Collection of Lame Jokes

[256bits]

A politician , in front of their Parliament/Congress*:
" Half of you here are idiots"
Others:
" Take that back!!"
PolitIcian:
" Ok, half of you are _not_ idiots".
.

 

[dextercioby]

 

[nsaspook]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[DaveC426913]

This is the opposite of lame. The nuances in this are so clever, I smiled just remembering it and had to (re)post.

 

[berkeman]

 

[WWGD]

In Harvard, even the owls are so educated, they say " whom" instead of "who".

 

[BillTre]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 337958

Details, please! Where is that? I try to avoid such places!

 

[DaveC426913]

View attachment 337958

"You may fire when ready."
That's what she said.)

 

[Baluncore]

Details, please! Where is that? I try to avoid such places!

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/...ing-Death-Star-ripe-avocado-Pokemon-ball.html

 

[dextercioby]

 

[DaveC426913]

View attachment 337970

1024×768? This joke is showing its age!

 

[dextercioby]

The lame factor has to come from somewhere, right?

 

[fresh_42]

Today is 01/01/24 and not as the Americans put it 01/01/24!

 

[fresh_42]

When does a joke become a dad joke?

When it becomes apparent.

 

[fresh_42]

Not a good one, but a really "lame" one:

 

[fresh_42]

 

[256bits]

Not a good one, but a really "lame" one:

View attachment 337988

What does it mean then when I wear "dress pants?"

Just wondering....

 

[jtbell]

Today is 01/01/24 and not as the Americans put it 01/01/24!

I prefer 2024-01-01. Makes it easier to sort dates as text.

 

[BillTre]

I prefer 2024-01-01.

In descending size of time units?

 

[topsquark]

In descending size of time units?

63,872,582,400?

-Dan

 

[jbriggs444]

63,872,582,400?

Did you start counting one year prior to the beginning of the epoch?

 

[jtbell]

In descending size of time units?

Yep. Today is 2024-01-02. Leap Year Day is 2024-02-29.

 

[jtbell]

My only New Year's resolution is to abstain...

...from making New Year's resolutions.(Drat, I've broken it already.)

 

[DaveC426913]

I prefer 2024-01-01. Makes it easier to sort dates as text.

Even better: 02024-01-01.

We all remember the Y2K bug. I'm not getting caught with my pants down again.

 

[fresh_42]

Legend says its home to a quite ferocious beast with big pointy teeth!

 

[phinds]