", not "two eight". :oldsmile:
 
  • #3,488
17361547_10155240650566414_3341693997623241982_n.jpg


beware the ide's of March
 
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  • #3,489
Why would cows be eating chickens in the first place? It just doesn't make sense. What is going on around me in this world?! :confused::woot::nb)
 
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  • #3,490
collinsmark said:
Why would cows be eating chickens in the first place? It just doesn't make sense.
this is true ... when did they change from vegetarians to carnivores ... did I miss a memo or board meeting ??
 
  • #3,491
They have a secret agenda... :nb)
closed-on-sundays-still-open-for-business-the-relationship-era-blog-WljJQD-clipart.jpg
 
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  • #3,492
collinsmark said:
Why would cows be eating chickens in the first place? It just doesn't make sense. What is going on around me in this world?! :confused:

davenn said:
this is true ... when did they change from vegetarians to carnivores ... did I miss a memo or board meeting ??
Don't you know how mad cow disease spread?
 
  • #3,493
Did you ever get half way through eating a horse and then realize you really weren't that hungry after all?
 
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  • #3,494
A)
Logical Dog said:
Where does a lizard go when it tail falls off?

The retail store. : - )

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autotomy

nuuskur said:
Heard this one:
Where do animals go when their tails fall off?The retail store.

..hee ..hee.. hee..right?

... Copyright problem here ...

B)
mfb said:
You ask why I bought shoes from a drug dealer?
He was the sole supplier.
What about the rest of the shoe?
 
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  • #3,495
Stavros Kiri said:
What about the rest of the shoe?
The rest of the shoe consisted of beautiful crystal mats.
 
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  • #3,496
fresh_42 said:
The rest of the show consisted of beautiful crystal mats.
Show or shoe?
 
  • #3,497
Stavros Kiri said:
Show or shoe?
Ooops.
 
  • #3,498
fresh_42 said:
The rest of the shoe consisted of beautiful crystal mats.
You mean the magic ones that turn into dust! ... and beyond ...
Then that explains why he was tripping ...
mfb said:
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.You ask why I bought shoes from a drug dealer?
He was the sole supplier.
 
  • #3,499
a good laugh ...

upload_2017-3-17_13-3-0.png
 
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  • #3,500
There were two brothers from Scotland. They went into the transportation industry, taking people between Glasgow and nearby small towns.

The business went very well, until one day there was a tragic accident. One of the brothers broke his neck.
 
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  • #3,501
DaveC426913 said:
I just saw this one on America's Funniest Home People!
Ha! You outed one of my prime sources! :-p

(I think you meant "Videos" not "People".)
 
  • #3,502
DaveC426913 said:
Well, that's why it's a verbal joke. :smile:

Here is a print joke that does not work verbally:

There are 10 kinds of people in the world; those that understand binary and those that don't.
 
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  • #3,503
Aufbauwerk 2045 said:
There were two brothers from Scotland. They went into the transportation industry, taking people between Glasgow and nearby small towns.

The business went very well, until one day there was a tragic accident. One of the brothers broke his neck.
Quite a business! Fast too! ...
 
  • #3,504
BillTre said:
Here is a print joke that does not work verbally:

There are 10 kinds of people in the world; those that understand binary and those that don't.
Well, you do and I do so that makes 10 of us.
 
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  • #3,505
phinds said:
Well, you do and I do so that makes 10 of us.
11.
 
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  • #3,507
This might make a decent series progression question for a SAT test.
 
  • #3,508
BillTre said:
Here is a print joke that does not work verbally:

There are 10 kinds of people in the world; those that understand binary and those that don't.
phinds said:
Well, you do and I do so that makes 10 of us.
... or it's a regular 10 (ten) ... and he doesn't! ...
 
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  • #3,509
jtbell said:
(I think you meant "Videos" not "People".)
There used to be two shows aired simultaneously: AFHV and AFP.
My wife kept getting them confused and calling them America's Funniest Home People. So it stuck.
 
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  • #3,510
Aufbauwerk 2045 said:
There were two brothers from Scotland. They went into the transportation industry, taking people between Glasgow and nearby small towns.

The business went very well, until one day there was a tragic accident. One of the brothers broke his neck.
Either I am a dunce, or you have a morbid sense of humour.
 
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