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When is it time to give up?

  1. May 21, 2008 #1


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    Has it ever happened to you that you want something so badly but as much as you try you can't get it? I sometimes get annoyed by myself when I see that I almost never lose my interest in some paricular things, goals, and therefore I never give up...It sounds like you are just making a mistake over and over again and you don't learn any lesson form your mistakes. I mean when you can't get what you want after several attempts, maybe there's a problem with your goal. Maybe your interest in that partcular thing has no realistic and logical base and it doesn't really suit your talents, capablities and your true interests, so although you think you have done your best but the fact is that you've not tried as much as needed.
    You know sometimes I think I have no real interest in science and engineering. I've been interested in intelligent people whole my life and though of them as the coolest people in the world. And heaven knows that most of intelligent person are into mathematics and physics! And perhaps that's why I decided to study math and physics related subject. And perhaps that's why I'm not so successful academicly. I sometimes think that I could have been a very successful and useful person if I had chosen to study social sciences and stuff like that.
    I sometimes even think that my friend couldn't be the right person for me. Perhaps I'm just continue my relationship with him because he seems to be an intelligent person.
  2. jcsd
  3. May 21, 2008 #2
    I think I heard cyrus is free
  4. May 21, 2008 #3
    I think we have discussed motivation = desire * feasibility earlier. So if feasibility approaches zero, it may indeed be time to reconsider.

    So if you're interested in intelligent people, most exact scientists don't seem to share that priority. There must be specialities within psychology, sociology or even history and philosophy to study all about the why and the how and the evolvement of people in science.

    Wasn't Marlon free too?
  5. May 21, 2008 #4
    I think Evo is free too
  6. May 21, 2008 #5


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    Evo is not "free" - she likes to travel and stuff - high maintenance.
  7. May 21, 2008 #6
    I think one of the hardest things in the world is to know your interests and to figure out what sort of studies or job would be fulfilling. I suspect that at some point in your life you've certainly felt a sincere interest in science and engineering - but people's priorities and interests change. So don't be so hard on yourself.

    The company of people in physics are a big part of why I enjoy physics too. And sometimes it's easy to get discouraged because in science and engineering there are always going to lots of people who are extremely bright. It's good to remember that there is a lot more to success in life than being a star student.

    I'm not sure it's ever a good idea to like someone because they *seem* to be intelligent. But I bet there are lots of other reasons you like your friend. Is he handsome? Charming? A good cook? (If he's not a good cook you should definitely dump him).
    Last edited: May 21, 2008
  8. May 21, 2008 #7
    What do you need? How badly do you need it? What would you do to get what you need? How many 'red flags' do you see now?

    I talk to a few women around where I live about their problems. I thing that I've found is that they often 'see' what the 'problems' are, but don't make changes in their lives or thinking to change what the problems seem to be. Another thing that these women (and some people, in general) do is that they sometimes ask a question, then ask the same question again, (and again, and again)--

    What I try to do with them is get them to answer the question themselves--even if the first answer may be wrong---then, answer the question with another possible answer (I keep going until they REALLY start thinking about it in different ways).

    So, "Has it ever happened to you that you want something so badly but as much as you try you can't get it?"-----go ahead and give several answers to your own question.
  9. May 21, 2008 #8
    that's funny--

    -in another thread, she said that all she wanted all her whole life was just a chicken and a fruit tree <scratches head while having a puzzled look on my face>
  10. May 21, 2008 #9
    Really? I interpret it as meaning there's a problem with my method, not my goal. Try to reach your goals a different way.

    Secondly, I'd much rather spend my life attempting to reach goals I will never be able to than just giving up. At least I can say I tried.
  11. May 21, 2008 #10


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    honestrosewater hasn't been around for a while, I wonder if she went to college?

    Maybe you're thinking a bit short term for your goal. Some of the best things happen over a long period of time, of years or decades. You have a whole life ahead of you, as long as you don't get hit by a bus tomorrow.
  12. May 21, 2008 #11
    I would never stop trying to reach my goals. I don't want that kind of regret to haunt me into my later years. Time passes so very quickly, I believe choices make a big difference in our quality of life.

    In my mind these choices, I often call doors. Doors open and close often by happenstance, but mostly by choice. Sometimes doors close because other doors need to open.

    Remember, its all about the quality of life you choose to live, what you will become, and how you choose to affect those around you.

    We're also allowed to make mistakes.:redface:
  13. May 21, 2008 #12


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    So this question is more about relationships, hidden in a more general theme.

    I use to think I'm more suited to social science but the maths and physics were my real passion and all I needed to do was some serious work to get over the thinking that the latter wasn't for me. As for relationships, it could be that he dosen't love you enough. Or you don't enough for him. Reasons for that are too numerous to list.
  14. May 21, 2008 #13
    :rofl: sorry, I had too.
  15. May 21, 2008 #14
    Lisa! cant even cook, what good a woman that cant cook? Pfffft.
  16. May 21, 2008 #15
    well, there you go----when they're young, you train them to cook only what you like
  17. May 22, 2008 #16


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    I don't think marlon would be interested in dating cyrus!:wink:

    PS <respond to other posts later>o:)
  18. May 22, 2008 #17

    jim mcnamara

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    Oh darn, another unattainable goal. :smile:
  19. May 22, 2008 #18


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    Are you suggesting cyrus can't cook?

    Uh oh, here comes the food fight!
  20. May 22, 2008 #19

    jim mcnamara

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    More apropos - the several really bright math types I've known have all been, um, socially inept, to be kind. They had trouble communicating at almost any level. Mostly because they were essentially tuned-out of everyday conversation.
  21. May 22, 2008 #20

    (but, I hear he dresses well!!)
  22. May 22, 2008 #21


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    Nope! Suppose cyrus is the greatest cook in the world, honestly would you taste what he's cooked? :uhh:You know the 1 who serves the food for you, is way more important than the cook and its taste.
  23. May 22, 2008 #22
    That's funny, because I live the exact opposite experience... The more skillful I know are mostly the most social ones.
  24. May 22, 2008 #23
    i have alot of goals and alot of them get messed up i just work at them over and over to get it right
  25. May 22, 2008 #24
    start with proper spelling and good grammar
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