Entropee said:
... (because I'm talking about how the LHC is a good test for string theory) ...
That's the main trouble with your paper, Entropee. String theorists have not made any concrete quantitative prediction which the LHC can test---and thereby test the theory. So you are basing your whole paper on a false assumption. I'll explain with some examples:
Major issues are, for example, the existence of extra dimensions and the existence of partner particles---socalled "supersymmetric" particles which have never been detected but are like shadow partners of those we know about.
Unfortunately, string theorists are not on record predicting that the LHC will detect any definite partner particles, or on the other hand predicting that the LHC will NOT. They don't predict either way. So LHC finding or not finding would not prove anything.
Unfortunately too, they do not make any definite prediction about LHC finding evidence of extra dimensions. They don't say it will and they don't say it won't. So nothing LHC is expected to be able to do, when they get it working, can actually test the validity of string thinking.
Tom Stoer gave you a good brief summary at the very start of your thread:
tom.stoer said:
...
String theory tries to construct a supersymmetric framework in 10 (11) dimensions from which all known elementary particles and interactions including gravity emerge (uniquely) from the modes of an one-dimensional, vibrating string.
The [word "tries" is in bold letters] because up to now they did not succeed; "uniquely" is in brackets because there are indications that the theory is by no means unique...
...
Entropee said:
...thanks Tom, the only problem with yours is it's too complicated for my class. I have been coming up with things along those lines but I realize I have to "dumb it down" a lot, considering it's english class...
Tom's description is already as simple as it can be. You don't want to "dumb it down". You want to unpack it and make it understandable. That means put it in the context of two other sentences, so that the sentence about string can be simple. Set up the context first.
"The aim of particle physics is to explain the list of fundamental particles and describe their interactions---construct a theoretical framework where you can so-to-speak "turn the crank" and out will come the list of known particles together with formulas describing them (masses, charges) and their interactions (forces, how they decay, how they react with each other)."
So far you have not used up your sentence about string theory because this sentence only sets the scene. It is not about string theory. It is a general statement that applies to all theoretical particle physics, whatever the approach. Now you can say what string is, in one sentence.
"String is an approach which tries to do this by representing particles as small flexible objects instead of points."
Now you have given a simple one-sentence definition and you can, if you want, say something about the string theoretical framework. This is not definition, it is discussion of something you just defined. So the onesentence limit does not apply. You could, for example, say this:
"So far ST does not boil down to one single theory making definite quantitative predictions about future experiments. There are a number of different ST versions. But theorists have found that to make any version work they need to assume two things which the LHC can look for: socalled "supersymmetry" (abbr SUSY) and extra dimensions. SUSY just means that the known particles have some number of partners, in a definite pattern---these suspected partners have not yet shown up in the couple of decades they have been looked for. It would be a help for ST if evidence of either SUSY or extra dimensions showed up at LHC. But ST does not predict that LHC will find either, because so far it has been unable to say at what collision energy evidence might show up. So if LHC does not find evidence of SUSY or XD it wouldn't prove anything---the expected effects might still be waiting to appear at some higher collision energies which LHC cannot achieve."
Don't use any abbreviations besides "LHC" with an English teacher. I'm using abbreviations like ST, SUSY, XD to talk to you because I don't like typing and it makes it easier to read. But I advise you to write everything out, and if you give a talk, say everything: say "string theory" instead of ST, say "supersymmetry" instead of SUSY.