Exploring Academic and Career Goals: A Critique of REU Free Response Essays

[somewhatshyguy]

Prompt: Write a brief essay on your academic and career goals, and what you hope to gain from our REU program. There are no length requirements, but typically essays are 200-500 words.

The following is a draft, it's complete but I'd like some feedback on what I have now. Any criticism is welcome, anything I can take out or include?
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My goal as an undergraduate is to receive a B.S. in Physics and a B.A. in Mathematics while exposing myself to a broad range of research. I have a deep passion for mathematics, whether in the guise of physics or only for the sake of discovering new math. This has encouraged me to also seek a pure math degree to satiate my obsession for math and to become more capable of creative thought necessary for scientific research. Aside from preforming well in coursework, I hope to participate in a variety of research before graduating, learn how to more effectively communicate ideas, and build a network with people in the scientific community.

In addition to pursuing a career in scientific research, I am determined to help spread scientific knowledge to the public. Programs like Star Talk, a radio and television show that brings science to otherwise non-scientific ideas, have inspired me to take part in the effort to popularize science. Whether it be a small or large part of my career, I hope that I can inform others and help them uncover their natural curiosity for learning.

I have excelled in normal coursework, however, it is increasingly apparent to me that a range of research experience is necessary to cultivate my academic ability. This being said, I believe the projects at [target program, omitted] would offer remarkable insight into areas of research, especially those that are mathematically intense, not available at a small school like [my school, omitted].

 

[Vanadium 50]

1. This doesn't explain why you want to do this particular project at this school.

2. Never use a word like "obsessed". It makes you sound like a crazed stalker.

 

[somewhatshyguy]

1. This doesn't explain why you want to do this particular project at this school.

2. Never use a word like "obsessed". It makes you sound like a crazed stalker.

I'm finding it difficult to explain why I want this particular program. Is it sufficient to say I am very interested in their more theoretical projects and that I don't see many REUs with similar research?

Will change "satiate my obsession for" to "further my interest in."

I appreciate your feedback.

 

[szimmy]

I'm finding it difficult to explain why I want this particular program. Is it sufficient to say I am very interested in their more theoretical projects and that I don't see many REUs with similar research?

Somewhere on their website they should either have listed projects for this coming summer or previous years research. Go through and find some specific topics that you find interesting, they aren't going to be able to effectively match you with a professor if you just say you enjoy theory.What type of theory do you like? They are all extremely different. Condensed Matter Theory? HEP Theory? AMO Theory? You don't have to be set in stone but if you at least give them a preference to what you would like to do then that helps.