Collection of Science Jokes P2

[collinsmark]

Today's SMBC:

[Source: http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?id=4146]

 

[davenn]

 

[mfb]

I see[/color] what you did there.

 

[ProfuselyQuarky]

View attachment 102342

Hey, that's cheating :P

 

[DrGreg]

I'm a bit puzzled by this crossword. What do "ecaadi", "elndoe" and "pm" mean?

 

[mfb]

Google knows it!
http://www.unscramble.info/ecaadi
http://namemeaning.info/BabyName-Dena-elndoe
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/pm

 

[davenn]

 

[TheQuietOne]

http://PEG This has always been my favorite!

 

[mfb]

Something went wrong with your image link.

 

[fresh_42]

Q: What's the integral of 1/cabin?

Spoiler

A: log cabin

Spoiler

Nope! Houseboat. You forgot the C.

 

[fresh_42]

$$E = ma^2 + mb^2$$

 

[DennisN]

EDIT: A few seconds after I posted this picture I had the thought that it's not entirely accurate to claim that the stars and planets does not affect lives. They do, just not in a direct physical sense. The stars and planets obviously psychologically affects in some way those who practice and believe in astrology...

 

[mfb]

Well, one star and one planet influence our life massively...

 

[fresh_42]

Well, one star and one planet influence our life massively...

... plus a moon but hopefully no other strays. And the issue about Nemesis isn't decided yet.

 

[CuriousLearner]

We should also include science/math pick-up lines

"Hey girl, you must be a dynamical system toward which my numerical values are evolving because I have a strange attraction for you."

 

[Psinter]

Source

Genius, whoever made this.

Spoiler: Mistranslation

It is stated in the source that the original is in Danish, and that there was a mistranslation. It's octopus, not squid. Still, I laughed when they pointed it out in the comments.

 

[DennisN]

 

[DennisN]

 

[Bystander]

There is another joke which became viral in the 90's with the internet getting more and more popular.

Americans: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision."
Canadians: "Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision."
Americans: "This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course."
Canadians: "No, I say again, you divert YOUR course."
Americans: "THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS ABRAHAM LINCOLN, THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES' ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH. THAT'S ONE-FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP."
Canadians: "This is a lighthouse. Your call."

Usually it's been commentated as being 'real'. Actually the joke dates back to the 30's and whether it's real or not cannot be said anymore. Someone once replied to an anecdote I told him: "I doubt it's true. However, the point is: It could be true."

http://www.hazegray.org/features/honda/

 

[davenn]

http://www.hazegray.org/features/honda/

holy crap, what a mess !

 

[1oldman2]

http://www.hazegray.org/features/honda/

Incredible ! a great argument for GPS.

 

[davenn]

Incredible ! a great argument for GPS.

unfortunately didn't exist in 1923 D

 

[1oldman2]

unfortunately didn't exist in 1923 D

True, the satellite fleet was in its "infancy" in those days.

 

[davenn]

True, the satellite fleet was in its "infancy" in those days.

as in didn't exist ( no satellites) don't forget that sputnik didn't go up till 1957, 2 yrs before I was born

 

[EnumaElish]

Comic-ray observatory is inaugurated

http://iopscience.iop.org/article/10.1088/2058-7058/21/12/22/meta

 

[DrClaude]

http://xkcd.com/1725/

 

[mfb]

Guess the correlation

 

[DennisN]

 

[DennisN]

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 105527
http://xkcd.com/1725/

Aw, I saw this on another forum just now and was going to post it here, but you beat me to it!

 

[fresh_42]

I finally found out why philosophy is forbidden on PF:

 

[Garlic]

Source: Trust me, I'm a "Biologist" Facebook Page.

 

[DennisN]

 

[DennisN]

 

[DennisN]

 

[DrGreg]

Never mind Schrödinger's cat, have you seen Heisenberg's? I'm not sure...

 

[fresh_42]

How to define
$$ \left. \frac{d}{d\, x} \right|_{x=0} \; |x| $$

Spoiler

Economist: Silly question: $0$.
Mathematician: Can't be done at all.
Engineer: Obviously $1$. The real world is positive.
Physicist: Looks like an entanglement of $|-1\rangle$ and $|+1\rangle$
Crackpot: $-\frac{1}{12}$

 

[mfb]

Experienced engineer: 2. We need some safety margin.

 

[DennisN]

 

[DennisN]

 

[DennisN]

 

[DennisN]

And an old joke from Futurama...

 

[DennisN]

Hehe, I just saw this joke by chance...

EDIT: And another...

 

[DennisN]

Ok, the last one for today from me...

 

[mfb]

I fixed the Venn diagrams.

 

[fresh_42]

What are overlapping circles, that are not a diagram?

 

[mfb]

This for example

 

[BillTre]

Space Nation!

I was thinking about putting this in other sections, perhaps "Next Big Thing", or science fiction, but I settled on jokes.

 

[DennisN]

 

[hideelo]