Moving: Pros & Cons of My Dream Place

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The discussion centers around a person facing the difficult decision to move from a beloved one-bedroom apartment to accommodate their daughter, who wants to move in to save on commuting costs. The current living situation is cherished for its natural surroundings, including a ravine and wildlife, which will be lost in the move. Two potential two-bedroom apartments are being considered, each with distinct pros and cons, including concerns about safety and parking. The financial implications of the move are significant, as the new rent will increase expenses, despite the daughter’s intention to help with costs and household chores. There is skepticism about the daughter's commitment to contributing and the long-term viability of the living arrangement, especially with her boyfriend involved. The conversation also touches on broader themes of financial responsibility and the impact of the current economic climate on family dynamics. Ultimately, the need for a larger space is pressing, but the emotional attachment to the current home complicates the decision.
Evo
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I guess I'm moving :(

I don't want to, I love my place. It's my dream place. But my older daughter, the Spawn of Evo, has just moved in with her dad to save money, and now my youngest, Evo Child wants to move in with me to save money and cut down an almost 100 mile daily commute.

The problem is that I have a 1 bedroom apartment now and we'll need two bedrooms if she moves in.

We've been looking at the 2 bedroom apts here in my complex, and they are gorgeous, but there are pros and cons to each, the worst for me is that I will leave my ravine with the babbling brook and the beautiful stone arch over my patio and my squirrels and bunnies.

More to follow on the pros and cons of the two units we're considering.

One has no kitchen space, but a gorgeous garden bath that is to die for and a huge living room. It has no garages though, and no nearby parking.

The other has an attached two car garage, a large kitchen, and a lot of windows. Unfortunately it has a very steep staircase that ends in a tiled floor and a large window in front. This means I will tumble down the stairs, bounce off the tile and fly through the glass window. Evo Child is terrified. She estimates I will kill myself in less than a week.
 
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I for one am glad to hear you will be moving further from the ditch of doom! And, with what you've been talking about at your own workplace perhaps putting your job on the line in the near future, it sounds like a wise move to cut expenses just in case the worst happens.
 


I don't know why you should move if the need for two bedroom is only temporary which I assume it is.
 


I'm so sorry to hear this :cry:.

Why don't we all pool our resources, buy a bar/scuba shop in the Caribbean, and go live happily ever after?
 


Moonbear said:
I for one am glad to hear you will be moving further from the ditch of doom! And, with what you've been talking about at your own workplace perhaps putting your job on the line in the near future, it sounds like a wise move to cut expenses just in case the worst happens.
Actually, my expenses will increase several hundred dollars to pay for the 2 bedroom. The Evo child wants to cut costs by moving in with me, I will be taking on the added rent so that she can cut back on work and concentrate more on school. But then she says when she graduates she will take care of me. :rolleyes:
 


OK, if you're willing to toughen up and learn to tolerate (not love!) Maine winters, there is a 2-br house located above a double-car garage very nearby. It is $123K and is quite fancy inside. You might have to suck up to somebody at TDS in order to get employment, but that's not all that hard.
 


This is the main thing, Evo Child wants the one with this bathtub. That bathroom is 11 x 12 feet and has a separate shower and double sink. That's a jacuzzi.
 

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Evo said:
This is the main thing, Evo Child wants the one with this bathtub.

A deep recession is the perfect opportunity to learn the difference between a want and a need :smile:.
 


lisab said:
A deep recession is the perfect opportunity to learn the difference between a want and a need :smile:.
Yes, and she realizes that we aren't geting the deluxe 3 bedroom.

I want my ravine. :(( She says that she won't let up on the apartment manager until I get a 2 bedroom back on my ravine, they are just occupied right now.
 
  • #10


Evo said:
Actually, my expenses will increase several hundred dollars to pay for the 2 bedroom. The Evo child wants to cut costs by moving in with me, I will be taking on the added rent so that she can cut back on work and concentrate more on school. But then she says when she graduates she will take care of me. :rolleyes:

I didn't realize this was "make mom pay for my rent" type of cutting expenses. I thought it was "cut down on cost of commuting and share rent with mom instead of paying for my own place" type of cutting expenses. If she thinks you're paying all the rent, ask her what color blanket she'd like for the couch. :rolleyes:
 
  • #11


Moonbear said:
I didn't realize this was "make mom pay for my rent" type of cutting expenses. I thought it was "cut down on cost of commuting and share rent with mom instead of paying for my own place" type of cutting expenses. If she thinks you're paying all the rent, ask her what color blanket she'd like for the couch. :rolleyes:
LOL. Actually I did. I told her she could move into my place for free.

She's offered to pay up to $200 a month. And take care of me. And all of my errands, do the shopping and the house cleaning, laundry, do my car maintenance, do the dog, etc...

So basically, I have nothing to do once I come home from work. She'll be my personal slave. Not too bad.
 
  • #12


Hope you find a nicer place!:smile:

PS: How about asking her to move in with her bf?:biggrin:
 
  • #13


I think this recession has created a issue of oneness and many people will know what is true love and affection. i am happy for you that your daughter will be joining you and can have a happy joint family.
 
  • #14


Evo said:
She'll be my personal slave. Not too bad.

Not too realistic. You are too soft.
 
  • #15


Lisa! said:
Hope you find a nicer place!:smile:

PS: How about asking her to move in with her bf?:biggrin:

Poor Evo child bf has been strong armed into moving in with Evo.
 
  • #16


Am I the only one to read between lines "to cut on costs we will make Evo pay for everything, even if she may lose her job any time"?
 
  • #17


Your daughter could always move in with me, Evo. :!)
 
  • #18


Borek said:
Am I the only one to read between lines "to cut on costs we will make Evo pay for everything, even if she may lose her job any time"?
That is a scary thing. If I were working for Evo's employer, I'd be looking for any way to create a soft(er) landing in case the ax falls, and not be taking on a more expensive lease. Maybe spring for a futon for the living room and double up in the current place.

My sister-in-law had worked at the local telecom for decades, and when she was about to turn 55, she was "offered" early retirement instead of termination. The greatly-reduced benefits looked better than 26 weeks of unemployment checks with no real prospect for a new job, so she took it.
 
  • #19


Borek said:
Am I the only one to read between lines "to cut on costs we will make Evo pay for everything, even if she may lose her job any time"?

Nope, that's how I'm reading it too. And I agree that past history suggests those promises of indentured servitude will only last until she's moved in, and then will vanish. Perhaps it's about time for her to learn that all those other indulgences are expenses that can be cut before you expect mom to pay the rent for you. Vacations...no. Nights out for dinner and drinking...no. New clothes...no. Buying lunch rather than making it...no.

No offense Evo, but your daughters have been over-indulged and have not learned to be frugal when times require it. They should be looking for ways to help cut YOUR expenses now too, especially now that they are both adults and should be independent and you're the one facing losing your job.
 
  • #20


Moonbear said:
Vacations...no. Nights out for dinner and drinking...no. New clothes...no. Buying lunch rather than making it...no.


No:cry:
 
  • #21


Evo said:
Unfortunately it has a very steep staircase that ends in a tiled floor and a large window in front. This means I will tumble down the stairs, bounce off the tile and fly through the glass window. Evo Child is terrified. She estimates I will kill myself in less than a week.

Strategically placed cushions?
 
  • #22


Evo said:
This means I will tumble down the stairs, bounce off the tile and fly through the glass window. Evo Child is terrified. She estimates I will kill myself in less than a week.

Yes, but the bright side of this is that then she'll only need a one-bedroom. And I know where there's a vacancy with a beautiful view of the ravine.
 
  • #23


Vanadium 50 said:
Yes, but the bright side of this is that then she'll only need a one-bedroom. And I know where there's a vacancy with a beautiful view of the ravine.
:smile: :rolleyes:
 
  • #24


Recalling an earlier thread, just make sure to check out the smoking neighbors in the new place. Fresh air!
 
  • #25


rolerbe said:
Recalling an earlier thread, just make sure to check out the smoking neighbors in the new place. Fresh air!
I think I've decided on the upstairs apartment because it has a practical kitchen. I've been by there a number of times and haven't seen crowds of people hanging around outside smoking like at my current place.

Although they all smoke, except for the guy to the north of me, we are really good friends, and I'm going to miss them. We are all squirrel and bunny lovers and we keep the critters pretty well fed. I'm going to really miss our "nature chats". The smokers are always thanking me for setting the food up on the squirrels "dinner tables". As soon as I start setting the feed out, their entire family comes out on the balcony to watch the action.

Although the new place is on the other side of the ravine, I won't have ground level access to set out food. Evo Child says I can toss food to them, but I was thinking that with all of the brilliant engineers here, that someone could devise a squirrel elevator to bring them up to my balcony to eat. I'm certain they could be trained to use it. :biggrin:
 
  • #26


Evo said:
Although the new place is on the other side of the ravine, I won't have ground level access to set out food. Evo Child says I can toss food to them, but I was thinking that with all of the brilliant engineers here, that someone could devise a squirrel elevator to bring them up to my balcony to eat. I'm certain they could be trained to use it. :biggrin:
You don't need an elevator for squirrels. If you hang a rope from your balcony railing, and they know there's food there, they'll climb up all by themselves. Just set out a bird-feeder with black-oil sunflower seeds in it. Squirrels know that when flocks of seed-eating birds are congregating, dinner's on.
 
  • #27


Evo said:
... But then she says when she graduates she will take care of me. :rolleyes:

She didn't by any chance use the phrase "Bada bing, bada boom" at any time during that conversation did she?
 
  • #28


Artman said:
She didn't by any chance use the phrase "Bada bing, bada boom" at any time during that conversation did she?
Or "An offer you can't refuse."? :eek:
 
  • #29


My parents would never let me move in for FREE!

They would rather give me money to stay out of the house if I needed help financially. But no way can I move in and save money at their expense.
 
  • #30


JasonRox said:
My parents would never let me move in for FREE!

They would rather give me money to stay out of the house if I needed help financially. But no way can I move in and save money at their expense.
My ex husband offered my older daughter $700 a month to not move in with him, she moved in on him anyway.

Turns out Evo Child plans to pay me the difference between the old and new place, I didn't understand that. She also won a gift card for the Cheesecake Factory and she surprised me yesterday at lunch (she drove to my office) with a piece of white chocolate raspberry cheesecake. Then last night she dropped by with a hot apple turnover that she knew I liked. :!)
 
  • #31


I know where you can find a nice house overlooking a beautiful stream in a quiet neighborhood. Just be careful pulling into the garage.


How much does a house weigh, anyway?



"Let's see, my car insurance is with Geico and my home insurance is with State Farm. You think I should call AAA for this?"
 
  • #32


BobG said:
I know where you can find a nice house overlooking a beautiful stream in a quiet neighborhood. Just be careful pulling into the garage.


How much does a house weigh, anyway?



"Let's see, my car insurance is with Geico and my home insurance is with State Farm. You think I should call AAA for this?"

:smile:
 
  • #33


Evo said:
Turns out Evo Child plans to pay me the difference between the old and new place, I didn't understand that.
That's much better! Though, still, it might be a better idea to set up a futon or something in the current place and take your time looking for another apartment until you're more sure of your job situation. You wouldn't want to get locked into a new, more expensive lease and lose your job unless your daughter could afford more of the rent in a pinch. And that would give you more time to look around and see if you could find something as nice but for less rent.

BobG said:
I know where you can find a nice house overlooking a beautiful stream in a quiet neighborhood. Just be careful pulling into the garage.


How much does a house weigh, anyway?



"Let's see, my car insurance is with Geico and my home insurance is with State Farm. You think I should call AAA for this?"

:smile: Watch the first step out the front door!
 
  • #34


Moonbear said:
:smile: Watch the first step out the front door!
They could cut out the end walls and hollow the interior and have a nice New England-style covered bridge!
 
  • #35


Evo said:
She's offered to...do the dog, etc...

GASP!

NO!...REALLY?

Surely you're NOT going to let her do the dog!

:smile: :smile::smile:
 
  • #36


turbo-1 said:
They could cut out the end walls and hollow the interior and have a nice New England-style covered bridge!

There's probably no way they can repair the bridge without moving the house first. Otherwise, that would be such a cool idea! Especially if at least a few remnants of the intereior are left intact - kitchen sink, toilet, fireplace (of course, I doubt a mobile home has a fire place).

Come to think of it, did they ever find something to do with all those mobile homes FEMA bought after Katrina?
 
  • #37


Tsu said:
GASP!

NO!...REALLY?

Surely you're NOT going to let her do the dog!

:smile: :smile::smile:
:smile: tsu you crack me up, I wish that you'd post more often. You could win the funniest member award hands down!

BTW, the annual funniest member voting will be starting in the next couple of weeks.
 
  • #38


Evo said:
She's offered to pay up to $200 a month. And take care of me. And all of my errands, do the shopping and the house cleaning, laundry, do my car maintenance, do the dog, etc...

So basically, I have nothing to do once I come home from work. She'll be my personal slave. Not too bad.
Perfect. Yea PF. You could really get some work done here now.

But I would miss you going out on Sunday mornings feeding the birds and squirrels during chat.

So I take it that the job situation is not a problem?
 
  • #39


dlgoff said:
But I would miss you going out on Sunday mornings feeding the birds and squirrels during chat.
:cry: Me too.

So I take it that the job situation is not a problem?
Her idea is that if I lose my job that she can cut some classes and work more to make up the difference. :rolleyes:

My boss says that since I'm the top ranked employee in our branch that I don't have to worry. Yeah, right.
If I did lose my job, I could just move back into a one bedroom again, but it wouldn't be in the woods with a babbling brook. I'm in my dream location right now. I thought I'd live here until I was carted away. :frown:

OH DEAR GOD, THERE IS A FLY IN HERE AND IT WON'T DIE. I've been spraying the sucker with Raid flying insect instant kill, and it's still flying. I thought I had drowned it a minute ago, it was completely covered in poison foam. IT WON'T DIE.
 
  • #40


Evo said:
OH DEAR GOD, THERE IS A FLY IN HERE AND IT WON'T DIE.

Think about it - if you will not move, you will have to deal with it for the rest of your live.
 
  • #41


Interesting insects have become immune to raid already :)
 
  • #42


martharon said:
I think this recession has created a issue of oneness and many people will know what is true love and affection.

That's what we think of our two bedroom for five!... usually... :biggrin:
 
  • #43


:cry: Evo Child found a renter and they want to move in next week, and she said ok!

So we're taking a model we don't really want becuase the one we want won't be read until Feb 6th.

:frown: :frown: :frown:

I mean, it's not bad, but the other one was PERFECT. I had squirrel trees, no one behind us, just a hill, wilderness, bunnies. The one we're taking would have a greater appeal to *normal* people, a nice groomed and landscaped large area. Not a squirrel in sight. Just pristine recently planted trees and shrubs and people with lovely patio furniture. :cry:

I HATE IT. It also has less windows, and a weird curved driveway.

Does anyone want an old Evo to move in with them? You have to have wilderness, a creek and wild animals.

Where's my Prozac?

Oh yeah, I don't take Prozac. :frown:
 
Last edited:
  • #44


bummer---


well...what's your new address? I can catch and send one of the squirrels around here.
 
  • #45


rewebster said:
bummer---


well...what's your new address? I can catch and send one of the squirrels around here.
Can you send a pair that can mate?
 
  • #46


Evo said:
Can you send a pair that can mate?

well, yes, I CAN!

but, first...

do you have enough nuts around the place?
 
  • #47


Evo said:
Can you send a pair that can mate?

Evo what kind of things are you into :eek:
 
  • #48


zomgwtf said:
Evo what kind of things are you into :eek:
You really don't want to know...
 
  • #49


rewebster said:
do you have enough nuts around the place?
I'm nutty enough for a flock of squirrels. What do you call a bunch of squirrels?

Also, how many 22-23 year old men would be thrilled about moving in with their girlfriend's mother?

I feel so sorry for Evo Child's boyfriend, he's such a sweet guy. This has got to be the last thing he'd ever want.

But you cannot say no to her. She is so logical and so persuasive. And then she has those huge robin's egg blue almond shaped eyes with thick, long lashes, and that face she makes. Her friends all tell me it's not fair. They can't say no to her when she makes "the face".
 
  • #50


Evo said:
I'm nutty enough for a flock of squirrels. What do you call a bunch of squirrels?

Also, how many 22-23 year old men would be thrilled about moving in with their girlfriend's mother?

I feel so sorry for Evo Child's boyfriend, he's such a sweet guy. This has got to be the last thing he'd ever want.

But you cannot say no to her. She is so logical and so persuasive. And then she has those huge robin's egg blue almond shaped eyes with thick, long lashes, and that face she makes. Her friends all tell me it's not fair. They can't say no to her when she makes "the face".

a bunch of squirrels? hmmm, an infestation or a squirrellot---

your daughter sounds cute---did she get it from her dad?


moving, and moving from a nice place to 'not a nicer place' are two diff things
 

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