Bill Maher's amusing open letter to the president

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He's a bit more extreme than I am, but this is mostly pretty much right on.

Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more money to spend--you used up all of that. You can't start another war because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit cards maxed out. No one's speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or space man? Now I know what you're saying: there's so many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote.

But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a ****ty president, but even he never conceded an entire city to rising water and snakes.

On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side.

So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: "Take a hint."
 

Answers and Replies

  • #2
Bill Maher is a funny, funny man.

"You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal."

That's great. It's funny because..., well you know.
 
  • #3
loseyourname
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Didn't Herbert Hoover order the marines to open fire on a peaceful gathering of veterans in DC?
 
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loseyourname said:
Didn't Herbert Hoover order the marines to open fire on a peaceful gathering of veterans in DC?
You mean the Bonus March.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bonus_Army

Two veterans were killed by a police officer, although it appears to have been before Hoover ordered in the cavalry.
 
  • #5
I can see where this thread is going...so I'll stop it right here. It seems that all people do is bash Bush. He is the best president we have ever had--you'll see some day. :rofl: (Ha, just kidding!)
 
  • #6
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kcballer21 said:
Bill Maher is a funny, funny man.

"You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal."

That's great. It's funny because..., well you know.
My personal favorite:

Maybe you're just not lucky.
 
  • #7
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"Giving embryos the vote."

Watch Rove snatch this one up. lol
 
  • #8
SOS2008
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pattylou said:
He's a bit more extreme than I am, but this is mostly pretty much right on.
I was watching an interview he did not long ago. He said he hoped Iraq would be a success, because failure would be tragic. He admonished liberals who take pleasure in failure for political spite against Bush. He also spoke about apathy toward politics in our nation, and how we need to work to involve more Americans in the process. I didn't see any of this as being extreme left.

But yes, he is an intelligent and funny man. (I think Bush has already tried to be a cowboy too. :tongue: )
 
  • #9
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I was basing my comment solely on the quoted material. It is funny, but there are obvious stretches in it.

THe points you say here that he made, all sound wonderful.
 
  • #10
SOS2008
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pattylou said:
I was basing my comment solely on the quoted material. It is funny, but there are obvious stretches in it
Of course it is funny because of the "grain of truth." :wink:
pattylou said:
The points you say here that he made, all sound wonderful.
I thought I'd mention that because I suspect conservative members didn't even read this thread due to labels placed on people like Bill Maher.
 

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