Why do people mistake me for a man online?

  • Thread starter Thread starter GreatEscapist
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AI Thread Summary
The discussion centers around the frequent misidentification of gender in online forums, particularly in physics-related communities. Participants share experiences of being assumed to be male due to gender-neutral usernames or cultural biases that favor male identities in technical fields. The conversation highlights the challenges faced by women in physics, with some members noting that women often use feminine usernames or avatars to avoid unwanted attention, while others express that they prefer being perceived as male for the respect it can bring. The thread also touches on the broader implications of gender identity in online interactions, including the use of language and the cultural norms that shape assumptions about gender. Overall, the dialogue reflects a mix of humor and frustration regarding gender perceptions in digital spaces.

Did you think I was a man?

  • Yes

    Votes: 13 65.0%

  • No

    Votes: 7 35.0%
  • Total voters
    20
  • Poll closed .
GreatEscapist
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https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=406192"

Well, did you? I'M NOT.

Why is it that people on the Net think I am a guy? In real life, I get teased for being not too feminine, but no matter WHAT site, everything thinks I'm a guy. And they're so SURE of it, too.

*sighs*
 
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Hrm, well, I don't have an opinion about you one way or the other, but I could hazard a guess and say that, with a gender-neutral name, the default guess seems to be male. And thinking about that now, for me, I do it too. So, maybe that's it.

Edited to add: okay, I saw this thread before the other one where you actually discuss why this may be. As far as this poll goes, I'd like an "I don't have an opinion" option. A straight "yes" or "no" doesn't cover all the bases.
 
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GreatEscapist said:
https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=406192"

Well, did you? I'M NOT.

Why is it that people on the Net think I am a guy? In real life, I get teased for being not too feminine, but no matter WHAT site, everything thinks I'm a guy. And they're so SURE of it, too.

*sighs*
When I first joined, people thought I was male. What is funny is that there is a male member that men think is female and he gets hit on a lot by men when he posts. :-p
 
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Geez I didn't realize this was a date site :(
 
A lot of women don't care, or in fact, prefer people make the mistake so they avoid getting hit on a lot.

So, if it bothers you, why don't you change you username?

Or better yet, change your avatar to a pic of you in a bikini.
 
Well, if it bothers you, there are ways to deal with it. Like, you can put something on your user page that male PFers will recognize as feminine (maybe, a puppy or cute little bird?). Or you could change your name to GreatEscapista.

OK so I'm being a bit sarcastic :biggrin:. I think there is a cultural bias on the internet towards maleness...and I'm not sure why. Sure the early users were probably mostly male but that's long since changed.

One thing to keep in mind: in proper English, when you don't know the gender of a person, using the pronoun "he" is perfectly acceptable. Now, in the English most people use, the pronoun "they" is used in those cases, so most people's ears aren't calibrated to thinking of "he" as gender neutral. So you may be being referred to as "he" only because the poster doesn't know your gender and uses proper English. Yes I realize, the chances of someone actually using proper English on the web is a looooong shot :-p.
 
Can we get some proof? Like at least 5 pics.
 
lisab said:
One thing to keep in mind: in proper English, when you don't know the gender of a person, using the pronoun "he" is perfectly acceptable.
I assumed GE knew this, so I assumed s/he is complaining about a phenomenon above and beyond mere default gender assignation.
 
I've had so many sex-change operations I can't remember what I started out as.
 
  • #10
I thought you were a man until you called me jerk for making fun of girls in Random Thoughts. I didn't know what to make out of it other than making an assumption about your gender.
 
  • #11
From time to time people used to mistake me as a female, But I think my avatar has solved that problem.
 
  • #12
It's a forum on physics... can you blame people?
 
  • #13
If it's the internet, I automatically assume everyone is guy. Plus it's physics it's like double guyness. Too many fakers. A lot girls pretend to be guys to avoid guys hitting on them.
 
  • #14
When I joined engineering school, there were 5 females out of 305 freshmen. Not good.
 
  • #15
Anonymous internet forums are meant to do discuss things other than identity of forum members. For that there is facebook or myspace. Of course you can always reveal something about yourself if you want to. If you don't drop any hints, then people are going to assume whatever they are going to assume, and it still has little bearing on you participating in discussions.
 
  • #16
GreatEscapist said:
https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=406192"

Well, did you? I'M NOT.

Why is it that people on the Net think I am a guy? In real life, I get teased for being not too feminine, but no matter WHAT site, everything thinks I'm a guy. And they're so SURE of it, too.

*sighs*


Did you think we cared much ? o:)
 
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  • #17
I did not really have any idea one way or the other. I may have considered you male though. "GreatEscapist" is nothing very feminine. One of my online friends, who has a feminine sounding SN, when I first 'met' him was talking about making out with a cute boy so I kinda assumed.
 
  • #18
I think it's a pseudo-cultural thing. The two girls who already posted in this thread have "girl names" as part of their forum name, which is pretty common for girls to do from my experience. Guys tend to have names unrelated to themselves, like "TheEscapist". Also girls tend to decorate their profile with pictures and signatures, while guys more often leave everything blank :smile:.
 
  • #19
Hudson: "Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man?"

Vasquez: "No. Have you?"
 
  • #20
Mu naught said:
I think it's a pseudo-cultural thing. The two girls who already posted in this thread have "girl names" as part of their forum name, which is pretty common for girls to do from my experience. Guys tend to have names unrelated to themselves, like "TheEscapist". Also girls tend to decorate their profile with pictures and signatures, while guys more often leave everything blank :smile:.

Actually there have been no fewer than four female posters in this thread so far (including the OP). Also, I haven't noticed that the female members "decorate" more then the males. But maybe that's just PF - I suspect the Sisterhood is not representative of the general female population.
 
  • #21
Antiphon said:
Hudson: "Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man?"

Vasquez: "No. Have you?"

A classic. :-p
 
  • #22
didn't have an opinion because I've not noticed you before. the username seems masculine to me. don't know any female escape artists offhand.
 
  • #23
Well, I don't have a problem with it. It made me feel so manly and stuff. :-p

I was just curious. I think it's hilarious.
 
  • #24
Still waitin' on them bikini pix...
 
  • #25
lisab said:
Actually there have been no fewer than four female posters in this thread so far (including the OP). Also, I haven't noticed that the female members "decorate" more then the males. But maybe that's just PF - I suspect the Sisterhood is not representative of the general female population.

Annoying girls vs normal girls vs normal males vs annoying good with girls males
 
  • #26
"Do YOU think I am a man? " --not now

"Did YOU think I am a man?"--yes
 
  • #27
DaveC426913 said:
Still waitin' on them bikini pix...

:rolleyes:
Get in line. :-p

rootX said:
Annoying girls vs normal girls vs normal males vs annoying good with girls males

That's the reeeeal problem, huh?
 
  • #28
Mu naught said:
I think it's a pseudo-cultural thing. The two girls who already posted in this thread have "girl names" as part of their forum name, which is pretty common for girls to do from my experience. Guys tend to have names unrelated to themselves, like "TheEscapist". Also girls tend to decorate their profile with pictures and signatures, while guys more often leave everything blank :smile:.

Actually, up until very, very recently, I've almost always used gender neutral names online so I'd get treated like a person. I can leave that up to your mind to wrap around, and I don't necessarily mean 'not get hit on'. But I learned that lesson from online gaming and having female avatars. I switched to playing male avatars really, really quickly. I, me, personally, didn't pretend to be anything. Meaning that I didn't pretend to be male. I simply behaved as I behave. Other people in-game assumed that, because of my avatar, the person on the other end of the modem was male too. No one asked me directly. And life was much easier that way.

On this board, though, it's not annoying. :smile:
 
  • #29
GeorginaS said:
Actually, up until very, very recently, I've almost always used gender neutral names online so I'd get treated like a person. I can leave that up to your mind to wrap around, and I don't necessarily mean 'not get hit on'. But I learned that lesson from online gaming and having female avatars. I switched to playing male avatars really, really quickly. I, me, personally, didn't pretend to be anything. Meaning that I didn't pretend to be male. I simply behaved as I behave. Other people in-game assumed that, because of my avatar, the person on the other end of the modem was male too. No one asked me directly. And life was much easier that way.

On this board, though, it's not annoying. :smile:

I agree. I usually enjoy being thought of as a man (Until girls start hitting on me. :)
It just makes life easier- more respect, more guy friends (Guys online are waaay better than girls online- you can figure that one out.)

I almost was worried about admitting it here. But I figured what the hell. :-p
 
  • #30
Attention seeker.

We don't care.
 
  • #31
Why is it that people on the Net think I am a guy? In real life, I get teased for being not too feminine, but no matter WHAT site, everything thinks I'm a guy. And they're so SURE of it, too.
Now I think you're just a guy pretending to be a girl and making fun of us. You have posted this thread to make us poor guys start hitting on you.
 
  • #32
If it makes you feel any better, I assume that everyone online in any form of RPG is male despite their avatar's gender. Same goes for chat rooms. Sure I'll treat someone who says they are female as such (saying "she" and such), but I don't go as far as to "flirt with any of them. I don't much like the idea of anonymously flirting with a forty-five year old man wearing high heels and no pants.
.
.
.
... Or do I?
 
  • #33
luma said:
Attention seeker.

We don't care.

well, your sig sounds like a female signature/name, but your answer sounds like a male...

so,...
 
  • #34
luma said:
Attention seeker.

We don't care.

rewebster said:
well, your sig sounds like a female signature/name, but your answer sounds like a male...

so,...

Actually, the response sounded kinda catty, to me.
 
  • #35
GeorginaS said:
Actually, the response sounded kinda catty, to me.

are you saying, there may be a...?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/KQrJ7Jcendo&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/KQrJ7Jcendo&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>
 
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  • #36
Is there a Turing-test equivalent for gender?
 
  • #37
First rule of the internet: "Male until proven female."
 
  • #38
EnumaElish said:
Is there a Turing-test equivalent for gender?

A pelvic exam? :biggrin:
 
  • #39
Geigerclick said:
A pelvic exam? :biggrin:
Good. I meant remote, just like http://testing.turinghub.com/ .
 
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  • #40
EnumaElish said:
Good. I meant remote, just like http://testing.turinghub.com/ .

A pelvic exam with a webcam? :)

That, or you ask everyone why they leave the turtle to die on its back...
 
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  • #41
Geigerclick said:
That, or you ask everyone why they leave the turtle to die on its back...
"My significant other trained me for it."
 
  • #42
EnumaElish said:
"My significant other trained me for it."

You're good!
 
  • #43
Geigerclick said:
You're good!
"Thanks, you are a nice person, unless you are a computer."
 
  • #44
my username can be a male or a female..in my place it is given name for both genders.
 
  • #45
GreatEscapist said:
https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=406192"

Well, did you? I'M NOT.

Why is it that people on the Net think I am a guy? In real life, I get teased for being not too feminine, but no matter WHAT site, everything thinks I'm a guy. And they're so SURE of it, too.

*sighs*

I thought you were a guy. But it was more of a default assumption, since I didn't read too many of your posts. Usually it's a good assumption, because there aren't that many girls in physics. In my department, there is one American girl inthe last three years of graduate classes combined.

People often (mistakenly!) assume I'm a girl simply because my user name ends in an a. Serves me right for using the same user name that an old ISP randomly assigned me back in the day.
 
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  • #46
Rajini said:
my username can be a male or a female..in my place it is given name for both genders.
Do you see a tortoise when you look down?
 
  • #47
EnumaElish said:
Do you see a tortoise when you look down?
why you ask ?
 
  • #49
EnumaElish said:
It's a part of the test.

Ohh..i think i have to go out of this thread..!
have fun.
 
  • #50
Rajini said:
Ohh..i think i have to go out of this thread..!
have fun.
See my edit above (the link about the turtle). It's a variation on a Blade Runner theme -- a robot is questioned about a turtle, to verify that he (it?) is a robot, not a human.
 
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