Collection of Lame Jokes

  • Thread starter Thread starter quddusaliquddus
  • Start date Start date
  • Tags Tags
    Jokes
  • #16,231
Looks like someone got a photo of @berkeman and partner on their recent ride!
 
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: berkeman and jedishrfu
on Phys.org
  • #16,232
Homer Simpson once tried running a bakery.

Customer: "This bread tastes terrible. What's in it?"

Homer: "D'oh!"
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: BillTre
  • #16,233
fresh_42 said:
To me as well. I don't have kids, so I do not care what will be left. I don't think that our species deserves survival. At least not those who constantly trade nature for profit. Those few tribes in the Amazonas who don't still have chances to survive when our modern world will long be gone.
We can definitely alter our environment , every time someone drops a plastic bag in a forest that happens, for example. But I don't think we can completely destroy everything around us. There will still be atmosphere , some plants and bacteria and organisms and water , etc.
I think it's like with the industrial revolution, things always get worse before they get better. A first the factories were awful, dark, full of toxic smoke and dirt, life was awful for those that worked there, no wonder the communists gained so much traction back then, especially in the poor agricultural Russia.
Every issue is solvable with patience and time and will, the will sadly is the only thing that is often lacking.
 
  • #16,234
Why did the Pfizer vaccine get a ticket?
Because it was caught "speeding" through trials.
 
  • #16,235
In the light of the recent somewhat depressing tones in this thread, here's a few Homer Simpson jokes about it.

Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

If God didn’t want us to eat at night, he would have made the fridge light too bright!
 
  • #16,236
Screenshot_20230806_143655_Samsung Internet.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: nsaspook, berkeman, fresh_42 and 2 others
  • #16,237
1691414618719.png
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: collinsmark, jack action, Bystander and 3 others
  • #16,239
Wusta, Susta, su shire. There.
 
  • #16,240
WWGD said:
Wusta, Susta, su shire. There.
One of the two mysteries I will never understand. You can say Worcestershire sauce but you cannot say Wurst, you can say urgent, but you cannot say Schrödinger.
 
  • #16,241
fresh_42 said:
One of the two mysteries I will never understand. You can say Worcestershire sauce but you cannot say Wurst, you can say urgent, but you cannot say Schrödinger.
But I can eat at the restaurant " The Best of the Wurst".
Still, I passed my written, verbal German test.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: fresh_42
  • #16,242
I can't tell you the joke about 288 because it's two gross.
 
  • Like
  • Wow
Likes   Reactions: BillTre and phinds
  • #16,243
I'd tell you my pizza joke, but it just too cheesy.
 
  • #16,244
What's the difference between toilet paper and shower curtains?

So you're the one!
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: Swamp Thing, jack action and topsquark
  • #16,245
Q: What is the difference between a watermelon and a jackass?
A: I don't know.

OK, we're not letting HIM choose desert.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: WWGD and Bystander
  • #16,246
_nc_ohc=Clzs9ZES7c4AX8mx71E&_nc_ht=scontent-fra5-1.jpg
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: BillTre and Bystander
  • #16,247
Lame Jokes?

Here we go ...

_nc_ohc=4ZL2cptSFNAAX-QFH-I&_nc_ht=scontent-fra5-1.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: artis, jack action and dextercioby
  • #16,248
Screenshot 2023-08-07 at 7.34.40 AM.png
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: Filip Larsen, fresh_42, phinds and 1 other person
  • #16,249
_nc_ohc=SOvX1DOAchQAX8fIigf&_nc_ht=scontent-fra5-1.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Love
Likes   Reactions: kuruman, phinds and BillTre
  • #16,250
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: phinds and fresh_42
  • #16,251
BillTre said:
I did notice that about this notice. Thanks for the notification.
Noted.

-Dan
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: BillTre
  • #16,252
topsquark said:
Noted.

-Dan
I noticed what you did there.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: BillTre and topsquark
  • #16,253
l6JrcUbHin86xwACkB_SM8XnZYF&_nc_ht=scontent-fra5-1.jpg
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: BillTre
  • #16,254
_nc_ohc=9Jd-boJJ2RAAX_FYIV2&_nc_ht=scontent-fra5-1.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: phinds, jack action and BillTre
  • #16,256
_nc_ohc=7Xd9pIVtl0QAX8Avvfj&_nc_ht=scontent-fra5-1.jpg
 
  • #16,258
_nc_ohc=OASWJ0eq-RkAX-aKkt1&_nc_ht=scontent-fra5-1.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Wow
Likes   Reactions: nsaspook, BillTre and WWGD
  • #16,259
1691497262221.png
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: collinsmark, BillTre and WWGD
  • #16,260
Screenshot_20230808_123458_Samsung Internet.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Wow
Likes   Reactions: collinsmark, gmax137, jack action and 1 other person

Similar threads

  • · Replies 10 ·
Replies
10
Views
2K
  • · Replies 2 ·
Replies
2
Views
2K
  • · Replies 4 ·
Replies
4
Views
2K
  • · Replies 4 ·
Replies
4
Views
6K
Replies
2
Views
4K
  • · Replies 17 ·
Replies
17
Views
5K
  • · Replies 37 ·
2
Replies
37
Views
3K
  • · Replies 7 ·
Replies
7
Views
3K
  • · Replies 15 ·
Replies
15
Views
3K
  • · Replies 5 ·
Replies
5
Views
1K