You know you're getting old when

  • #1
Ivan Seeking
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At the end of each episode of The Big Bang Theory, a page is seen briefly in which the the producer, Chuck Lorre, expresses his thoughts for the week. Normally they are pretty useless observations of minor events in life, but this one made me laugh.

You know you're getting old when...
you throw your back out on the toilet
you shave your ears
your second wife calls your first wife ma'am.
you are genuinely excited when your prescriptions arrive in the mail
you read the obits in the newspaper to check of ages of the dead people
you read a newspaper
you're bummed out that the smokin' hot chick from Body Heat now looks like William Shatner in drag
you say bummed
Women your age have real breasts and artificial hips
Masturbation leaves you winded
you try to amuse the kid hooking up your Blu-ray player by telling him about Betamax
You pee in morse code - dots and dashes - and have to look to see when your'e done
your car radio is set to "classic rock" so you have something to switch to during NPR pledge drives
your doctor says "that's normal for a man your age", and you're relieved
Watching "The Who" at the superbowl made you inconsolably sad
you wonder if the orgasm you're about to have will actually end your life
 

Answers and Replies

  • #2
jtbell
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You can't be too old if you can read all that in the blink of an eye (which is about how long that "vanity card" stays on screen)! :biggrin:
 
  • #3
Ivan Seeking
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You can't be too old if you can read all that in the blink of an eye (which is about how long that "vanity card" stays on screen)! :biggrin:
DVD + pause. :biggrin: We were already three seasons behind when we found out about the show.
 
  • #4
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The first time you can't do it twice and the second time you can't do it once.
 
  • #5
berkeman
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The first time you can't do it twice and the second time you can't do it once.
Well at least you won't die from it then. There's that :tongue2:
 
  • #6
Evo
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That's a funny list.
 
  • #7
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You know you're getting old when your corpse is moved to make room for a new grave in the graveyard.
 
  • #8
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The first time you can't do it twice and the second time you can't do it once.
That's the difference between fear and panic.
 
  • #9
turbo
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You're getting old when your semi-annual erection turns into an annual semi-erection.
 
  • #10
hotvette
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You know you're getting old when:

you see an attractive person of the opposite sex and don't care
you fall asleep every night at 9pm watching TV
you look forward to your favorite Friday night TV show
 
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  • #11
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ok, i'm busted on the radio thing

i realized i was getting old when i found grey nosehair.
and then when i started looking over my glasses to read small text.
and something else i forget.
 
  • #12
Ivan Seeking
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When you can't see the point in 99.9% of the texting that occurs. When you figure you will outsmart the crowd by waiting for speech-to-text, and text-to-speech, to replace texting. At that point you plan to buy a telephone.

When you need to use the bathroom more often than you need a refill of coffee.

When the doctor asks you not to disrobe.

When you realize that you have socks older than some members of PF.
 
  • #13
lisab
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So...is there a reason this thread was started on https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=446275" [Broken]?
 
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  • #14
DaveC426913
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...every electronic device is "just another whippersnapper gadget".
 
  • #15
Ivan Seeking
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So...is there a reason this thread was started on https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=446275" [Broken]?
Of course not!


Jeez, old people are soooooo suspicious!!!
 
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  • #16
drizzle
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So...is there a reason this thread was started on https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=446275" [Broken]?
Of course not!


Jeez, old people are soooooo suspicious!!!
:rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
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  • #17
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:rofl::rofl::rofl:
:rofl:

This list was funny and HAPPY BDAY LISA xoxox
 
  • #18
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When you can't see the point in 99.9% of the texting that occurs. When you figure you will outsmart the crowd by waiting for speech-to-text, and text-to-speech, to replace texting. At that point you plan to buy a telephone.
Wait, I'm 30 and this sums up my views on texting completely.
 
  • #19
drizzle
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Wait, I'm 30 and this sums up my views on texting completely.
Yeah, I myself do a number of things on that list, and I'm not even 30. But think of it as you're ahead of your age. :biggrin:
 
  • #20
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When you can't see the point in 99.9% of the texting that occurs. When you figure you will outsmart the crowd by waiting for speech-to-text, and text-to-speech, to replace texting. At that point you plan to buy a telephone.
Sums it up well for me too.

Just read this article:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/11/101109113020.htm

Suddenly I wish we had texting when I was a teenager. Seems it would have increased my odds of getting laid over three times, and gotten me invited to the really good parties. LOL
 
  • #21
DaveC426913
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Sums it up well for me too.

Just read this article:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/11/101109113020.htm

Suddenly I wish we had texting when I was a teenager. Seems it would have increased my odds of getting laid over three times, and gotten me invited to the really good parties. LOL
I heard this on the radio this morning and wondered how they managed to establish a cause-effect relationship here. I assumed, being a sound bite, it may have have been oversimplified. But no:


"Drawing from the data, teens who are hyper-texters are 40 percent more likely to have tried cigarettes, two times more likely to have tried alcohol, 43 percent more likely to be binge drinkers, 41 percent more likely to have used illicit drugs, 55 percent more likely to have been in a physical fight, nearly three-and-a-half times more likely to have had sex and 90 percent more likely to report four or more sexual partners.

"The startling results of this study suggest that when left unchecked texting and other widely popular methods of staying connected can have dangerous health effects on teenagers,"
Is this as moronic as it seems?
 
  • #22
Drawing from the data, teens who are hyper-texters are 40 percent more likely to have tried cigarettes, two times more likely to have tried alcohol, 43 percent more likely to be binge drinkers, 41 percent more likely to have used illicit drugs, 55 percent more likely to have been in a physical fight, nearly three-and-a-half times more likely to have had sex and 90 percent more likely to report four or more sexual partners.
That's funny - back in my teenage days possessing an electronic device with a keyboard meant precisely the opposite.
 
  • #23
Dembadon
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That's funny - back in my teenage days possessing an electronic device with a keyboard meant precisely the opposite.
:rofl:
 
  • #24
Evo
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I heard this on the radio this morning and wondered how they managed to establish a cause-effect relationship here. I assumed, being a sound bite, it may have have been oversimplified. But no:




Is this as moronic as it seems?
Gee, it couldn't be that the kids questioned lied on the questionaires, just to yank some guy's chain? :tongue:
 
  • #25
DaveC426913
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That's funny - back in my teenage days possessing an electronic device with a keyboard meant precisely the opposite.
BWAAAHHAAHAH!!! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
 

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