Hi Lochlan.H! While Bobc2 is doing a very thorough job giving you information, I thought I'd give you my personal "executive summary" of SR. Note that this a very informal description which I use as the basis for my intuition on the subject. There's a big difference between memorizing formulas and developing a "feel" for something like this. Anyway...
Special Relativity simply says that light is measured to propagate at the same velocity from all inertial frames of reference. Once we accept this premise, everything else (twin paradoxes, length contraction, time dilation, etc) is basically a consequence of it. Length is measured by rulers, which are constructs whose molecules are ultimately held in place by EM (and other) forces propagating at the speed of light. Similarly, clocks are devices whose internal clocking actions ultimately depend upon the local speed of light. The same is true of the electro-chemical processes in our body and brain cells which determines how we age as well as the "rate" at which we experience reality.
All of reality is ultimately determined by the speed of light.
Now, if a distant observer declared that our local speed of light just slowed down...how could we tell? The answer is that we could not. Our clocks, our rulers and our body's cells would all conspire to hide this fact from us. It would be impossible to measure anything but c for the speed of light due to the very fact that we are ultimately measuring the speed of light against itself! It would be like asking how long the shadow of a ruler is as measured with the shadow of another ruler. You're always going to get the same answer, regardless of the "actual" length of the shadow.
That explains c as measured locally, but it doesn't really explain Lorentz transforms. I think of LTs like this:
all bodies travel at a constant c, but what changes are the vector components making up travel through time and space. If you're stationary in space, you are maximizing your "velocity through time". Alternatively, if an object is moving very quickly through space, its "velocity through time" vector component is small (with the extreme example being a photon, whose "velocity through time" vector component is zero). Thought of in this manner, LTs are simply a tool to calculate a nonlocal body's velocity time- and space-travel vector components
from a particular point of view.
The last thing I'd say here is that you must never get caught up in what the "real" answers are (as in, what is the "true" length of an object). The point of Relativity is that there is NO SUCH ANSWER. There is only length "as measured from this perspective"; time passage "as measured from this perspective", etc. Anyway everyone learns in different manners, I hope my description helps solidify things in the minds of you and your friend. Good luck!
