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Collection of Lame Jokes
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True story: back when my wife and I were just dating I impulse-purchased some carnations in a local supermarket on my way over to her place one day. It was a cold grey day and it was starting to rain - so I was slightly surprised when another guy, wearing a rather wet tshirt and no coat and with a slightly wild-eyed expression, skidded to a stop in front of me and asked where I'd bought the roses. I pointed out that they were carnations and gave him directions to the supermarket. I must admit that "what did he do and how angry is she" was exactly what I was wondering.fresh_42 said:
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What amazes me with those stories and the picture above: They work on a global level and everyone (male?!) immediately understands them. No cultural, religious or race distinctions, only a silent agreement which doesn't need any explanation.Ibix said:
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fresh_42 said:
Sheldon Cooper's Jamaican Postman said:
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It's the French equivalent of Latin Juno, which we in the US pronouce it like June' -o, with accent on the first syllable.davenn said:
There's a town on Vancouver Island, BC, called Esquimault -- you'd never guess how the Canadians pronounce it...
The word is of French origin, due to the influence of French fur trappers 150 or so years back, but that's no help in knowing how to say this word.
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At last, a decently awful Geology pun:
What is the highest from of flattery?
What is the highest from of flattery?
A mesa
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"Do you know why I pulled you over?"
"If you forgot, I won't remind you!"
"If you forgot, I won't remind you!"
256bits
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Sure fire way to get arrested for obstruction of justice.fresh_42 said:
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Q: Why do bees only have a queen?
A: If they had a government, too, they wouldn't have enough honey for the rest.
A: If they had a government, too, they wouldn't have enough honey for the rest.
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They have a Sting, too. So possibly The Police.fresh_42 said:
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It's getting hot here, and tomorrow will even be hotter, 'cause that one took a while!Ibix said:
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Imagine the taste when that guy puts those falsies back in his mouth! 
I guess he's the kind of guy who likes to go,... er,... downtown.
I guess he's the kind of guy who likes to go,... er,... downtown.
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93% of statistics are made up on the spot[1].WWGD said:
[1] Ibix, https://www.physicsforums.com/threads/collection-of-lame-jokes.25301/post-6188344, retrieved 3rd June 2019.
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Are normal disputed.WWGD said:
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Lies and damned lies, I believe.WWGD said:
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There are 10 kinds of people, those who count in binary and those who don't.DrClaude said: