Collection of Lame Jokes
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Sounds like a Florida mosquito.davenn said:
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Let's not forget the classics.
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Legal tip: if you're filing a lawsuit, don't let your lawyers watermark their PDFs with purple dragons in suits.
DennisN
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DennisN
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Oh, this is so true... if you've had a cat or cats, you know exactly what this means...
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DennisN said:
I have read the following phrase about foxes these days:
A fox is cat software running on dog hardware.
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A Texas farmer went on vacation to Australia. He met up with an Australian farmer who proudly showed off his wheat field.
"That's nothing," said the Texan. "Back home, we have wheat fields that are twice as large as this."
Next the Australian pointed out his cattle.
"They're nothing," said the Texan. "Back home, we have longhorns that are twice as big as your cows."
Just then, half a dozen kangaroos
bounded across the road.
"What are those?" asked the Texan.
The Australian replied, "Don't you have grasshoppers
in Texas?"
"That's nothing," said the Texan. "Back home, we have wheat fields that are twice as large as this."
Next the Australian pointed out his cattle.
"They're nothing," said the Texan. "Back home, we have longhorns that are twice as big as your cows."
Just then, half a dozen kangaroos
"What are those?" asked the Texan.
The Australian replied, "Don't you have grasshoppers
Klystron
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Yeah, but then you go "Hey, Zeus!" and end up talking to that Other Guy.nsaspook said:
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I would like to point out that this is not one of my sources. Never ever. I have seen what it does to people! (family)WWGD said:
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\Whoosh news seems to be one such source. https://www.howtogeek.com/783229/what-does-whoosh-mean-on-the-internet/fresh_42 said:
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I don't want to say I'm in a bad mood, but someone just asked my dog if I bite.
DaveC426913
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Caveat: anecdote; not a joke.
At Dim Sum today, for our 33rd Anniversary.
Me: "Ooh! Deep-fried octopus - yum! Ah shoot! I really should uphold my resolution to stop eating octopus, now that resarch is showing them to have some degree of intelligence."
My wife (soto voce): "It's OK. You're only eating the stupid ones."
(Yep She's a keeper.)
At Dim Sum today, for our 33rd Anniversary.
Me: "Ooh! Deep-fried octopus - yum! Ah shoot! I really should uphold my resolution to stop eating octopus, now that resarch is showing them to have some degree of intelligence."
My wife (soto voce): "It's OK. You're only eating the stupid ones."
(Yep She's a keeper.)
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So on the octopus forums, they have their equivalent of this meme...?DaveC426913 said:
https://www.trainerize.me/articles/outrun-bear/
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Did you know that octopuses make a lot of money from playing poker? Seems they always play with suckers.berkeman said:They hate it when you use that old joke. Just saying that you may want to stay out of the water for the next couple of days...