You are actually in the middle of some interesting areas in QM. You are probably familiar with the term "wave-particle" duality. This maps to the HUP in the formalism. The HUP essentially says that there is an inverse relationship between the definiteness of the position of a particle and the momentum of a particle. You can wrap whatever words you want around this, but the HUP is still the guiding principle. Because of this, it is not really possible to *strictly* speak of a fundamental particle's size. The reason it is called a point particle is because in the limit it acts as one. Further, it has no internal structure (as opposed to protons, for example, which consist of quarks and clearly display a discernable structure). So clearly, the boundaries are cloudy here.
Further: there is a virtual field which surrounds matter (atomic particles: electron, proton, and neutron also - but that nets to essentialy zero). So it is difficult to discuss the boundary here without reference to the charge field, which can technically be said to extend everywhere.
And further: most particles are members of a variety of larger systems. This means they cannot fully be described independently, although they can be setup so their other associations can be mostly ignored.
Now, as to whether these facts violate classical logic or not, you can take your pick. Either they do, because we classicly define objects such that they have clear boundaries. Or they don't, because such definition defies the facts.
As to the "anger" you are feeling instead of "love"...

Actually you will find this board a very welcoming place and good people (like ZapperZ) will spend time trying to help you. We have a lot of folks come here that try to say things like: "Have you considered X?" That doesn't sit too well; try re-phrasing things so it is YOU (rather than us) that is considering other things - you will find a warmer reception that does not bump into the guidelines. (I can personally tell you, as an amateur in the field, that just about any crazy idea that you can think of has in fact been considered by serious top pros. And a paper published to boot!) Take advantage of the great folks here and you will both enjoy and learn. And there is plenty of vigorous debate and discussion too, a lot of different viewpoints! Plenty of room for yours too, if expressed properly.