alantheastronomer said:
you can have "energy in the gravitational field" included in the "source" but only at the expense of having the source no longer be automatically conserved."
Yes. But this has nothing to do with the EFE, the graviton field equation, being nonlinear (i.e., self-interacting). It has to do with the Einstein tensor being the one that satisfies the Bianchi identities. The same kind of phenomenon occurs in electromagnetism, even though the photon field equation--Maxwell's Equations--is linear: the photon field carries no source (charge-current), and this is what enables automatic conservation of the source in the field equation.
You should probably read my series of Insights articles on "does gravity gravitate"? There are a lot of issues here that you don't seem to be aware of. The series starts here:
https://www.physicsforums.com/insights/does-gravity-gravitate/
Also, none of this calls the validity of the spin-2 field model into question. The main issue with the quantum field theory of the spin-2 field is that it is not renormalizable (whereas the Standard Model of particle physics, for example, is). But most physicists today believe that none of the QFTs we have today are truly fundamental, so non-renormalizability doesn't make them invalid, period; it just limits the domain in which they are valid (roughly, energies that are small compared with the energy at which the non-renormalizable terms in the Lagrangian become significant).
alantheastronomer said:
has there been any relationship established between the graviton and the Higgs boson?
The graviton is not included in the Standard Model, which is the QFT that includes the Higgs boson. So other than the Higgs boson carrying stress-energy, which all of the Standard Model fields do, there is no relationship known.
Also, the spin-2 field theory of the graviton is speculative, since we have no prospect of measuring any quantum aspects of gravity or gravitational waves any time soon so there is no experimental evidence for gravitons.