Collection of Science Jokes P2

In summary: Usually it's been commentated as being 'real'. Actually the joke dates back to the 30's and whether it's real or not cannot be said anymore.
  • #71
https://scontent-syd1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/11129911_10205447778706453_7383839669111507964_n.jpg?oh=a9141a3577389b0bf8b89e1236e1ea65&oe=57DF9390
 
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Physics news on Phys.org
  • #72
of course that is something you NEVER tell a woman, specially during an argument ! :wink::smile:
 
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  • #73
Pun based:

Source
7rXkqN3.jpg
 
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  • #74
Psinter said:
Pun based:

Source

hahaha good one :smile:
 
  • #75
An economist, an engineer and a physicist are talking about women. The issue is what is better - to have a wife or to have a mistress?
- economist: It's better to have a mistress. It's cheaper and it leaves you more freedom.
- engineer: No, it's better to have a wife. It makes your life more stable.
- physicist: No, the best is to have both. You tell the mistress that you are with your wife, and tell the wife that you are with your mistress, so you have the whole day to be alone and do physics.
 
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  • #76
ProfuselyQuarky said:
Oh, look a science joke thread. I love a good science joke, but no one understands whenever I tell them :(

This joke is an exceptionally corny joke I read while studying math:

A: What is the integral of 1/cabin?
B: "Log cabin"
A: Nope--house boat. You for got the "C".
I didn't get this.
 
  • #77
DennisN said:
fix.jpg
I fell off the sofa laughing. Really.
 
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  • #78
a couple of chemistry related ones

caffeine and chocolate.jpg
girl - new element.jpg

Dave
 
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  • #79
ProfuselyQuarky said:
A: What is the integral of 1/cabin?
B: "Log cabin"
A: Nope--house boat. You for got the "C".

EnumaElish said:
I didn't get this.

[tex] \int \frac{d \mathrm{cabin}}{\mathrm{cabin}} = \log(\mathrm{cabin}) + C [/tex]

It relies, in part, on the fact that when spoken in English, the letter "C" is pronounced the same as "sea."
 
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  • #80
i liked this, posted at mathoverflow (for topologists): apologies if you have heard it before.

Q: what do you get when you cross an elephant with a chicken?

A: The trivial elephant bundle on a chicken.please lavinia, surely you appreciate this joke.
 
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  • #81
upload_2016-6-4_13-21-30.png
 
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  • #82
Funniest_Memes_sorry-i-couldn-t-resist_18340.jpe
 
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  • #83
fresh_42 said:
There is another joke which became viral in the 90's with the internet getting more and more popular.

Americans: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision."
Canadians: "Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision."
Americans: "This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course."
Canadians: "No, I say again, you divert YOUR course."
Americans: "THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS ABRAHAM LINCOLN, THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES' ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH. THAT'S ONE-FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP."
Canadians: "This is a lighthouse. Your call."

Usually it's been commentated as being 'real'. Actually the joke dates back to the 30's and whether it's real or not cannot be said anymore. Someone once replied to an anecdote I told him: "I doubt it's true. However, the point is: It could be true."

There is a pro quality Youtube video of this. That's where I first heard it. (The lighthouse is Irish.)
 
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  • #84
  • #86
I was going to make a joke about sodium, but Na ...
 
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  • #87
jim mcnamara said:
I was going to make a joke about sodium, but Na ...
On TV here they show a lot of manganese animations.
 
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  • #88
jim mcnamara said:
I was going to make a joke about sodium, but Na ...
Well, Oxygen Potassium, then...
 
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  • #89
:smile: Oxygen went on a date with Potassium. It was OK.
But I thought Oxygen was with Magnesium! OMG!
At first Oxygen asked out Nitrogen, but Nitrogen was all like "NO!"
So Oxygen had that double bond with the Hydrogen twins...
If I didn't know any better, I'd say someone was a HO, but Sodium Hypobromite always told me "NaBrO! Don't spread rumors!"
 
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  • #90
Pepper Mint said:
At first Oxygen asked out Nitrogen, but Nitrogen was all like "NO!"
So nitrogen accepted to bond with oxygen?
 
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  • #91
mfb said:
So nitrogen accepted to bond with oxygen?
Yes, but she has been cautious. She brought her sister as chaperone.
 
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  • #92
images.png
 
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  • #94
images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQarf-W2BF7O3hk8ZypZetMQ0Fh3UQGLcljqD8xGDuG32CLNP55.jpg
 
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  • #95
DennisN said:
images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQarf-W2BF7O3hk8ZypZetMQ0Fh3UQGLcljqD8xGDuG32CLNP55.jpg
I'm not even going to ask if that's Schrodinger's cat. :smile:
 
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  • #96
1oldman2 said:
I'm not even going to ask if that's Schrodinger's cat. :smile:
You mean this cat finally solved the Quantum Relativity problem?
 
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  • #97
Q: What is the biggest fear of the sine function?
A: To get pulled over for an alcohol test.
 
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  • #98
fresh_42 said:
You mean this cat finally solved the Quantum Relativity problem?
Now if it will only "let the cat out of the bag" there is probably a "Nobel" in it for him.
 
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  • #99
fresh_42 said:
You mean this cat finally solved the Quantum Relativity problem?
We don't know. Some fool locked it in a box and lost the key.
 
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  • #100
DrGreg said:
We don't know. Some fool locked it in a box and lost the key.
I understand the cat is perfectly safe as long as no one observes it. :wink:
 
  • #102
Keep Calm and Do Science.jpg
 
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  • #103
I see what you did there.
 
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  • #104
  • #105
davenn said:
keep-calm-and-do-science-jpg.102342.jpg
I'm a bit puzzled by this crossword. What do "ecaadi", "elndoe" and "pm" mean? :smile:
 
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