Collection of Science Jokes P2

fresh_42

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If you consider buying a decent telescope, the only black hole you will find is the new one in your wallet.

Edit: (I found a picture on the topic)

un-neutron-star-black-hole-my-hopes-dreams-4247038.png
 
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..so that he will be increasing the dosage? (if we forget about the intended derivative joke)
 

davenn

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I have many chemistry puns,
but I’m afraid they won’t get a good reaction
 

Demystifier

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Application of the Great Unification Theory above to quantum mechanics. The probability current in quantum mechanics for a particle moving in one dimension is
$$j=\frac{\hbar}{2mi} \left( \psi^*\frac{\partial\psi}{\partial x}-\psi\frac{\partial\psi^*}{\partial x} \right)$$
Using the unification formula above, the current can be written in the electric engineering form
$$i=\frac{\hbar}{2mj} \left( \psi^*\frac{\partial\psi}{\partial x}-\psi\frac{\partial\psi^*}{\partial x} \right)$$
 
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Write it as $$i=\frac{\hbar}{2mi} \left( \psi^*\frac{\partial\psi}{\partial x}-\psi\frac{\partial\psi^*}{\partial x} \right)$$ and simplify: $$-1=\frac{\hbar}{2m} \left( \psi^*\frac{\partial\psi}{\partial x}-\psi\frac{\partial\psi^*}{\partial x} \right)$$
 

Demystifier

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$$-1=\frac{\hbar}{2m} \left( \psi^*\frac{\partial\psi}{\partial x}-\psi\frac{\partial\psi^*}{\partial x} \right)$$
The left-hand side is real and the right-hand side is imaginary, which is only possible if both sides are zero. Hence the wave function is real (which is compatible with the PBR theorem) and ##-1=0## (which makes sense because one cannot have less than zero particles).
 

fresh_42

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The Great Unification Theory that unifies physics with electric engineering:
$$i=j$$
Typical pop science chasing for headlines! I have made the effort and had a look in the original paper which this article relies on. And there it is said ##i=\mathbf{\hat{j}}##.
 

chasrob

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How do you tell the difference between a teacher and a chemist?
Ask them to pronounce unionized.
 

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