Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
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  • #10,002
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  • #10,003
256bits said:
What are the skyscrapers?
Kamikaze terrorist moth traps?
 
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  • #10,004
Filip Larsen said:
I don't get it.
I interpreted it to mean that he's deliberately embarassing his daughter in the eyes of every person on the way to school, and then in front of the whole school.

Filip Larsen said:
He is clearly not wearing socks in his sandals
He's not wearing socks in order to maximise the free distribution of his foot pong.
Filip Larsen said:
so why is she looking like that??
Because she's standing really close to his feet. :oldruck:
 
  • #10,005
Bezos is due to be delivered to space in two days. However if he joined Amazon Prime he could be there this afternoon.
 
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  • #10,007
Ivan Seeking said:
Yuck! You never wear pizza with donuts.
... or fruit loops.
 
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  • #10,008
fresh_42 said:
... or fruit loops.
You never wear fruit loops in the summer. :oldeyes:
 
  • #10,009
I saw a trailer on TV today for a Laurel & Hardy film to be shown next week. Apparently Laurel & Hardy are working as pest controllers.

Man
Why are you drilling holes in my floor?
Laurel
To let the mice in.
Man
Then why are you putting corks in the holes?
Laurel
To stop them getting out.
 
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  • #10,010
DrGreg said:
I saw a trailer on TV today for a Laurel & Hardy film to be shown next week. Apparently Laurel & Hardy are working as pest controllers.

Man
Why are you drilling holes in my floor?
Laurel
To let the mice in.
Man
Then why are you putting corks in the holes?
Laurel
To stop them getting out.
I still remember an old 3 Stooges gag where they wanted access to some event but couldn't get in unless they had press passes. So they went into the men's restroom and took the "Press" sign from something like the towel dispensers. Each Stooge grabs a sticker and put it in his wallet. Then they each pass through security while displaying their passes:
Press
Press
Pull

I must have thought that was freaking hilarious when I was 8 or so because it's about the only joke I remember from them.
 
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  • #10,011
I keep hoping an alien spacecraft will crash into a SETI antenna.
 
  • #10,012
Ivan Seeking said:
[...] it's about the only joke I remember from [the 3 Stooges].
Because of this,... TIL that googling "curly whoop whoop whoop" actually brings up relevant video clips.
 
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  • #10,014
WWGD said:
I'm not 100% sure since I cannot see his face, but I think this little bastard is a notorious thief. But you know, innocent until proven otherwise. We must respect his privacy until then.
 
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  • #10,015
fresh_42 said:
I'm not 100% sure since I cannot see his face, but I think this little bastard is a notorious thief. But you know, innocent until proven otherwise. We must respect his privacy until then.
He's a typical jailbird.

And when interrogated he was singing like a bird.
 
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  • #10,016
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  • #10,017
Ivan Seeking said:
How do I know that photo was likely taken in Luxembourg?
No idea. Close , Netherlands actually.
 
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WWGD said:
No idea. Close , Netherlands actually.
To avoid offending any Dutchs that jump when anyone says Holland to refer to The Netherlands. Though don't remember any Dutch referring to themselves as " Netherlandese".
 
  • #10,019
WWGD said:
No idea. Close , Netherlands actually.
Nope. I'd bet someone in Nederland just used a photo taken in Luxembourg.
 
  • #10,020
Ivan Seeking said:
Nope
How so?
 
  • #10,021
WWGD said:
How so?

The graffiti is in Luxembourgian.
 
  • #10,022
Ivan Seeking said:
The graffiti is in Luxembourgian.
Maybe they bought it in Luxemburg?
 
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WWGD said:
Maybe they bought it in Luxemburg?
Bought what?
 
  • #10,024
Ivan Seeking said:
Bought what?
The paper containing the graffiti.
 
  • #10,025
WWGD said:
The paper containing the graffiti.
I'm talking about the writing on the cement.
 
  • #10,026
Ivan Seeking said:
I'm talking about the writing on the cement.
Ah, cement, I assumed it was some other material.
 
  • #10,027
Ivan Seeking said:
I'm talking about the writing on the cement.
You can distinguish nederlands from letzebergisch? And even more: you could decipher what was concretely written on the concrete?
 
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  • #10,029
mfb said:
The picture was posted by the police in Utrecht. I'll make a guess: It was also taken in Utrecht (NL).
https://time.com/5689057/bird-arrest/
I wouldn't be surprised if the dude was searched by interpol!
 
  • #10,030
fresh_42 said:
I wouldn't be surprised if the dude was searched by interpol!
Dudes? No, no horses. Though some horsing around.
 
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  • #10,032
fresh_42 said:
I wouldn't be surprised if the dude was searched by interpol!
Dude? It was obviously a bird.
 
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  • #10,034
Ibix said:
Dude? It was obviously a bird.
The bird is the word.
 
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  • #10,036
I've got a German friend who is a sound technician.

I've got a Czech one too. Czech one too.
 
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cat-vs-dog.jpg
 
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  • #10,038
I don't trust the website I visited for weight loss advice.

It asked me to accept cookies.
 
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  • #10,039
DrGreg said:
I don't trust the website I visited for weight loss advice.

It asked me to accept cookies.
The fact that it does is a Brussel sprout.
 
  • #10,040
fresh_42 said:
You can distinguish nederlands from letzebergisch? And even more: you could decipher what was concretely written on the concrete?
"wiigrecht" only comes up as Luxembourgish
 
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  • #10,043
After the Blue Origin launch this morning, our TV station cut back to its local talk show which was showing back-to-school fashions, including some retro flapper-style stuff. I said to my wife, "That looks so Twenties... no wait, it IS the Twenties." :doh:
 
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  • #10,047
Meaning humanity. Might not make it. Might not make it.
 
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