Collection of Lame Jokes

[phinds]

 

[Keith_McClary]

View attachment 282086

It's legal if you cut holes in your masks for the joints.

 

[jack action]

 

[phinds]

Outstanding, Jack

 

[jack action]

 

[hmmm27]

^ hate to ask, but how did he find it ?

 

[Vanadium 50]

The crunching sound when he sat down.

 

[jack action]

 

[jack action]

 

[BillTre]

 

[BillTre]

 

[jack action]

I wasn't sure if I should spread this joke or not:

 

[BillTre]

I drink bourbon because I don't like to keep things bottled up.

 

[kuruman]

Here is an actual statement, which I saw in an op-ed piece, referring to a (universally despised) U.S. Senator: "He is a charisma event horizon". I thought it was brilliant but my non-physicist wife didn't get it.

 

[BillTre]

Here is an actual statement, which I saw in an op-ed piece, referring to a (universally despised) U.S. Senator: "He is a charisma event horizon". I thought it was brilliant but my non-physicist wife didn't get it.

I know who the senator is, but who wrote it. Pretty clever.

 

[kuruman]

I know who the senator is, but who wrote it. Pretty clever.

Yes, the name of the senator in question should be obvious to anyone who cruises the web.

 

[mfb]

but who wrote it

Cliff Schecter

 

[BillTre]

Cliff Schecter

Wow. He's got sharp sense of humor.

 

[WWGD]

It's legal if you cut holes in your masks for the joints.

Smoking weed is not a good idea with a mask! ;).

 

[WWGD]

Recent bumper sticker:
" The Gene Pool could use some chlorine".

 

[mfb]

Don’t complain about rainy days, in Germany the weather is always Wetter.

And if the Sun is shining, it's hell.

Spoiler

Wetter=weather, hell=bright

 

[davenn]

 

[mfb]

In some places you get birds within seconds. Fully grown up already!

 

[jtbell]

Found! The source of the rumors that COVID-19 vaccines contain microscopic tracking devices is the 1967 movie "The President's Analyst" staring James Coburn.

In the movie, the scheme to inject "Cerebrum Communcators" into everyone was the product of the national telecommunications conglomerate, TPC (The Phone Company).

 

[WWGD]

 

[jbriggs444]

You can get an even higher Rankine intelligence score if you work at it.

 

[phinds]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[phinds]

Australian sale on fish and chips

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

Since this is a science site, I clarify gravity is a law and not a theory. Hoping not to have ruined the pic:

 

[phinds]

Since this is a science site, I clarify gravity is a law and not a theory

Well, yeah, but only because that term was thrown around rather loosely back in those days. Today GR is not a "law", so I don't thing the joke is ruined by sloppy use of terms.

 

[jack action]

Singing in the shower is great until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it's a soap opera.

 

[jack action]

It was a lot more fun to be 20 in the 70's than to be 70 in the 20's.

 

[jack action]

If you replace the 'W' with a 'T' in 'When', 'Where', and 'What', you get the answer to each question.

 

[jack action]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[BillTre]

 

[phinds]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[jack action]

History
History

I just rewrote 'History'.

 

[jack action]

While playing tennis, I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger.

Then it hit met.

 

[jack action]

 

[davenn]

one especially for @berkeman

 

[davenn]

View attachment 282375​

Hahaha
what's the problem ? he /she found a duck and brought it back.
The hunter didnt even have to shoot it