Collection of Lame Jokes
- Thread starter quddusaliquddus
- Start date
-
- Tags
- Jokes
Join the discussion
Registration is free. Ask a follow-up in this thread, or start your own.
24,338 replies · 3M views
Physics news on Phys.org
- 19,385
- 15,622
- 19,385
- 15,622
- 13,926
- 16,805
According to one old Star Trek novel the Time Being is a blubbery hippopotamus-like creature. It has no muscle tone at all because it never does anything for itself - other people do things for the Time Being.BillTre said:
Science Advisor
- 13,423
- 4,244
Swamp Thing
- 1,076
- 844
To good to be true?dextercioby said:
Science Advisor
Homework Helper
- 7,908
- 13,226
A paysan of your Romanian count?dextercioby said:
- 13,926
- 16,805
Can you believe it? Someone has glued my pack of cards together! I can't deal with this.
- 13,926
- 16,805
I used to walk to work across the bridge over the lake in St James' Park (picture). One morning I turned the corner on to the bridge and saw a woman coming the other way talking on her phone. I also saw a goose that had just taken off from the lake. The bridge is low with fairly high guard rails, and water fowl taking off have to make quite an early decision if they're going over or under. The goose had committed to "over", presumably before noticing the woman, and was on a collision course with absolutely no manoeuvring room or airspeed to play with, and the woman was phone zombied. I'm not sure I actually had time to yell anything, but what flashed across my brain was the supremely unhelpful comment "I can't yell duck, it's a goose".berkeman said:
(Fortunately the bird scraped together enough altitude to merely rearrange the woman's hair with its belly feathers, and she just kind of flinched and carried on her conversation...)
Last edited:
- 19,385
- 15,622
Me too, dammit !Bystander said:Took me four times??!!
- 19,385
- 15,622
Science Advisor
- 3,648
- 10,067
Admin
- 69,787
- 25,636
Yep, been there and done that. Except usually in my case it was Marketing instead of Designer...jack action said:
Science Advisor
- 3,648
- 10,067
Ever noticed the fallacy behind this line?
Science Advisor
Gold Member
- 2,408
- 5,259
Mine was a manager who didn't muzzle me and instead asked me to describe the features to another group within the company. Yeah, that didn't end well.berkeman said:Yep, been there and done that. Except usually in my case it was Marketing instead of Designer...![]()
Mentor
- 8,478
- 5,700
Halc
Gold Member
- 466
- 389
How does one do something 24/7 when confining it to one day?berkeman said:LOL, I saw this posted in a local rural Silicon Valley Facebook group today. Happy 4th of July!
View attachment 328723
DaveC426913
Gold Member
2025 Award
- 24,697
- 9,100
It's like my birthday. Technically, it's centred on one day, but I welcome celebrations 24/7 all week.
JT Smith
- 499
- 671
Halc said:How does one do something 24/7 when confining it to one day?
berkeman said:In some places around here in Silicon Valley (Oakland especially), it goes on for several days straight.
In San Francisco leading up to and especially during the heart of the pandemic it was an all year thing. There would be peaks of activity on holidays or if a local sports team won but there would also be skyrockets and loud explosions pretty much every night for no apparent reason. It seems to have calmed down a lot lately. I don't know why.
Last edited by a moderator:
Similar threads
- DennisN
- · Replies 17 ·
- Science Fiction and Fantasy Media
- Replies
- 17
- BillTre
- · Replies 4 ·
- Feedback and Announcements
- Replies
- 4
- jedishrfu
- · Replies 2 ·
- General Math
- Replies
- 2
- BadgerBadger92
- · Replies 1 ·
- General Discussion
- Replies
- 1
- Sciencemaster
- · Replies 33 ·
- Linear and Abstract Algebra
- Replies
- 33
- jtbell
- · Replies 188 ·
- Feedback and Announcements
- Replies
- 188
- smart_worker
- · Replies 7 ·
- AI and Computer Science
- Replies
- 7
- psie
- · Replies 3 ·
- Topology and Analysis
- Replies
- 3
- JT Smith
- · Replies 12 ·
- Quantum Physics
- Replies
- 12
- russellsh2
- · Replies 8 ·
- Mechanical Engineering
- Replies
- 8