zoobyshoe said:
If a girl gives a "strong and clear signal", as per my examples, it's an incredibly refreshing experience.
You reside amongst the exceptions.
DaveC426913 said:
There is a reason people don't send strong and clear signals.
Forgive this analogy:
Your analogy is apt, but I disagree with your analysis and break-down of it.
There remains, to this day, the horrid double-standard in what's acceptable in terms of male and female sexual/partnering/mating behaviour. I thought it was (actually it was wishful thinking) a thing of the past, but nope, it's alive and well.
I disagree, Dave, that it's about power in a relationship or leveraging for what you want and more about perception. So your antique shopping analogy works well, because if you see a lovely antique that someone is willing to give to you, you're likely to value it less than if it came to you at some cost, no matter what form that takes.
I work with a number of single young people, and participate in gaming forums populated by younger people, and they
still hold, what I consider, really old fashioned ideas about guys not valuing women who will have sex with them too readily. Males
still value "the chase" and consider it a measure (I don't have to explain this old, worn, tired idea, do I?) of a woman and her self esteem and value of her own self-image if she "gives it up" too easily/soon/readily. And! Young women believe the same things too. Really, the sexual revolution that we thought would bring us the freedom for women to say, "Hey, I want to, too!" hasn't wrought what we thought it might or hoped it would.
Young women, certainly, are more sure of themselves in a whole bunch of other areas of their lives, they're smart, educated, ambitious, and don't in the least think they can't compete easily with males. But the whole mating dance thing? And young women not wanting to be perceived as "cheap and easy" because young men
will perceive them that way, has not changed.
So I wouldn't say it's so much about power or negotiating to get what you want (although getting what one wants is what everyone's discussing, here) but, on a young woman's part, trying to be a whole person who makes her own decisions while still being saddled with antiquated ideas about decorum. Dignity is another thing, and should be maintained for everyone involved. I agree with Zooby in that there's no loss of dignity in saying, "This is what I want" but the rest of the world isn't quite ready to let women have that yet.
Then again, it depends on your definition of 'intelligent'. The truly top percentile seem to have no social skills, and the bottom percentile seem to have a lot of social skills to the point you want to vomit all over their kabala obsessed new age monologue