Programming Jokes: Lame, Science & Math Jokes!

In summary: An oldie but a goodie: Why do programmers confuse halloween and Christmas?What do you call it when a story goes round a stable time loop and returns to its own beginning?CSS properties are pretty flexible and browser renderers can be pretty accommodating. For example, the font-size property can accept a few different units of measurement, including px and em.Why does it take programmers so long to wash their hair?Because on the shampoo bottle it says "Lather, rinse and repeat".Q: How do you comfort a JavaScript bug?A: You console it.From a college drinking song:An MIT computer man got drunk one
  • #106
Tom.G said:
It may be stable but, I bet its thruput stinks.
There must be a lot of people with the same setup since there's so much manure on the internet. :oldtongue:
 
  • Haha
Likes Tom.G and Wrichik Basu
Physics news on Phys.org
  • #107
Thanks to autocorrect, 1 in 5 children will be getting a visit from Satan this Christmas.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes Wrichik Basu, jack action, BillTre and 1 other person
  • #108
Borg said:
I was having trouble with my internet at the farm, so I moved the modem to the barn.

Actually, that was a rather lofty idea. . . . :-p
.
 
  • Like
Likes BillTre and Borg
  • #109
OCR said:
Actually, that was a rather lofty idea. . . . :-p
.
Just don't move it to the chicken coop. It will get fowled up.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes BillTre and OCR
  • #110
Borg said:
Just don't move it to the chicken coop. It will get fowled up.
According to this Wikipedia article, performance can be relatively poor. Also note the out of order delivery.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IP_over_Avian_Carriers said:
$ ping -c 9 -i 900 10.0.3.1
PING 10.0.3.1 (10.0.3.1): 56 data bytes
64 bytes from 10.0.3.1: icmp_seq=0 ttl=255 time=6165731.1 ms
64 bytes from 10.0.3.1: icmp_seq=4 ttl=255 time=3211900.8 ms
64 bytes from 10.0.3.1: icmp_seq=2 ttl=255 time=5124922.8 ms
64 bytes from 10.0.3.1: icmp_seq=1 ttl=255 time=6388671.9 ms
 
  • Like
Likes Borg and OCR
  • #111
1672087293660.png
 
  • Like
Likes Ibix and BillTre
  • #114
XSWokP_hJQqa2CXKFYUT_JjJPpA22jJzG9rWDuYFXOw.jpg
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes Filip Larsen, jack action, Borg and 1 other person
  • #119
Wrichik Basu said:
auhw3vsptz9a1-png.png


Yep, we actually had something very similar in our Emergency Evacuation Plan for employees. "Save your work, grab your wallet/purse and keys and evacuate the building to the assembly area". :smile:
 
  • #120
berkeman said:
Save your work
In the cloud, I believe? The hard disk won't be very helpful in case of a fire…
 
  • #121
Wrichik Basu said:
In the cloud, I believe? The hard disk won't be very helpful in case of a fire…
As long as the HDD survives the drenching by the sprinklers, we should still have the data. That was back in the pre-cloud days (AKA the Stone Age). :wink:
 
  • Like
Likes Wrichik Basu
  • #122
Wrichik Basu said:
In the cloud, I believe? The hard disk won't be very helpful in case of a fire…
We once got to the airport and found our airline's staff logging check-ins by hand. Don't know if true or not, but the story we heard was that there had been a fire in their data center, and the backup data center was in the same building.

At least the safety record suggests that their pilots are a bit better at their jobs...
 
  • Wow
Likes Wrichik Basu
  • #123
Ibix said:
and the backup data center was in the same building.
Oops...
 
  • Like
Likes BillTre
  • #124
Maybe they even had the backups on the same drives. :rolleyes:
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes BillTre, Wrichik Basu and berkeman
  • #125
Good news is, they kept paper copies of all the data. Bad news is, that's where the fire started.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes phinds, Wrichik Basu, Ibix and 3 others
  • #135
This has been me more times than I'll admit.

CodeReview.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes Filip Larsen, BillTre, Ibix and 1 other person
  • #136
I think that there's more than one programmer who's wanted to do this.

NewHireBugFix.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes collinsmark, Tom.G, BillTre and 2 others
  • #137
Borg said:
I think that there's more than one programmer who's wanted to do this.

View attachment 320505
That'd be an interesting interview.
"So, what attracts you to work at our company?"
"Ticket AB1234 in your issue tracker."
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes DrClaude, BillTre, jack action and 3 others

Similar threads

Replies
0
Views
558
  • General Discussion
8
Replies
261
Views
22K
  • General Discussion
Replies
7
Views
2K
  • General Discussion
Replies
5
Views
775
  • Science Fiction and Fantasy Media
Replies
17
Views
3K
Replies
16
Views
1K
Replies
9
Views
1K
  • Computing and Technology
Replies
22
Views
2K
  • General Discussion
Replies
4
Views
522
  • General Discussion
Replies
1
Views
5K
Back
Top