What causes a person to develop emotional maturity?

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The discussion centers on the factors that contribute to the development of emotional maturity, challenging the notion that suffering and hardship alone lead to maturity. Participants highlight that emotional maturity is not rigidly defined and can vary based on cultural perspectives. Key points include the role of socialization, the influence of upbringing and role models, and the importance of personal experiences and conscious efforts in shaping emotional responses. The conversation also touches on the impact of incarceration and extreme environments on emotional development, suggesting that exposure to diverse situations and healthy social interactions is crucial. Additionally, the discussion acknowledges that emotional maturity can manifest differently across cultures, emphasizing that maturity is subjective and context-dependent. Overall, the consensus is that emotional maturity is a complex interplay of nature, nurture, and individual choice, rather than a straightforward outcome of hardship.
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In this thread, I am not asking what emotional maturity is. I am asking what causes a person to develop emotional maturity. I used to think that suffering & hardship causes a person to develop emotional maturity. Then I read that incarceration or institutionalization can delay emotional maturity. Incarceration generally is a hardship. So I think that rules out the idea that hardship alone will automatically, on its own, cause a person to develop emotional maturity.

What causes a person to develop emotional maturity?
 
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You'll have to define what you mean by emotional maturity to talk about how it develops. Its not rigidly pre-defined for us.
 
Moved thread to General Discussion.

You could read Abraham Maslow on socialization (hierarchy of needs) for some ideas on where to go with the discussion.

https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html
 
jim mcnamara said:
Moved thread to General Discussion.

You could read Abraham Maslow on socialization (hierarchy of needs) for some ideas on where to go with the discussion.

https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html
Was thinking this also, with self actualization being at the top- knowing what you stand for, your worth, morals, and purpose.
As far as the emotional aspect of maturity, I would say that it still applies. If you know what's important to you, you will act in a way that benefits that worth.
 
bluemoonKY said:
In this thread, I am not asking what emotional maturity is. I am asking what causes a person to develop emotional maturity...

What causes a person to develop emotional maturity?
Mature: "having completed [or to complete] natural growth or development."

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/mature#h1
 
After reading countless books on topics encompassing Emotional Maturity (I call it, self-ownership). I would like to chip in my two pennies. I would describe 'emotional maturity' as:
"Ones ability to mindfully and objectively react to external stimuli (Pleasure or Pain) with resilience and self-growth in mind". - Thats not official in any way, purely based on my research and experiences. I also would like to hear what's your take on it.

In regards to how people develop this maturity. I believe its (Backed by research) down to an individual exposure to certain situations and social interactions. There is one quote that I really like "Adaptation rather than rationality animates change". - Social Adaptation Theory in Consumer Behaviour

I think of it this way, If you lock someone out from all external stimuli and only expose them to a certain thing. They can't do much about it as they don't know any better. This could be from food to something basic as how you travers (Move/Walk). - Research on "Genie Wiley" is interesting, she was locked away for I believe 13 or 14 years of her life.

So how does one develop it?

Well it could be what you read, watch or your social interactions. Example of certain mental maturity that is confined to only a certain demographic is the Bullet Ant ritual where "Boys" from the Satere Mawe tribe only become "Men" when they past the ritual. Then when spoken to, the "boys" only understood this as being the only way of being a man and doing things that men can do. Which in our social circles would be bizarre.

Now if you would like to develop your own emotional maturity and more, I would recommend "Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius. Really nice book if you want someone to burst your bubble. You will understand when Marcus starts referring to beings as sacks of rotting flesh and bone, that's only for starters. Another good book I would recommend is "Influence- The Psychology of Persuasion" by Robert B. Cialdini.

That is only scratching the surface but, I hope that gave you some food for thought :)
 
Deviation from norms in childhood development within a child's society or a crisis within a society can hinder emotional development. Many places differ. Two children can experience similar childhoods of struggle, but if those around the struggling child aren't experiencing similar events, then a cognitive dissociation from those around them may occur; essentially, preventing them from developing a similar theory of mind that enables them to connect, empathize, and simply function alongside others within their group. This is why we can find mentally healthy children in undeveloped nations undergo grueling experiences, while children in developed nations can experience only a fraction of that trauma, yet can begin to deviate both emotionally and cognitively from norms. In other words, when there is extreme inequality concerning basic survival and decency in a nation, children suffer. I might also add that there is no set definition on what constitutes maturity. It's a matter of perspective, I think. Being from an individualistic culture myself, I would say that I think that people from honor-based cultures are emotionally immature as a whole. The majority of the US prison system is filled with people that were raised in an honor-based culture within the US. I think that cursing and screaming at your boyfriend in a parking lot, as if he's killed someone, then recklessly speeding up near my child & I is incredibly emotionally immature. But, many in the US would disagree with me, and say it's perfectly normal to them.

Suffering and hardship would be a primary cause for emotional immaturity, not an outcome. Maturity from trauma is actually not typical. Sometimes, it breaks people. You have to remove the stimulus and cause of suffering firstly. The conditions thereafter would determine whether or not those learning experiences can be utilized later on. But, it is a very painful process and requires a person to transcend to a place of forgiveness and acknowledgment. The price is sometimes so high that they still cannot fit in when they do begin trying to catch up.
 
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I think it is achieved by doing self-reflective work, I have worked on myself for over 20 years and I believe I can now say I have reached emotional maturity. I had Adversive Childhood Experiences to work on.
 
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  • #11
Fervent Freyja said:
This is why we can find mentally healthy children in undeveloped nations undergo grueling experiences, while children in developed nations can experience only a fraction of that trauma, yet can begin to deviate both emotionally and cognitively from norms.

Children in developed nations can experience only a fraction of that trauma, yet can begin to deviate both emotionally and cognitively from norms in what way? Deviating to be more mature or less mature?
I might also add that there is no set definition on what constitutes maturity. It's a matter of perspective, I think. Being from an individualistic culture myself, I would say that I think that people from honor-based cultures are emotionally immature as a whole. The majority of the US prison system is filled with people that were raised in an honor-based culture within the US. I think that cursing and screaming at your boyfriend in a parking lot, as if he's killed someone, then recklessly speeding up near my child & I is incredibly emotionally immature. But, many in the US would disagree with me, and say it's perfectly normal to them.

The majority of the US prison system is filled with Americans. Isn't America considered to be an individualistic culture?

Fervent Freyja, you had a lot of interesting things to say, but you never really answered how a person develops emotional maturity.
 
  • #12
bluemoonKY said:
...
The verb form of the word is the act of achieving it, and the definition tells what the act is/how it is performed.
 
  • #13
Tracey3 said:
I would describe 'emotional maturity' as:
"Ones ability to mindfully and objectively react to external stimuli (Pleasure or Pain) with resilience and self-growth in mind".
I believe that statement to be a non-starter. Huge swaths of the human population do not respond at all objectively to external stimuli. To take my point of view further would require going off in religious and/or political directions that are not allowed on this forum, so I'll have to just leave it there.
 
  • #14
@Tracey3 - Lots of cultures have rites of passage. Kinaldaa is the one for Navajo women. Traditional Navajo culture is matrilineal. Anyway, because of a lack of definite boundaries between child -> adult in our society (other than legally mandated age values) other rites have evolved, example: 'beating in' a new member of a gang. The rite of passage is a trial, usually nasty, to prove your worth or mettle as an adult. Like you mentioned. Remove that and replace it with our culture and you get undefined boundaries because of no real change of perception of the person (See Cushing below). This has already happened to the Navajo. A small section of the population adheres to the old ways, most others are westernized and no longer speak Navajo well enough to function in an adult context. They cannot transition to adult and be accepted. Lose your language lose your culture.

This rite of passage requirement is not my concept, although I think it has some limited merit. The Navajo thing is my example - I lived on the Rez for years, left, and came back 30 years later to see a radically different culture.

Cushing - based on research in another cultural context:

See: Pameala Cushing (1999) Translating Transformation into Something Real (Rites of Passage), Pathways: Ontario Journal for Outdoor Education, Vol. 12, No. 1 Sept.-Nov; pp 26-30.
 
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  • #15
phinds said:
Huge swaths of the human population do not respond at all objectively to external stimuli.

I have never stated that emotional maturity is prevalent and/or common within the populous. I would argue that, millennials in particular are exhibiting strong indicators of narcism which isn't necessarily a contributor to developing emotional maturity.

To further back this up I will give a common example of emotional immaturity, grieving over passing away of someone. Firstly, crying and emotionality is normally to be expected initially as its one of many human coping mechanisms. Generally the next morning after such incident, physically the body is capable of operating nominally, however most people will grieve for long periods of time, mainly due to social norms and neural associations of pain if not grieving.

Thats explaining it in short but this is also why I refer to emotional maturity as 'Self-ownership'. Anyways I still would love to hear your point, as you might have some different insights or I'm overlooking something. I would be happy to hear you out over PM or alternative places :)

P.s. @jim mcnamara Thanks for the journal information, its an interesting read.
 
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  • #16
Tracey3 said:
I have never stated that emotional maturity is prevalent and/or common within the populous.
You're missing my point. Regardless of the % of the population that you consider emotionally mature, I find your statement that object responses to stimuli is a prerequisite for maturity to be wildly optimistic. I know LOTS of people whom I consider emotionally mature but they clearly do not respond objectively to a great many things. We all respond subjectively to many things, some more than others.
 
  • #17
phinds said:
I find your statement that object responses to stimuli is a prerequisite for maturity to be wildly optimistic.

Ahh right, ok well there is no solid marker for what's mature or not. However would you consider rephrasing it to use 'grounded'instead of 'objectively' as more appropriate? Then again I considered using 'Unbiased' but most of the subjective mind is a product of factual propositions which have been effected by our biases (Egocentric bias or even Cryptomnesia).
 
  • #18
All of the terms you are using are so not-scientifically-meaningful that I don't find the conversation helpful.
 
  • #19
Pythagorean said:
You'll have to define what you mean by emotional maturity to talk about how it develops. Its not rigidly pre-defined for us.

emotional maturity: to manage one's emotions rather than let one's emotions control one's behavior.
 
  • #20
bluemoonKY said:
emotional maturity: to manage one's emotions rather than let one's emotions control one's behavior.
So psychopaths are immature but sociopaths are mature. I'm not in favor.
 
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  • #21
phinds said:
So psychopaths are immature but sociopaths are mature. I'm not in favor.

How in the nation did you interpret what I said to mean that?

Psychopathy and sociopathy are the same thing.

Sociopathy/psychopathy is not having a conscience. Why did you even mention psychopathy/sociopathy? This has nothing to do with sociopathy/psychopathy.

If you are able to manage your emotions as opposed to letting your emotions control your behavior, that is a sign of maturity. For instance, if you are angry about something, but you manage your anger as opposed to throwing a temper tantrum, that is a sign of emotional maturity.
 
  • #22
Pythagorean said:
You'll have to define what you mean by emotional maturity to talk about how it develops. Its not rigidly pre-defined for us.
Thank gosh for this comment. Emotional maturity is arbitrary and not easily defined.
 
  • #23
bluemoonKY said:
How in the nation did you interpret what I said to mean that?

Psychopathy and sociopathy are the same thing.

Sociopathy/psychopathy is not having a conscience. Why did you even mention psychopathy/sociopathy? This has nothing to do with sociopathy/psychopathy.

If you are able to manage your emotions as opposed to letting your emotions control your behavior, that is a sign of maturity. For instance, if you are angry about something, but you manage your anger as opposed to throwing a temper tantrum, that is a sign of emotional maturity.

They are not the same thing, a psychopath does not feel any empathy and is just born like that while a sociopath is created due to physical abuse or emotional trauma (they can still feel empathy). It is a nature vs nuture difference, resulting in different patterns of behaviour. Given your definition of "emotional maturity" ("to manage one's emotions rather than let one's emotions control one's behavior"), a psychopath would be one of the best at controlling emotions and a sociopath would be one of the worst..
 
  • #24
mister mishka said:
They are not the same thing, a psychopath does not feel any empathy and is just born like that while a sociopath is created due to physical abuse or emotional trauma (they can still feel empathy). It is a nature vs nuture difference, resulting in different patterns of behaviour.

I've read multiple books on sociopathy/psychopathy including Without Conscience by Robert O'Hare and The Mask of Sanity by Hervey Cleckley and The Sociopath Next Door by Martha Stout and Confessions of a Sociopath by M.E. Thomas. The authors of all four of those books use the words sociopathy and psychopathy interchangeably. O'Hare, Cleckley, Stout, and m.e. Thomas all unanimously claim that sociopaths/psychopaths don't have consciences because of both genetics AND environment. In other words, O'Hare, Cleckley, Stout, and m.e. Thomas all unanimously claim that sociopaths/psychopaths don't have consciences because of both nature and nurture.

What is your source for your assertion that a psychopath is born that way and a sociopath is made that way due to environment? Do you believe that a sociopath is created strictly due to physical abuse or emotional trauma, or do you think that sociopathy also has genetic causes? What is your source that a sociopath can feel empathy? Do you believe that a sociopaths have consciences?
 
  • #25
So you are saying that you not only have to be born with it, but also to be in certain environment for a sociopath / psychopath to arise? Of course sometimes it could be both, but are you saying it is always both?
 
  • #26
mister mishka said:
So you are saying that you not only have to be born with it, but also to be in certain environment for a sociopath / psychopath to arise? Of course sometimes it could be both, but are you saying it is always both?

mister mishka, as I recollect, the four books I read about sociopathy/psychopathy did not clarify if the causes of sociopathy/psychopathy are ALWAYS both genetics and environment. The four books I read just said what I wrote in post #24: Sociopathy/psychopathy is caused by both genetics and environmental factors (without saying if both genetic & environmental factors caused sociopathy/psychopathy in all sociopaths/psychopaths).
 
  • #27
I'm afraid I don't have any references to support what I'm saying.
Still, I'm interested in this thread, and I hope you will bear with me when I try to share my ideas.

As I see it, a child is not 'emotionally mature' because (s)he hasn't learned to deal with most situations yet.
A child will be confronted with a new situation and not know what to do.
Consequently (s)he will start to cry, or look for help, or make a bad call, or some such.
Maturity means that you've encountered sufficient situations and have learned to deal with them one way or another.
To the point that even if a new situation comes up that is unfamiliar, that previous experiences will help you to deal with it.
 
  • #28
bluemoonKY said:
mister mishka, as I recollect, the four books I read about sociopathy/psychopathy did not clarify if the causes of sociopathy/psychopathy are ALWAYS both genetics and environment. The four books I read just said what I wrote in post #24: Sociopathy/psychopathy is caused by both genetics and environmental factors (without saying if both genetic & environmental factors caused sociopathy/psychopathy in all sociopaths/psychopaths).

Yes well then that makes my point, that there is some distinction between a sociopath and a psychopath. Of course this is not a hard science and there will be varying degrees of each depending on the person, but it will either be mostly caused by genetics or by environmental factors.
 
  • #29
Regarding sociopaths and psychopaths I just want to jump in and say that those terms are somewhat old/outdated. The clinical term is ASPD (antisocial personality disorder), which is one of the four similar disorders in the cluster B personality disorders. People in this cluster are not only emotionally immature, they can even be emotionally deficient. On an psychological and emotional level, they are often compared to children and toddlers, even though they are adults.

EDIT: Outwardly, many of them can appear as pretty normal, mature and in control of themselves. But internally, psychologically, they are not. And their masks slip from time to time, often to people that are close to them.
 
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  • #30
I am surprised that no one has brought up the link between autism and developmental issues with emotional maturity. Typically an autistic persons age appropriate emotional responses lag that of a non autistic person. Emotional responses change as we age eventually and usually plateauing at what we would term as normal rational adult response resulting in normal satisfactory interpersonal relationships and normal responses to the various emotional situations. (of course within "normally" acceptable variations).
 
  • #31
mister mishka said:
Yes well then that makes my point, that there is some distinction between a sociopath and a psychopath. Of course this is not a hard science and there will be varying degrees of each depending on the person, but it will either be mostly caused by genetics or by environmental factors.

Psychopathy is considered to be a more extreme cases of sociopathy. All Psychos are Socios but not all Socios are Psychos.

Sociopaths have an easier time blending into society among "normal" people. Psychopaths have a harder time faking it. There are a lot of people who have the socio disorder and do not commit violent crimes. On the other hand "approximately 93% of Psychopaths are in the criminal justice system."

And sobering fact I read; a lot of people with the disorder(s) tend to gravitate towards certain jobs: police officers, CEOs of major companies, chefs(and I wouldn't be surprised if my chef instructor in college is one LOL), lawyers, journalists, surgeons, media, sales person, civil servant, and clergy.

https://www.healthyplace.com/person...sychopath-vs-sociopath-what-s-the-difference/

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.fo...the-top-10-jobs-that-attract-psychopaths/amp/
 
  • #32
Emotional maturity is usually achieved by the individual in question. I say this because, as you mentioned in your post, there are many people who undergo hardship but come out defiant, rude and quite emotionally unstable. On the other hand, there are many who use their traumas to better understand themselves and others which result in a kind, helpful and level-headed adult. I was a victim of many, many different traumatic experiences since a young age and thanks to this I have become a beacon for many of those in need. I have met a vast amount of people who have undergone trauma(s) and the result of which differs depending on their personality (nurture v.s. nature--you decide) and ability to learn from mistakes; therefore, I believe emotional maturity is a cognitive choice and requires quite a bit of willpower, knowledge, and sometimes even therapy/self-help books. :dog:
 
  • #33
Lillie said:
therefore, I believe emotional maturity is a cognitive choice and requires quite a bit of willpower, knowledge, and sometimes even therapy/self-help books. :dog:

Translation: You are saying that a person's choosing to behavior in emotionally mature ways is what develops emotional maturity.

Lillie, you're really the only person who answered the question of this thread. Everyone else just went on tangents.
 
  • #34
bluemoonKY said:
Lillie, you're really the only person who answered the question of this thread. Everyone else just went on tangents.
Ok, here's my two (or four) cents :smile:...
bluemoonKY said:
What causes a person to develop emotional maturity?

I do think it is both nature (genetics) and nurture (upbringing). I do think reasonably emotionally mature parents or role models need to be present, since children very early on learn (and imitate) from the people that are close to them. Later on, to develop healthy social skills with your peers, there need to be healthy friends. And this goes on into adulthood.

Unhealthy* parents/role models and unhealthy circumstances can (and often do) result in unhealthy children who become unhealthy adults. Not all the time, though.

*) EDIT: What I mean by "unhealthy" is socially/psychologically unhealthy.
 
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  • #35
Experience is what causes maturity?
 
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  • #36
bluemoonKY said:
Translation: You are saying that a person's choosing to behavior in emotionally mature ways is what develops emotional maturity.

Lillie, you're really the only person who answered the question of this thread. Everyone else just went on tangents.
I should have simplified it initially. I'm sorry. I tend to be a bit long-winded in explanations to avoid misunderstandings (usually it causes more!).

rootone said:
Experience is what causes maturity?
I would have to disagree with this. Many people who turn out to abuse drugs or continue the cycle of abuse have experienced many, many things; however, they continue to act in immature and selfish ways. It's a conscious effort and begins with sheer willpower.

DennisN said:
Ok, here's my two (or four) cents :smile:...I do think it is both nature (genetics) and nurture (upbringing). I do think reasonably emotionally mature parents or role models need to be present, since children very early on learn (and imitate) from the people that are close to them. Later on, to develop healthy social skills with your peers, there need to be healthy friends. And this goes on into adulthood.

Unhealthy* parents/role models and unhealthy circumstances can (and often do) result in unhealthy children who become unhealthy adults. Not all the time, though.

*) EDIT: What I mean by "unhealthy" is socially/psychologically unhealthy.
As far as I agree with you on certain points, it can still be looked at as a conscious effort (especially as you stated that some that do undergo trauma end up fine). I had quite a troubled upbringing composed of physical and emotional abuse, neglect, and other... heavier topics that I will not go into. For a short period, I was very lost and quite afraid of the real world--even the people I had considered close to me were not healthy for me. Thanks to these experiences, I was able to take what had happened to me and translate it to a law of how not to be. And, yes, many people who undergo similar to what I have end up being terrible people, but there are terrible people who have had a seemingly normal upbringing as well. I believe that if you truly wish to mature and grow, you will.

Edit: My psychiatrist is hesitant to diagnose me so early, but he thinks I have a personality disorder known as "avoidant" possibly caused by trauma. I did not know this prior but have read multiple books on how to speak to others, how to be amiable and friendly despite the anxiety, and how to control your emotions (I used to be a rather angry individual, though the anger was directed inward rather than outward). After thinking for a moment, both upbringing and a conscious effort to become a mature individual are both valid. Meaning, there are multiple ways to mature and not one path is the correct one.
 
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  • #37
Lillie said:
I had quite a troubled upbringing composed of physical and emotional abuse, neglect, and other... heavier topics that I will not go into.
I am sorry.
Lillie said:
but have read multiple books on how to speak to others, how to be amiable and friendly despite the anxiety, and how to control your emotions.
If you have not heard about this book, I'd like to mention it:
Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving: A guide and map for recovering from childhood trauma by Pete Walker. From what I know from people who are knowledgeable about childhood traumas and psychology, it is widely regarded as a great book on these things.
 
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  • #38
bluemoonKY said:
Lillie, you're really the only person who answered the question of this thread. Everyone else just went on tangents.

FWIW -
@bluemoonKY - That is because there is no ONE inclusively valid answer for humans. Gravity works identically everywhere on Earth. What is normal mature behavior is not the same everywhere, it does not play the same everywhere on Earth. Lillie did answer the question in a limited context. This why the "define maturity" posts popped up.

Example: I lived and worked on the Navajo Reservation a long time ago - taught at a College of Nursing. The PHS (IHS) mental health staff from back East there had big problems helping Navajo patients. This is because what was normal behavior for "mature" traditional Navajos is not the same as it is for us Westerners. Some aspects of well-adjusted behavior do not match up. At all. So the mental health professionals were kind of stymied sometimes. The ones who fared the best were Navajos themselves with college educations, who spoke Navajo.

[aside or "tangent" to help you understand]
It is almost impossible for an adult English speaker to become fully proficient in that language. There are many languages with phonemes (language sounds) we cannot hear because we lost the ability as small children, sounds that were not part of the language our parents spoke. Navajo has two tones. And. Length, pitch and nasalization are phonemic. English does not do this. AFAIK the number of phonemes in Navajo is disputed by linguists. Estimates are all way larger than English.
Try this page on children hearing all phonemes, ones adults can no longer hear:
https://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Psycholinguistics/Development_of_Speech_Perception

There is one Anglo man that Navajos considered as speaking really good Navajo - Irvy Goosen, a Mennonite missionary who lived in the reservation for most of his life - he and Ellavina Perkins, a native speaker with excellent English skills, created the first reasonably complete book on the subject: Goossen, Irvy W. (1995) Dine Bizaad: Speak, Read, Write Navajo. Northern Arizona University.
[/aside]

Culture can be thought of as based in your primary language. Cultural norms define maturity. Lose your language as a people, lose your culture. Which is why a lot of native peoples in many places have taken steps to maintain traditional language. Gaelic in Ireland, for example, worked out well.
 
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  • #39
bluemoonKY said:
What causes a person to develop emotional maturity?
bluemoonKY said:
emotional maturity: to manage one's emotions rather than let one's emotions control one's behavior.
If you consider physical maturity, one could say that you have reach it when your body is fully adapted to respond to your environment. A deer is physically mature when it has the capacity to outrun its predators, a lion is physically mature when it is strong enough to hunt its preys (Of course they are other points as well, like the ability to reproduce itself and such).

So, according to your definition, emotional maturity would be reached when one has control over his or her emotions in a way that he or she is fully adapted to its environment. Enough fear to avoid bad situation without reaching panic, enough anger to defend oneself without turning into rage.

bluemoonKY said:
I am asking what causes a person to develop emotional maturity. I used to think that suffering & hardship causes a person to develop emotional maturity. Then I read that incarceration or institutionalization can delay emotional maturity.

Based on my previous statement, emotional maturity have a lot to do with hope and the environment you are accustomed to.

You stated «one's emotions control one's behavior» like it is a bad thing. It's not. If one is confronted to a bad and unknown situation that seems will never end (no matter how you runaway or fight back, the threat seems to never diminish), all hope of better days is gone, you have nothing to lose and panic or rage appears. At this point, your body doesn't need to think, it needs to react quickly.

When you overreact to a non-threatening situation, that is when you are emotional immature, when you cannot adjust your emotional response to the situation. This is because you can't see any way of getting into a better situation. It's being hopeless. Having no hope when a lion jumps on someone who never encountered one is reasonable; Having no hope when you don't get the exact change when you pay for your coffee is not. But someone who have been raised around lions, can know what to do when one goes after him or her and can react in a controlled fashion.

For someone to be emotionally mature, one needs to know how to evaluate the threat level of surrounding situations and how to react to these situations to make them better. Experience is certainly one way, but if one's have suffered to a point that he or she cannot see any hope of getting out of a bad situation, one will have difficulties reaching emotional maturity.

That is why telling scary stories to kids is a good way of teaching them how to react to fear (It's easy to show them there are no monsters under the bed). But telling scary stories is not enough, you need to teach them how to handle those fears. And you gradually increase the threat level of the situations they are dealing with, always while teaching a method on how to deal with that situation. If you go too fast and/or the kid fails too often, he or she will go in panic or rage mode quickly and that could be very difficult to handle when the kid is not a kid anymore.
 
  • #40
bluemoonKY said:
In this thread, I am not asking what emotional maturity is. I am asking what causes a person to develop emotional maturity. I used to think that suffering & hardship causes a person to develop emotional maturity. Then I read that incarceration or institutionalization can delay emotional maturity. Incarceration generally is a hardship. So I think that rules out the idea that hardship alone will automatically, on its own, cause a person to develop emotional maturity.

What causes a person to develop emotional maturity?

Hello
I really enjoyed the post. Mostly, I saw the post about studies and I am happy that you are interested in talking about humans behaviour changes.Basically, emotional maturity linked to depression and anxiety but it also depends on your living style as well.It also caused due to your surroundings. As you know depression and anxiety plays a role in emotional maturity so I want to discuss what is the role surroundings and living style matters.

How living style and surroundings matters in developing emotional maturity?

Sometimes people face emotional incidents in their life and get lessons from that. Few people take such incidents in positive manner and with time they start observing humans and act accordingly. Similarly, such incidents impact hard on few people because they don't have much patience. In a nutshell, it depends on each and every things you faced in your daily life and how early people deal with it. Few people become responsible and few take things non seriously that's why their maturity level would not increase with their respective age and body appearance So, it's not depends on age or any kind of stupid factors.

"Human takes time to perceive thing and set mind to behave accordingly further".

Thanks
 
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