You are correct that from the point of view of an outside observer they would see material approaching the event horizon but would not see it 'fall in' as such.
Imagine two observers, Alice and Bob. Suppose that Alice falls into the black hole and Bob is stationary at infinity with respect to the black hole. Then suppose that Alice sends light pulses to Bob at a constant rate (e.g. 1 per second) with respect to the time she measures, then as she falls closer and closer to the black hole Bob would measure a decrease in the rate of the signals received from Alice. In other words, what Alice sees as a second may correspond to 5 seconds to Bob, exactly how much the signals vary from each other depends on how close Alice is to the Schwarzschild radius - The signal rate would approach infinity as she came closer and closer to the event horizon.
Although Bob would not see Alice cross the Schwarzschild radius, that does not mean that Alice doesn't cross it. From Alice's point of view she would cross the event horizon as you would expect, its just that Bob wouldn't see it happen. As Alice approaches the black hole there would also be gravitational redshift to take into account, so the signals Bob sees from Alice would get increasingly redder as she approached the event horizon. Likewise, if Alice was to look at Bob, the light she would get from him would be increasingly bluer (redshift in reverse - blueshift).
Once Alice falls past the Schwarzschild radius, Bob won't get any new signals from Alice, although he may get redshifted signals that Alice sent to him before she 'crossed over'.
If Alice's spacecraft fell into the black hole, Bob could (in theory) measure the increase in mass to the black hole by measuring the Schwarzschild radius of the black hole, but since black holes have a lot of mass anyway, unless Alice's spacecraft is similar in mass to a red giant or something it wouldn't have much of an effect.
btw, although I don't think I explicitly said it above, I've assumed that there is little/no rotation with respect to the central mass which gives rise to the black hole. If there is rotation, then there are other interesting effects e.g. from Bob's point of view, the Schwarzschild radius would be larger than if there was no rotation - Think about the equivalence of matter and energy: increase in rotational energy equates to an increase in mass -> larger Schwarzschild Radius.
With respect to quantum tunnelling at the Schwarzschild radius, that's related to Hawking radiation -
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hawking_radiation