Random Thoughts Part 4 - Split Thread

[dkotschessaa]

How about adding to this: I always thought of making it into a sort of street theater by putting many of these together:

"Louisa adams was the only presidential wife born a broad (abroad)"

"Maybe Hillary has not finished her operation yet. "

Or
" Did you call your aunt Martha"

" No"

"Why"?

" Her name is not Martha"

etc. I always thought of holding a conversation in public putting together lines of this sort.

My father was into watch making and repair and had been learning the trade from another gentleman. I remember having a very Abbot and Costello like conversation with him once regarding "the watch guy." I don't remember the details. "You're watching which guy?" "No I saw the watch guy." It's not very good but there's something in there.

 

[fresh_42]

"You're watching which guy?" "No I saw the watch guy." It's not very good but there's something in there.

Mr. Leuchtag: Liebchen - sweetness, what watch?
Mrs. Leuchtag: Ten watch.
Mr. Leuchtag: Such watch?
Carl: Hm. You will get along beautiful in America, mm-hmm.

 

[Silicon Waffle]

I am not barking and will eat dirt a little bit more. Hopefully after my simulation I will become a real man!

 

[OmCheeto]

We were talking to somebody recently who told us they cut their finger with a mandolin and had to go to the E.R. My first thought was that this person was a very hardcore bluegrass player or something.

My little brother bought me a Mandolin at least 11 years ago for my birthday. I likened the strings to razor blades. Fortunately, one of the strings broke soon afterwards, and the new strings were not half as bad.

 

[WWGD]

Still drinking cold drinks in Winter. Not a good idea, specially since I lost my big coat.

 

[lisab]

I'll wait until it's... one JILLION dollars!

How about one Brazilian?

...oh get real...

 

[lisab]

Do you have a CO detector?

Yes, his name is Enigman!

You and I are on the same page - I bought one Saturday. Better safe than sorry.

 

[fresh_42]

Still drinking cold drinks in Winter. Not a good idea, specially since I lost my big coat.

There are parts of the world where losing the big goat is really a problem.

 

[WWGD]

The proper 5 syllable version as opposed to the sloppy 4 syllable one.

Yes, how dear you ignore the spellcheck function available in just about any software that allows you to write.

 

[WWGD]

There are parts of the world where losing the big goat is really a problem.

Now you're just getting my goat. Could you please also get my coat while you are at it?

 

[fresh_42]

Now you're just getting my goat. Could you please also get my coat while you are at it?

https://nuhswelt.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/ziege-e1267047688504.jpg

 

[Borek]

So my book found its way to the Polish edition of Newsweek

 

[fresh_42]

So my book found its way to the Polish edition of Newsweek

Moje gratulacje!

 

[zoobyshoe]

So my book found its way to the Polish edition of Newsweek

View attachment 94179

Fantastic! Congratulations! I hope it becomes a best seller.

 

[zoobyshoe]

?
Is that the proper spelling? I'd write seriously. Well we learn new things all the time :-)

I was joking because it struck me as a hard word to misspell.

 

[fresh_42]

I was joking because it struck me as a hard word to misspell.

This happens to me from time to time at the keyboard: transposed letters.
Although I could not and don't want to claim it for me, it's problematic to beef about transposed letters because you never know whether you make fun of a dyslexic for whom it is a common mistake. Just wanted to mention.
.

 

[zoobyshoe]

This happens to me from time to time at the keyboard: transposed letters.
Although I could not and don't want to claim it for me, it's problematic to beef about transposed letters because you never know whether you make fun of a dyslexic for whom it is a common mistake. Just wanted to mention..

I knew from your posting history that you aren't. We have had a lot of dyslexic members and it is apparent in most of their posts. I certainly wouldn't make fun of them and, in fact, I once got very bent out of shape at a member who characterized dyslexia as "laziness."

 

[fresh_42]

I knew from your posting history that you aren't.

Damn. No more excuses for stupidity.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Damn. No more excuses for stupidity.

Well, WWGD was right: I just have OCPD about the spellcheck red underlining. Plus "seriuosly" sounded like someone giving the full, proper word, when most use the sloppy, easier to pronounce version: "aluminium," as opposed to "aluminum." I guess I didn't phrase my post so people made that connection.

 

[lisab]

So my book found its way to the Polish edition of Newsweek

View attachment 94179

Wow - WOOT!11!

 

[WWGD]

My first thought was: You need glue. You need many gluons to do it. But the joke limps for they are broken at the molecule level. Therefore it's an electromagnetic problem. So why can't we defrag bus seats? Seriuosly, why can't we glue the polymer molecules again by applying a smart electromagnetic procedure?

No, I meant shifting people around so that there are no empty spots between people sitting, and all empty seats are along the same spot.

 

[fresh_42]

No, I meant shifting people around so that there are no empty spots between people sitting, and all empty seats are along the same spot.

At 1:47.

 

[Silicon Waffle]

No, I meant shifting people around so that there are no empty spots between people sitting, and all empty seats are along the same spot.

How insightful!

 

[Silicon Waffle]

So my book found its way to the Polish edition of Newsweek

View attachment 94179

Congratulations!

-----
But did you ever pay the press to do that for you ?
(Just joking I know I ain't a classic salesman )

 

[fresh_42]

May we already get excited about this:
http://www.sciencealert.com/rumours...irst-ever-observations-of-gravitational-waves

 

[Silicon Waffle]

May we already get excited about this:
http://www.sciencealert.com/rumours...irst-ever-observations-of-gravitational-waves

Oh yes, I am excited to realize also why the moon looks ugly in actuality, far different from what most Asian stories describe for kids, i.e beautiful moonlight. It's because the Earth's gravity changes its shape with giant holes on the surface that no natural make-up cosmetics can ever likely suffice to fill up.

 

[zoobyshoe]

I finally got another copy of that book that had pages ripped out of it. Sometime later tonight I shall discover the secret of why they were suppressed, or alternately I will remain confused as to why they were torn out.

 

[nuuskur]

Finite Abel p-group is a directsum of its cyclic subgroups *zombie voice*

 

[fresh_42]

I finally got another copy of that book that had pages ripped out of it. Sometime later tonight I shall discover the secret of why they were suppressed, or alternately I will remain confused as to why they were torn out.

What was it about? I mean the book, not the torn out pages.

 

[zoobyshoe]

What was it about? I mean the book, not the torn out pages.

Murder mystery. "Wolves Eat Dogs," by Martin Cruz Smith. Part of a whole series featuring Russian police detective, Arkady Renko. A long, long time ago, one of his books, "Gorky Park" was a major Hollywood movie. It was the Soviet Union at that time. Renko has survived the transition and is still investigating murders in the post-Soviet era.

 

[Ibix]

Murder mystery. "Wolves Eat Dogs," by Martin Cruz Smith. Part of a whole series featuring Russian police detective, Arkady Renko.

The missing pages would reveal that, in Soviet Russia, dogs eat wolves.

 

[Borek]

But did you ever pay the press to do that for you ?

I have no idea what my publisher did to get the review published (flattery? arm twisting? old boy society? or is just the book good enough?) - but I have reasons to believe it didn't involve money. Actually the narrative behind my confidence is probably worth a short story

 

[Borg]

Awesome achievement, Borek. Congratulations on the book and best wishes on your continued success!

 

[zoobyshoe]

The missing pages would reveal that, in Soviet Russia, dogs eat wolves.

Wolves drink beer. I now know the secret of the missing pages:

Arkady is sitting in a bar. A most interesting Hispanic man comes in with two beautiful women and orders a Dos Equis. The bartender says, "What's that?"

Arkady freezes as his mind goes back to the crime scene where an empty Dos Equis bottle was found under the victim's couch cushion.

A curious thing, because Dos Equis is not sold in Russia.

 

[zoobyshoe]

I have no idea what my publisher did to get the review published (flattery? arm twisting? old boy society? or is just the book good enough?) - but I have reasons to believe it didn't involve money. Actually the narrative behind my confidence is probably worth a short story

If it sells enough, it might get translated into English. Then we can all read it.

 

[dlgoff]

So my book found its way to the Polish edition of Newsweek

 

[fresh_42]

Murder mystery. "Wolves Eat Dogs," by Martin Cruz Smith.

So now you're afraid someone is running around in SD with a perfect handbook (the torn out pages) for werewolves?

 

[zoobyshoe]

So now you're afraid someone is running around in SD with a perfect handbook (the torn out pages) for werewolves?

Not really. I was afraid someone might have been trying to censor this book.

However, now that I know what's on the pages that is unlikely, and it's still a mystery why they got torn out of the other copy. The WWGD hypothesis, that someone accidentally stained them so badly they thought it best to remove them is now first in line. And the ibix hypothesis, that someone's young child did it, is a close second.

 

[collinsmark]

Or maybe somebody really likes Dos Equis?

 

[fresh_42]

Not really. I was afraid someone might have been trying to censor this book.

However, now that I know what's on the pages that is unlikely, and it's still a mystery why they got torn out of the other copy. The WWGD hypothesis, that someone accidentally stained them so badly they thought it best to remove them is now first in line. And the ibix hypothesis, that someone's young child did it, is a close second.

There is another possibility: Urgent needs all of a sudden to get some paper ...

 

[Ibix]

Dos Equis is nice. Not sure I'd go so far as to rip pages out of a book just to hang on to the mere mention of it, though.

 

[zoobyshoe]

There is another possibility: Urgent needs all of a sudden to get some paper ...

That occurred to me, but there are completely blank pages both at the beginning and end of this edition that no one would have missed much.

 

[collinsmark]

Dos Equis is nice. Not sure I'd go so far as to rip pages out of a book just to hang on to the mere mention of it, though.

Maybe somebody really hates Dos Equis and feels compelled to annihilate all traces of its existence from the known universe?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Maybe somebody really hates Dos Equis and feels compelled to annihilate all traces of its existence from the known universe?

I think we can rule this out because, given the importance of the clue, the beverage in question is mentioned many more times in the rest of the book, which was intact.

 

[WWGD]

Sorry to keep bringing this up: Powerball jackpot hits $1,500,000,000 . I am sort of hoping no one wins, just to see the jackpot reaching 3-4 billion for next time. Of course, since sales of tickets are way up , it is necessary for a lot of repeats to happen .Wonder if it will be shown in large video screens.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Sorry to keep bringing this up: Powerball jackpot hits $1,500,000,000 . I am sort of hoping no one wins, just to see the jackpot reaching 3-4 billion for next time. Of course, since sales of tickets are way up , it is necessary for a lot of repeats to happen .Wonder if it will be shown in large video screens.

Someone just posted this on Facebook:

 

[WWGD]

Someone just posted this on Facebook:
View attachment 94240

They are either horrible at Math or misunderstood (misunderestimated?) the meaning of 1.5 billion. It comes down to $4.33 /person. Or a bit more than $1 per Chinese person. Or, EDIT: Maybe Andolini is Italian and was thinking of Liras. But not even then.

 

[Ibix]

They are either horrible at Math or misunderstood (misunderestimated?) the meaning of 1.5 billion. It comes down to $4.33 /person. Or a bit more than $1 per Chinese person.

Enough to buy a calculator for each person, you think?

 

[zoobyshoe]

They are either horrible at Math or misunderstood (misunderestimated?) the meaning of 1.5 billion. It comes down to $4.33 /person. Or a bit more than $1 per Chinese person. Or, EDIT: Maybe Andolini is Italian and was thinking of Liras. But not even then.

The original meme seems to have originated from an Instagram account named Esteyban, as Buzzfeed notes. Though the quote is attributed to a person named Philipe Andolini, Tech Insider could not find any such person after a quick internet search. Judging by Esteyban's other Instagrams, however, it's likely a made-up person the self-labeled "meme-creator" chose for his meme.

http://www.techinsider.io/powerball-split-math-meme-is-wrong-2016-1

 

[WWGD]

I finally got another copy of that book that had pages ripped out of it. Sometime later tonight I shall discover the secret of why they were suppressed, or alternately I will remain confused as to why they were torn out.

Just curious, have you asked library staff if this happens often?