Renge Ishyo
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I believe that the only time the change in energy is independent of the reference frame is when you are considering only inertial frames in Newtonian physics.
Work is a Newtonian concept. Of what value is it to try to describe what it might be in situations where we cannot even test our conclusions? The point of the example I gave earlier was to show how "honest" calculation results made in accelerated frames cannot be trusted because the laws of physics weren't created (and therefore, don't necessarily have to hold) in such frames to begin with.
I suspect (perhaps incorrectly) that this "work" is in fact illusory, and must in some way tie into the way we conceive of gravitation, curved space-time, etc. I don't know. This is what I'm trying to figure out.
Work is a term used to describe an input or output of energy to a system. We can describe what it is only so far as we have experiments that can verify that it behaves the way we think it behaves. Part of the problem with modern physics is that most of the new arguments put forth these days are completely untestable (both by logic and by experiment).
Therefore, when such explanations are offered up as "evidence" all that one can do is just shrug and say "o.k., maybe so" or better yet "I'll believe that when its proven...which more than likely will be never. Until then I will stick with testable conclusions." If you adopt the latter stance then the question is answerable and your son wins because the theories you have put forth that require the term work to be redefined have not been tested. If you adopt the former stance then you both lose and neither side can win because the "true nature of work" is something that might be beyond the reach of science. The only difference I suppose is that in the former case he doesn't win, and maybe that's what you're going for?