What Do American Girls Look for in a Man?

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AI Thread Summary
The discussion revolves around the question of what American women look for in men, highlighting the diversity of preferences and behaviors among women. It emphasizes that not all American women share the same values or customs, with some adhering to traditional views on relationships while others embrace more liberal lifestyles. The conversation touches on potential taboos, such as discussing sensitive topics like abortion or gender roles, which may not be well-received. Humor, respect, and good listening skills are identified as universally appreciated traits, while the importance of personal hygiene and physical appearance is also acknowledged. The dialogue humorously critiques the lack of female input in the discussion, suggesting that men are attempting to define women's preferences without sufficient understanding. Overall, the thread illustrates the complexity of dating norms and expectations in American culture, underscoring that individual preferences vary widely.
  • #201
fi said:
How's Sunny Uluru today?
As far as I know, it's still there where you left it. :biggrin:
 
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  • #202
TheStatutoryApe said:
Same here. My mum and grandmothers and aunts all like to refer to "the girls". I have avoided mentioning it but there is another term that many women don't like that I have a tendency to use, mostly because of the people I am around. All of the women I have dated use it, my mom and aunts, even the majority of the various women I have been around socially use it, younger and older. This would be the infamous "chick(s)". Maybe it's a Southern California thing, the only women I have ever seen take offense to it have been from else where I believe.

Really? I know far more women who really take major offense at the term "chick." I've never heard another woman use that term, other than to say, "Can you believe that jerk just called me 'chick?'"

Moonie, when I talk about the females at my work I refer to them as girls because they are, most of them are between the ages of 18 and 20. At work and in a professional capacity some of my co-workers, and bosses, will refer to them as girls, though I will generally refer to them as "young women" or "young ladies". When I write my reports it is invariably the term "female" that I use. It definitely depends on the context. Russ and I both agree with you about professionalism.
Hmm...yeah, I think when I was in that age range, "girl" was okay sometimes. That was pretty much when in some contexts I'd use "women" and others I'd switch back to "girls," sort of that transition into adulthood thing (or "gals" worked because the 18-20 males were the "guys"; of course in college, we also had the "sorority girls" and "frat boys"). By the time I was in my mid-20's though, the women were women and the men were men. I really can't think of any situation where I would use the term "girl" to refer to someone over 21 or so unless I was wholly unimpressed with them...perhaps I'd call someone a girl if they were the sort who looks all pink and fluffy and seems to have pink fluff for brains too; Paris Hilton might still be a "girl." But I'm certainly not being nice by saying that.
 
  • #203
Moonbear said:
Quite frankly, I'm not fond of any terms of endearment, but my last boyfriend got away with calling me "blondie." "Honey" or "sweetheart" were not well-received...

So Moonie is out of the question?

Ohh-kay...<slowly backs away>
 
  • #204
The_Professional said:
So Moonie is out of the question?

Ohh-kay...<slowly backs away>

TheStatutoryApe already asked permission for that one. Since it's not the generic, "I don't want to be bothered remembering your name" term, it's okay. Besides, nicknames are different from terms of endearment. Though, I'm still finding it amusing that my nickname has a nickname. :smile:
 
  • #205
chick? Ohhhh. Not since I was in my teens. :devil: Same fate as saying "babe".

chickie babe will get you an even slower, more painful death.
 
  • #206
Evo said:
chickie babe will get you an even slower, more painful death.
How do you suppress the reflexive response so you can inflict a slower, more painful death? That one calls for my handy dandy elastrator. :devil:
 
  • #207
Evo said:
chick? Ohhhh. Not since I was in my teens. :devil: Same fate as saying "babe".

chickie babe will get you an even slower, more painful death.
I'm always careful to adjust my language to the people I am around. It wasn't until I was 22 or 23 that I cussed in front of my mum, and she cussed in front of me quite often by that time. Even then it was only because I was really angry with a lawyer. :devil:
 
  • #208
Evo said:
chick? Ohhhh. Not since I was in my teens. :devil: Same fate as saying "babe".

I love chex! especially in the morning. I usually eat them with milk, they come in rice, corn and sometimes wheat. They're delicious.
 
  • #209
So I got a chance to test the theory earlier than expected last night. When I got home from the gym, I had a message waiting from one of my female friends that she wanted to hang out, drink, and play poker last night. When I got out of the shower, she called again, so I answered the phone by saying "Hey, girl, you're really ready to get your drink on, aren't you?" Her response was a giggle, but she was calling back so soon to postpone it until tonight. I will conduct further experiements...

Thinking about it more, though I've never referred to the girl I'm dating (sorry, saying "woman" sounds too formal - I just can't do it, even though she's 30) as a "girl" as a term of endearment, I probably have as a familiar/informal reference (ie, "you're a nice girl and I'd like to see you again"). I'm not sure though, so I'll try it next time I talk to her or see her. Since she's 5'1" and slightly sensitive about people thinking she's younger than she is, I won't call her a "cute girl" though (that is a phrase I use every now and then). That's a just in case thing though - I'm slightly sensitive about the same thing (once when I was around 24, I had a bartender start referring to me as "Doogie Howser" and my friends got years of mileage out of that one), but I'd never misinterpret a girl referring to me as a "cute boy" as being an insult.
 
  • #210
Evo said:
chick? Ohhhh. Not since I was in my teens. :devil: Same fate as saying "babe".

chickie babe will get you an even slower, more painful death.
"Chick" is a term that guys should only use around other guys, but I've found that a lot of chicks like being referred to as "babe". :devil: And the two girls I'm good friends with refer to me as "babe" all the time. I only rarely refer to them as "chicks" ('either of you chicks need another beer?').
 
  • #211
wolram said:
when i went to appleton, wisconsin i did nt have time to socialize, and you
wont believe, the lady at the hotel check in was english.

you were in Appleton, Wisconsin? I bet there is only a handful of people on here who have heard or been to Appleton and the amazing thing is one of them seems to be English. (I would be willing to wager the vast majority of the others who have been there are from the greater Green Bay area.)

Small world I guess. I grew up in De Pere- a suburb of Green Bay and I know the Appleton area pretty well. Too funny.
 
  • #212
russ_watters said:
"Chick" is a term that guys should only use around other guys, but I've found that a lot of chicks like being referred to as "babe". :devil: And the two girls I'm good friends with refer to me as "babe" all the time. I only rarely refer to them as "chicks" ('either of you chicks need another beer?').

Do Patty and I have to turn the heat back up in Philly again? :devil:
 
  • #213
In all fairness to Russ, I reflect upon two things.

1. Russ has almost entered the 30-something period, and presumably dates women near his age, maybe older, and quite possibly slightly younger. While trying not to generalize, there does seem to be generational (and perhaps geographical) differences. The sensitivities of women in 30's, 40's, 50's and older, seem to be different than those of women in teens and 20's. I have seen it and women of different ages have made this observation. However, that does not give license to men of any age to use terms of endearment inappropriately, and by that I mean, men should not be familiar with those women with whom they are not.

2. The use of terms such as "babe" or "baby", has been ubiquitous in popular culture, and we are all aware how popular culture influences behavior. For example, 2nd song on Led Zepplin's first ablum, "Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You", and I distinctly remember a Jimi Hendrix song in which he sings "Hey babe." Again, this does not give license to men to use terms of endearment inappropriately.

The point at hand is "how to determine what is appropriate".

Simple - a man can simply ask a woman with whom he has contact!

BTW - If I used 'baby' in addressing my wife, she'd punch my lights out! :biggrin:

Actually she has told me not to use it in the past. The exception is 'poor baby' when she is ill or feeling poorly. Even then I rarely use that expression, even though she has said it is OK to do so in that circumstance.

I usually limit my use to 'Sweetheart'.

Oh, and I never make assumptions about what my wife is thinking - even after knowing her 25 years!
 
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  • #214
Astronuc said:
1. Russ just entered the 30-something period...
Hey, take that back! I'm 29, damnit!
 
  • #215
russ_watters said:
Hey, take that back! I'm 29, damnit!
:smile: I was counting time in gestation. :biggrin: Some people are so sensitive about their age. :biggrin:

Sorry, I jumped the gun. I was thinking of another thread in the past where you probably mentioned 'almost 30'.

Well, you're almost there.

Anyway, the point I made holds - younger women seem to have different senstivities - at least that has been my direct experience. I suspect however, that with age, sensitivities change.

So, how's the experiment coming?
 
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  • #216
Astronuc said:
:smile: I was counting time in gestation. :biggrin: Some people are so sensitive about their age. :biggrin:
I always hear women are so sensitive about their ages and they never tell the truth about it! but base on my experiment men are worse in this case! :wink:
 
  • #217
Lisa! said:
I always hear women are so sensitive about their ages and they never tell the truth about it! but base on my experiment men are worse in this case! :wink:
At risk of generalizing, I suspect only superficial people lie about their age. Some may choose not to disclose their age, for a variety of reasons (including that it's rude to ask them in the first place), but to outright lie seems superficial. I have no problem sharing my age, as long as I can remember what it is...keeps changing every year, and when the years start going by faster, it gets harder to keep track!
 
  • #218
moonbear, that's not true...what about teenagers trying to buy alcohol?
 
  • #219
yourdadonapogostick said:
moonbear, that's not true...what about teenagers trying to buy alcohol?

Okay, superficial or criminal. How's that? :biggrin:


(Okay, Russ, I heard that sigh of relief that the discussion is turning to age now.)[/size] :-p
 
  • #220
better...a little bit better...
 
  • #221
So, should we go back to talking about olives? We only nauseated Dex on that topic I think. :biggrin: :smile:
 
  • #222
brewnog said:
Just stick
after everything you want to quote,

And stick
before!

You can also put
whoever you'd like to quote said:
in the first one, to quote whoever you'd like to quote.

Thanks, and thanks Evo. I jumped into this thread because I love the cultural differences I meet here in London. Its a wonderful place.
 
  • #223
Norman said:
you were in Appleton, Wisconsin? I bet there is only a handful of people on here who have heard or been to Appleton and the amazing thing is one of them seems to be English. (I would be willing to wager the vast majority of the others who have been there are from the greater Green Bay area.)

Small world I guess. I grew up in De Pere- a suburb of Green Bay and I know the Appleton area pretty well. Too funny.

May be you can help me remember where the James river factory is?
its 20yrs or more since my visit, i remember one of the guys offered
to take me fishing at the week end :biggrin: but i had to work
 
  • #224
Evo said:
chick? Ohhhh. Not since I was in my teens. :devil: Same fate as saying "babe".

chickie babe will get you an even slower, more painful death.

Death by the hands of Evo, What a way to go :biggrin: i have never heard
a woman called a," chickie babe", May be that's an american term.
Is Moonbear still about? The ladies at the factory where i work like to be called girls but they are a wicked lot.
 
  • #226
russ_watters said:
On an utterly unrelated note, has anyone seen today's Dilbert?

Poor Dilbert, he has to put up with so much.
 
  • #227
russ_watters said:
On an utterly unrelated note, has anyone seen today's Dilbert?
:smile: -Er, I mean- I don't get it. :rolleyes:
 
  • #228
Evo said:
chick? Ohhhh. Not since I was in my teens. :devil: Same fate as saying "babe".
A guy I know always calls me chicky (or chickita) or babe, sometimes honeybunch or sweety :smile:, he's a 'homey' and longtime friend so I just go with the flow.

Today a guy said "WOOOOOOOOW NICE BABE!" after my bf showed a pic of me :smile:, I thought it was really funny, but someone saying that to my face certainly wouldn't get much respect from me.
 
  • #229
Monique said:
A guy I know always calls me chicky (or chickita) or babe, sometimes honeybunch or sweety :smile:, he's a 'homey' and longtime friend so I just go with the flow.

Today a guy said "WOOOOOOOOW NICE BABE!" after my bf showed a pic of me :smile:, I thought it was really funny, but someone saying that to my face certainly wouldn't get much respect from me.

You females, some times you are just so hard to understand, one minute
your bitting our heads off, or planning a slow death for us, then you are
all nice :biggrin:
 
  • #230
wolram said:
May be you can help me remember where the James river factory is?
its 20yrs or more since my visit, i remember one of the guys offered
to take me fishing at the week end :biggrin: but i had to work

Well being a good Green Bay kid, a lot of my family worked in the paper mills and I did too for summer work during my undergrad. James River was bought by Fort Howard Paper to form Fort James Paper about 10 (?) years ago. They are now based out of Green Bay.
Cheers,
Ryan
 
  • #231
Norman said:
Well being a good Green Bay kid, a lot of my family worked in the paper mills and I did too for summer work during my undergrad. James River was bought by Fort Howard Paper to form Fort James Paper about 10 (?) years ago. They are now based out of Green Bay.
Cheers,
Ryan

Thankyou Ryan.
 
  • #232
russ_watters said:
On an utterly unrelated note, has anyone seen today's Dilbert?
:smile: :smile:
Unrelated, huh? :-p
 
  • #233
I remember the good old Spring days.. when we talked about beavers and merkins.. now all we do is some interpersonal mumbo jumbo and how to dress and talk in front of girls... sad, really really sad what summer does to the hormones :-p
 
  • #234
cronxeh said:
I remember the good old Spring days.. when we talked about beavers and merkins.. now all we do is some interpersonal mumbo jumbo and how to dress and talk in front of girls... sad, really really sad what summer does to the hormones :-p

Okay, nobody's interested in olives. How about pickles? I like a really crunchy garlic pickle. :-p
 
  • #235
The deli kind, right?

Olives are great. Best kind is a mix - some marinated in oil have to be in the mix - and if you get them at a tapas bar even better. Side order of sausages and prosciutto. Yum! A little bruschetta would be good too.
 
  • #236
Moonbear said:
Okay, nobody's interested in olives. How about pickles? I like a really crunchy garlic pickle. :-p

I Love pickles, ginger and chili is yummy
 
  • #237
Moonbear said:
Okay, nobody's interested in olives. How about pickles? I like a really crunchy garlic pickle. :-p
I like black olives on pizza with other toppings.

I use chopped black olives and tomatoes in zucchini boats.
 
  • #238
Astro, you should nt play with your food.

I use chopped black olives and tomatoes in zucchini boats.
 
  • #239
pickles, ginger, pickled ginger,chili, rocket, corrianer and water cress ...mmmm
 
  • #240
pattylou said:
Olives are great. Best kind is a mix - some marinated in oil have to be in the mix - and if you get them at a tapas bar even better. Side order of sausages and prosciutto. Yum! A little bruschetta would be good too.
Yep - I'll go for that. :-p

pattylou, you have a tapas bar nearby?

Bringing this thread back OT -

"Don't speak to anyone with your mouth full (of food of course)" - at least not on the first date. :biggrin:
 
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  • #241
Mmmmmm...Tapas. My favorite restaurant of all time is a tapas place in NYC. Damn I miss that place.
 
  • #242
Astronuc said:
pattylou, you have a tapas bar nearby?

Well, I live in California. We're atypical. I'm sure you've heard. :biggrin:

Tapas bars are big in San Francisco, there are a few near me (I'm outside LA) but it would be a drive and an event to go to one; and there are a few more in San Diego.

We've got sushi bars, too. Neat hunh? I don't recall any vegemite or other Aussie cuisine anywhere, however.

But I did catch a show on foodtv where they were making kangaroo sandwiches. :cry: How... How could you?? Poor little roo!
 
  • #243
the best restaurant in chicago is Shwarma King...mmmm, shwarma
 
  • #244
Hey - if you're in Chicago check out Topolabampos. And the Frontera grill.

The chef's cookbook is our bible on mexican cuisine. Excellent. Totally outstanding.
 
  • #245
you may be tempted to go to Uno's...don't! they have the worst pizza...go to Giordano's(sp?)
 
  • #246
FredGarvin said:
Mmmmmm...Tapas. My favorite restaurant of all time is a tapas place in NYC. Damn I miss that place.
Address please!

pattylou said:
Well, I live in California. We're atypical. I'm sure you've heard. :biggrin:
I've noticed. :biggrin:

pattylou said:
Tapas bars are big in San Francisco, there are a few near me (I'm outside LA) but it would be a drive and an event to go to one; and there are a few more in San Diego.
I know of one near Del Mar north of SD - but it closed. :frown: Do you know of others. I get to SD quite a lot.

pattylou said:
We've got sushi bars, too. Neat hunh? I don't recall any vegemite or other Aussie cuisine anywhere, however.
I have to travel with my own supply. :biggrin: I also like Marmite.

pattylou said:
But I did catch a show on foodtv where they were making kangaroo sandwiches. How... How could you?? Poor little roo!
I had roo in Preston, England. Very good, very gamey and very chewy. :biggrin: In fact, it's the toughest meat I've had.
 
  • #247
LOL.

Yes, there is a Tapas bar in the center of San Diego - with Flamenco dancing downstairs. I'l need to surf for it - hang on -

http://uk.holidaysguide.yahoo.com/p-travelguide-161119-sevilla_restaurant_tapas_bar_san_diego-i

Sevilla. We were quite drunk when we went, and I don't remember much. LOL. I think it was good - except the Sangria was too sweet.
 
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  • #248
I don't recall any vegemite or other Aussie cuisine anywhere, however. [/QUOTE]

Vegemite is readily available 'round these parts. So is American peanut butter. Must thank the American shopper at Waitrose who jumped in and saved me from a near purchase of English peanut butter when we first arrived here.


I had roo in Preston, England. Very good, very gamey and very chewy. In fact, it's the toughest meat I've had. - astro

Don't let anyone tell you that Crocodile is nice, either
 
  • #249
vegemite is the nastiest stuff ever. iirc, it is yeast extract?
 
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  • #250
yourdadonapogostick said:
vegemite is the nastiest stuff ever. iirc, it is yeast extract?

Yes, yeast extract, salt(and lots of it),potassium chloride, malt extract; that sort of thing.
 

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