Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #5,731
News flash:

Musicologists have discovered in Duke Ellington’s archives an unpublished attempt at jazz - country music fusion:

“Take the Hay Train.”
 
Physics news on Phys.org
  • #5,732
An atomic war would be the end of humanity.
But there are disadvantages, too.
 
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  • #5,733
Do you know that feeling if dogs feel that you fear them? For me it's traffic lights who feel that I'm in a hurry.
 
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Likes Wrichik Basu
  • #5,734
fresh_42 said:
An atomic war would be the end of humanity.
But there are disadvantages, too.
On a similar note, people say that climate change threatens the survival of the planet.

No so. Once climate change has killed all the humans, the planet will soon recover.
 
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Likes davenn, Ibix and fresh_42
  • #5,735
DrGreg said:
On a similar note, people say that climate change threatens the survival of the planet.

No so. Once climate change has killed all the humans, the planet will soon recover.
The planet will do anyway, o.k. at least the next 4 gy. However, the biosphere will soon recover!
 
  • #5,736
Juneau coyote activity.jpg
 
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  • #5,738
fresh_42 said:
I would never betray Wile E.
of course not 😄 poor guy already gets such a hard lifeI will be in Juneau later this year but arriving by cruise ship, not plane.
A cruise up and down the Alaskan and British Columbian coasts
 
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Likes BillTre and fresh_42
  • #5,739
davenn said:
of course not 😄 poor guy already gets such a hard life
I watched an episode with my son recently where the coyote actually catches the roadrunner. The expression of incredulous joy on his face was priceless and slightly heartbreaking. You know it's going to go badly for the poor guy.
 
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Likes Steelwolf and davenn
  • #5,740
davenn said:
A cruise up and down the Alaskan and British Columbian coasts
Be aware! If you order a whiskey people will call you an alcoholic. But if you order a Fanta nobody ...
 
  • #5,741
Poor Wile E. Only wants his Beep Well-and-done! And Corned Beep, Roast Beep but his biggest problem is beep on the hoof! (who actually Owns Acme and co)
 
  • #5,742
Speaking of Wile E. Coyote, car guys have their fun with him too:

18005504_n.jpg?_nc_cat=111&_nc_ht=scontent.fymq3-1.jpg

And when I was a teen, I had a T-Shirt that looked a lot like this one:

s-l300.jpg

I always rooted for the poor guy!
 
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Likes davenn, Steelwolf and Ibix
  • #5,743
That coyote is really a crazy clown.
 
  • #5,744
244162
 
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Likes DrClaude and davenn
  • #5,745
244163
 
  • #5,746
I'm a professional counterfeiter - and I have the certificates to prove it.
 
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Likes DrClaude, davenn, BillTre and 6 others
  • #5,747
6a00d8341c5dea53ef022ad39f9da9200d-600wi.jpg
 
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Likes collinsmark, strangerep, DrClaude and 3 others
  • #5,748
244196
 
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Likes davenn, strangerep, Ibix and 1 other person
  • #5,749
risk of bear attack.jpg
 
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  • #5,750
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Likes Klystron, Keith_McClary, collinsmark and 6 others
  • #5,751
davenn said:
of course not 😄 poor guy already gets such a hard lifeI will be in Juneau later this year but arriving by cruise ship, not plane.
A cruise up and down the Alaskan and British Columbian coasts
I like Alaska, Ju Neau?
 
  • #5,752
Lady on the subway reading the map, the part that says 'You are Here' :
" How do they know?"
 
  • #5,753
Juneau

WWGD said:
I like Alaska, Ju Neau?
I still not sure how to pronounce that correctly ??
 
  • #5,754
davenn said:
Juneau
I still not sure how to pronounce that correctly ??
The ending is French. In this case you can't pronounce it correctly. At least I've never heard an English speaker pronouncing the 'u' correctly. Seems out of reach.
 
  • #5,755
davenn said:
Juneau

I still not sure how to pronounce that correctly ??
Here it is pronounced sort of as " You Know" , but instead of a soft 'You', more like in 'Jew
fresh_42 said:
The ending is French. In this case you can't pronounce it correctly. At least I've never heard an English speaker pronouncing the 'u' correctly. Seems out of reach.
Well, we are in the jokes forums, so I guess we can relax rigor here. Ju know?
 
  • #5,756
Walked into a conference for Physicists at the school. Shouted: "Which one of you is Sheldon"?
 
  • #5,757
WWGD said:
Here it is pronounced sort of as " You Know" , but instead of a soft 'You', more like in 'Jew

Well, we are in the jokes forums, so I guess we can relax rigor here. Ju know?
Altho I've been told I do the opposite, using rigor in jokes and relaxing it in my Math...
 
  • #5,758
WWGD said:
Well, we are in the jokes forums, so I guess we can relax rigor here. Ju know?
Yes, but it is interesting. The reason is a different use of the tongue, which is why most foreigners have an accent in English, whereas some other sounds do not exist in English, e.g. Jules (Verne). The 'j' is very soft, a superposition of 'sh' and 'z', and 'u' doesn't have an equivalent. A bit like in 'myriad', but far more closed. On the other hand it is difficult for us non-native speakers to roll the tongue and speak in the back of the mouth instead of the front. Would be interesting to know when this imprinting takes place, and how some manage to overcome it.
 
  • #5,759
fresh_42 said:
Yes, but it is interesting. The reason is a different use of the tongue, which is why most foreigners have an accent in English, whereas some other sounds do not exist in English, e.g. Jules (Verne). The 'j' is very soft, a superposition of 'sh' and 'z', and 'u' doesn't have an equivalent. A bit like in 'myriad', but far more closed. On the other hand it is difficult for us non-native speakers to roll the tongue and speak in the back of the mouth instead of the front. Would be interesting to know when this imprinting takes place, and how some manage to overcome it.
My speculation is that those that don't overcome it are still thinking in their native language. Similar
for problems of English speakers in other languages. The inner-settings are still in the original language
but the language being used has changed.
 
  • #5,760
It is not just a difficulty to make the sound. For people who grew up with English it is often difficult to hear any difference between u and ü (using the German umlaut for the sound here) - something that is really easy for people who grew up using both sounds.

There is a lot of discussion how exactly it works, but it looks like infants can pick up all the differences but then become insensitive to differences not used in the language(s) they hear. It gets much more difficult to learn them again later.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Critical_period_hypothesishttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Language_acquisition#Sensitive_period
 

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