Collection of Lame Jokes

[sbrothy]

Yeah, I'm aware the book's handling of statistics is closer to the number 23, but I really didn't want to go too deep into it if I was the only "disciple". I forgot how ubiquitous (I almost wrote "effervescent" here. I must be getting really tired!) it was/is.

 

[DaveC426913]

Timely...

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[davenn]

A Farmer in Cornwall see's a bloke drinking from his stream & shouts, "Wozzon! Ee dun wanna be drinkin dat, it's full of horse pi$$ an cow dung".
The bloke says "I'm from London and just purchased a property in the village can you speak bit slower please".
The Farmer replies "If - you -use - two - hands - you - won't - spill - any"!

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 366104

Better than fried okra, anyway.

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[BillTre]

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

-Groucho

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[jtbell]

My wife found some postcards that I sent home from my old road trips, before the days of smartphones.

(I was in Madison for the summer meeting of the American Association of Physics Teachers. I still have the T-shirt!)

 

[davenn]

 

[collinsmark]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[BillTre]

View attachment 366147

Looks like he would need some scuba gear.

 

[WWGD]

Looks like he would need some scuba gear.

And a nose plug, to avoid the smell. Yech!

 

[jtbell]

The ultimate way to cut through all the...

 

[fresh_42]

 

[jack action]

Yes, English can be weird. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though.

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[berkeman]

Follow me for more animal training tips.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 366209

I bet it can lick any opponent!

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[fresh_42]

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station…

 

[WWGD]

 

[BillTre]

View attachment 366261

Ha.
My daughter has worked on owl surveys. They play owl calls at certain times to the owls to show up and be counted.

 

[WWGD]

Ha.
My daughter has worked on owl surveys. They play owl calls at certain times to the owls to show up and be counted.

So , how many neighbors, er, owls, have replied? ;)

 

[BillTre]

So , how many neighbors, er, owls, have replied? ;)

Lots. The have a good idea where they live and there are not many people around there.

 

[256bits]

Lots. The have a good idea where they live and there are not many people around there.

The people all left!
Did they get fed up with all the hooting (and hollering )?

 

[DennisN]

 

[jtbell]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[WWGD]

View attachment 366304

The homeless guy in the corner was looking for the contents of his shopping cart!

 

[fresh_42]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[davenn]

 

[jtbell]

A minor generational / cultural difference...

Mark Twain (1897): "Reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated."

Dolly Parton (2025): "I ain't dead yet!"

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[Borg]

Some days are just an epic dumpster fire.