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| A SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN VANCOUVER READS: We will heel you. We will save your sole. We will even dye for you. A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK: Blind man driving. Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix. In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels. On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels. At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place. On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed. On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber. At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout. On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts. In a Non-smoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action." On a Maternity Room door "Push. Push. Push." At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment. Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming. In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay! At the Electric Company: "We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted. In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up. In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait. At a Propane Filling Station: "Thank Heaven for little grills. In a Chicago Radiator Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak. And the best one for last: Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck: Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises |