Solving the Problem of "Cat Demands": A Proposal

[Ivan Seeking]

Describe a problem that bugs you and what you would do about it.

I mentioned one of my favorites before:

Goal: Provide motive to reduce the demand for foreign oil. Reduce CO2 emissions. Make the roads safer for responsible citizens who drive small, fuel efficient vehicles.

Solution: Treat all vehicles over 4000 Lbs or so - to include large SUVs and heavy trucks, as many states do tractor-trailors - limit all heavy vehicles to a maximum speed of 55 MPH, and limit travel to the rightmost lanes only on highways and freeways.

Issue 2:
Cat bugs me to death until he or she gets whatever he or she wants.

Solution: Do whatever the cat says.

 

[Smurf]

Goal: Reduce advertising.

Solution: The tax-code already includes a separate column for 'advertising'. Make it not 100% tax deductible.

Issue 2:
Cat bugs me to death until he or she gets whatever he or she wants.

Solution: Kill the cat.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Issue 2:
Cat bugs me to death until he or she gets whatever he or she wants.

Solution: Kill the cat.

This answer is incorrect since the procedure would have to be repeated at least nine times to be completely effective. In the meantime the cat would find a way to kill you. Ivan's answer is correct.

 

[ice109]

problem: gravity, the electroweak nuclear, and strong nuclear force aren't unified

solution:

 

[berkeman]

Problem -- Internet spam.

Solution -- Charge everybody a penny to send an e-mail over the Internet. Since most of us send and receive about the same amount of e-mail, the net cost would be a wash for us. But spammers send bzillions of e-mails, so now they would be having to pay good money to bug people...

 

[Cyrus]

Describe a problem that bugs you and what you would do about it.

I mentioned one of my favorites before:

Goal: Provide motive to reduce the demand for foreign oil. Reduce CO2 emissions. Make the roads safer for responsible citizens who drive small, fuel efficient vehicles.

Solution: Treat all vehicles over 4000 Lbs or so - to include large SUVs and heavy trucks, as many states do tractor-trailors - limit all heavy vehicles to a maximum speed of 55 MPH, and limit travel to the rightmost lanes only on highways and freeways.

Issue 2: <<---
Cat bugs me to death until he or she gets whatever he or she wants.

Solution: Do whatever the cat says.

ISSUE number 3: What number am I thinking?

Patty patty buke buke - 82? WRONG
Eleanor gee I think your swellanor- 40? WRONG
Morton town USA -212? WRONG
Jackorino - 2? WRONGGGGGGGGG.

The correct answer is 134, 134444.

BYE BYEEEEEEEEE

 

[berkeman]

Problem -- Understanding Cyrus' post:

ISSUE number 3: What number am I thinking?

Patty patty buke buke - 82? WRONG
Eleanor geet I think your swellanor- 40? WRONG
Morton town USA -212? WRONG
Jackorino - 2? WRONGGGGGGGGG.

The correct answer is 134, 134444.

BYE BYEEEEEEEEE

Solution -- I have no idea...

 

[daveb]

Problem -- Internet spam.

Solution -- Charge everybody a penny to send an e-mail over the Internet. Since most of us send and receive about the same amount of e-mail, the net cost would be a wash for us. But spammers send bzillions of e-mails, so now they would be having to pay good money to bug people...

But isn't the problem that they spoof someone else's computer and make that computer send the email?

 

[BobG]

Describe a problem that bugs you and what you would do about it.

I mentioned one of my favorites before:

Goal: Provide motive to reduce the demand for foreign oil. Reduce CO2 emissions. Make the roads safer for responsible citizens who drive small, fuel efficient vehicles.

Solution: Treat all vehicles over 4000 Lbs or so - to include large SUVs and heavy trucks, as many states do tractor-trailors - limit all heavy vehicles to a maximum speed of 55 MPH, and limit travel to the rightmost lanes only on highways and freeways.

You could drop that weight limit to 3000 lbs, if you want. That would include Jeeps. They get lousy gas mileage and aren't designed to drive at freeway speeds anyway (although driving 75 with doors and top off is a great way to dry out the carpet after a rain and clean out any litter that's found its way under the seats).

Keep the trucks and SUVs limited to those that actually use them vs all the people who drive them because they're more macho than a minivan.

It keeps manufacturers from diluting their SUV brands, as well. Ford Explorers and Chevy Blazers used to be good off-road vehicles. Now, both barely retain any off-road capability while other SUVs, like the Mercury Mountaineer, don't even pretend to be more than a big minivan. Appealling to soccer moms may increase profits for auto companies, but it steals away real SUV brands just as sure as if the company discontinued the line.

 

[BobG]

Problem -- Internet spam.

Solution -- Charge everybody a penny to send an e-mail over the Internet. Since most of us send and receive about the same amount of e-mail, the net cost would be a wash for us. But spammers send bzillions of e-mails, so now they would be having to pay good money to bug people...

But isn't the problem that they spoof someone else's computer and make that computer send the email?

Yes. Computer users would invest in better security software.

Or, revise e-mail programs to institute a 10 second delay between outputting a new e-mail. This means an e-mail sent to some 50 users would take over 8 minutes to leave your system, but how many times a day (or week) does the average person send out shotgun e-mails? It would only affect spammers, since it would drastically cut down on the number of e-mails they send out a day.

 

[matthyaouw]

Problem -- Internet spam.

Solution -- Charge everybody a penny to send an e-mail over the Internet. Since most of us send and receive about the same amount of e-mail, the net cost would be a wash for us. But spammers send bzillions of e-mails, so now they would be having to pay good money to bug people...

What about mailing lists, or forums like this that could be sending thousands of reply notifications a day?

 

[berkeman]

Okay, okay. Points well taken. No simple spam solutions today...

 

[ice109]

Okay, okay. Points well taken. No simple spam solutions today...

i still get spam via snail mail, i think we should solve that problem before working on more advanced ones

 

[BobG]

i still get spam via snail mail, i think we should solve that problem before working on more advanced ones

The trash can works well for snail mail spam. The mouse needs some improvement. It usually just chews up the mail and leaves it on the floor instead of dragging it to the trash can.

The mouse is a solution to the problem of how to keep the cat occupied, though.

 

[moose]

Problem: Slow servers

Solution: Cry

 

[BobG]

Problem: Slow servers

Solution: Cry

The solution would be for programmers to learn about computer hardware, then write their programs to make the most efficient use of the caches and dual-core processing. Slow memory kills a lot of the advantages of a fast processor. Of course, your programs have to work on a multitude of computers, so writing a program that detects the computer's hardware configuration, and then self-modifies how the program operates to take advantage of the hardware would be kind of challenging, especially in a higher level language like C++.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Problem -- Understanding Cyrus' post:



Solution -- I have no idea...

That is known as McLaughlineze


It is a secret language known only to talkinghead-speak experts.

BYE BYEEEEEEE