Collection of Lame Jokes

[davenn]

Those that know me will understand this ...

 

[fresh_42]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[jtbell]

 

[BillTre]

 

[strangerep]

View attachment 282422

Wow. I didn't realize there was a real-life version of Miss Chokesondick.

 

[BillTre]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

View attachment 282510

@Keith_McClary : It's a Self-Similar dog. Some prefer Shitzu's , others German Shepherds, others prefer Self-Similars.

 

[Keith_McClary]

Self-Similar dog

I can't quite see if it's recursive.

 

[WWGD]

I can't quite see if it's recursive.

And finitely axiomatizable. My kind of dog.

 

[Jarvis323]

 

[Ibix]

@Keith_McClary : It's a Self-Similar dog. Some prefer Shitzu's , others German Shepherds, others prefer Self-Similars.

Related to the Golden Ratio Retriever. Programmers prefer Pointers.

 

[Ibix]

What should you do if you're addicted to sea weed?

Sea kelp.

 

[fresh_42]

If you see this hazardous cargo code - follow that truck. High-proof ethanol.

 

[jtbell]

What should you do if you're addicted to sea weed?

Sea kelp.

And get on shore to dry out.

 

[jtbell]

When I typed "when is c" into Google's search box this morning, its first suggestion was "when is cinco de mayo".

 

[Keith_McClary]

I look forward to the peer reviewed paper on this experimental research:

 

[WWGD]

Don’t complain about rainy days, in Germany the weather is always Wetter.

And in Germany , the children are always kinder.

 

[DrClaude]

When I typed "when is c" into Google's search box this morning, its first suggestion was "when is cinco de mayo".

Lower-fat version: Cinco de Miracle Whip.

 

[fresh_42]

Lower-fat version: Cinco de Miracle Whip.

Mine wants to tell me when is chinese new year.

 

[berkeman]

Mine wants to tell me when is chinese new year.

That's the Google Search AI in action. You are located closer to China than to Mexico.

 

[fresh_42]

That's the Google Search AI in action. You are located closer to China than to Mexico.

But Cancun is closer than Shanghai.

 

[phinds]

 

[OCR]

. . . .

 

[Jarvis323]

View attachment 282628

Lies.

The picture actually dates from 1958, during the Algerian War (i.e., a war for independence waged against French forces in Colonial Algeria). And it depicts a starving donkey that was rescued by a member of the French Foreign Legion who carried it back to his base, where the animal was nursed back to health, given the name “Bambi,” and adopted as a unit mascot — as described by author Douglas Porch in his 1991 history of the Legion:

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/soldier-carrying-donkey/

 

[phinds]

Lies

Spoilsport

It's still a good moral

 

[jtbell]

This morning I saw on the news a report that plastic surgeries have decreased during the pandemic, with one major exception: butt implants are up 22%.

Does this mean that Zoom mooning is the latest new trend?

 

[Vanadium 50]

Lies.

Don't let the truth stand in the way of a good internet meme.

 

[DaveC426913]

Don't let the truth stand in the way of a good internet meme.

But do let Facebook checkers stand in the way.

I posted this fakery to FB as part of my personal "Everything you read is a lie" public service campaign.

Facebook found and flagged it within minutes as containing false information.

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[DennisN]

View attachment 282712

The second guy in that picture looks like a Linux user :

 

[DennisN]

 

[phinds]

 

[etotheipi]

View attachment 282735

I don't get it

 

[fresh_42]

I don't get it

You shouldn't have told us.

 

[phinds]

I don't get it

You are supposed to sound more self-important when you say that

 

[jack action]

I don't get it

Same with me. Just do as I do, and give a thumbs up anyway to encourage those who cannot distinguish good from mediocre humor. With practice, maybe they'll be as good as me one day.

 

[etotheipi]

same vibes

 

[nsaspook]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[davenn]

 

[phinds]

View attachment 282773

This should not be in the joke section but in the animal lovers section.