Programs So you want to get a PhD in physics? The video

[eri]

OK, 'fess up. Which one of you made this?



I'm sending it around to the other grad students in my program.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

This is amazing!

 

[Math Is Hard]

Is the dialog from a PF thread? It sounds so familiar.

 

[kramer733]

oMFG THIS SOUNDS LIKE ALL FIRST POSTS. Like literally, it's the same thing.

 

[eri]

The one for the humanities is far more depressing.

 

[Phyisab****]

I'll never understand why doing a PhD in physics is synonymous with doing cosmology or string theory and then doing post docs for the rest of your life because you can't get a tenure track position.

 

[lisab]

That's so awesome.

 

[Pengwuino]

LAWLS "I'm 32 and I haven't seen my adviser in 3 years"

I'm sad now.

 

[Pengwuino]

LAWLS the "So you want to be a humanities PhD" is the funniest thing ever! These are all wonderful...

 

[DrummingAtom]

ROFL HAHAHAHHA!

 

[Cod]

Fantastic...absolutely fantastic!

 

[DR13]

That was GREAT! Everyone should have to watch this and the humanities one before joining PF.

 

[nonHermitian]

Fantastic video ! I'm also interested in string theory LOL

 

[twofish-quant]

Great video!

And the video was a little inaccurate about the number of jobs in academia. The good news is that there are more than five jobs available. The bad news is that the real number is around 15-20.

Here they all are..

http://cdm.berkeley.edu/doku.php?id=astrojobs10/

 

[twofish-quant]

I'll never understand why doing a PhD in physics is synonymous with doing cosmology or string theory and then doing post docs for the rest of your life because you can't get a tenure track position.

Doesn't matter much, because you'll be in post-doc hell regardless of what type of physics you go into.

The good news is that you won't be doing post-docs for the rest of your life. The bad news is that the reason you won't be doing post-docs for the rest of your life is that after the second one, you are not likely to get a third, and you certainly will not be getting a fourth. If you are totally desperate to stay in academia, then at that point you are teaching community college and making less money than a plumber.

 

[RepoMan]

Hilarious vid! As I was watching some of the sidebar links I found a funny Simpsons clip along the same lines, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XViCOAu6UC0&feature=related"

 

[Phyisab****]

Doesn't matter much, because you'll be in post-doc hell regardless of what type of physics you go into.

The good news is that you won't be doing post-docs for the rest of your life. The bad news is that the reason you won't be doing post-docs for the rest of your life is that after the second one, you are not likely to get a third, and you certainly will not be getting a fourth. If you are totally desperate to stay in academia, then at that point you are teaching community college and making less money than a plumber.

What I mean is that I personally know many successful physics PhD's who are employed in industry. I'm pretty sure most of them didn't do more than one post-doc, if that. Physics PhD's are very employable at high tech Fortune 500 companies. If I were to do a PhD it would be in hopes of getting a job like that, not with some pipe dream of being a professor at Princeton.

In my opinion, this video is attacking a strange, unrealistic perception of what a PhD in physics is for. It is funny only in the way it mocks the 15 year olds who routinely post here about how their dream is to study string theory.

 

[Mororvia]

In my opinion, this video is attacking a strange, unrealistic perception of what a PhD in physics is for. It is funny only in the way it mocks the 15 year olds who routinely post here about how their dream is to study string theory.

An unrealistic perception that a large number of posters in this sub-forum tend to have. In my opinion, its best to knock these folks down a little bit. Thats a whole other thread though...

I like the video! Made me giggle a bit. Now on to the humanities

 

[flyingpig]

Great video, EXCEPT WHY DOES THE WOMAN HAVE A MAN'S VOICE?

 

[Mathnomalous]

I think additional voices cost some $. There are a bunch of these types of videos on Youtube mocking different fields and professions.

So far, I have seen videos mocking economics, political science, theoretical computer science, film, law school, humanities, and business school.

 

[Math Is Hard]

Hilarious vid! As I was watching some of the sidebar links I found a funny Simpsons clip along the same lines, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XViCOAu6UC0&feature=related"

That's really good! Pengwuino needs to see this - especially the part about grading the 3000 papers!

 

[Philosopher_k]

Guys, i am going to stand up for the minority here and say wtf is wrong with going for your dream. Some of us might be talented enough to land a tenure track position in string theory/cosmology and so on. If i wanted a boring job i would become an accountant.

Are postdocs really that hard to get?

My dream is to get a bs (mathematical physics) masters (cambridge tripos part 3 with distinction) PHD (DAMTP), professorship princeton (Institute of Advanced study)... is it really that unrealistic?

 

[Caramon]

Guys, i am going to stand up for the minority here and say wtf is wrong with going for your dream. Some of us might be talented enough to land a tenure track position in string theory/cosmology and so on. If i wanted a boring job i would become an accountant.

Are postdocs really that hard to get?

My dream is to get a bs (mathematical physics) masters (cambridge tripos part 3 with distinction) PHD (DAMTP), professorship princeton (Institute of Advanced study)... is it really that unrealistic?

Yes, they really are that hard to get. The people who end up in String Theory/Cosmology research positions were thinking about black hole collisions when they were 4 years old.

Did you skip 3 grades and get 100% on every exam in Math/Physics you took in High School? Were you also a robohuman created at MIT during the 1990s so now you are old enough to start taking a degree at Harvard? If so then you will end up in the next generation of String Theory/Cosmology research positions.

 

[Philosopher_k]

Caramon. I don't care how hard i have to work. I am going down the string theory/ Cosmology track. I was not being serious about those exact goals, but i would enjoy some form of theoretical physics. I bet your just bitter because your some programming monkey.

 

[Philosopher_k]

Also take Leonard susskind for example. He started off as a plumber before going to engineering school and then changing to physics.

Or Edward Witten who was a history major at college.

You don't need to start at the age of 10 to contribute anything meaningful.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

He's just kidding around, Roger Penrose couldn't finish his Mathematics tests in elementary school and high school.

 

[Caramon]

No, I'm not some programming monkey. I'm currently taking a Bsc Honours in Astrophysics at the University of Alberta. I'm doing extremely hard courses (at least from my perspective, as I am currently an undergraduate idiot that has never done any real research) and I realize that despite having a 3.6 GPA having taken Upper-division topology, 6 astrophysics courses, A+ in all Calculus courses, etc. that I am still too damn retarded to be able to be a professor at Princeton or be a scientific researcher at CERN.

If I'm extremely lucky and end up getting up accepted into what I consider the top-tier graduate schools:
I'll be done going to caltech or penn state for 4 years on 3 hours of sleep a night. After which I've researched my life away to publish my dissertation in some "narrow-narrow subfield" that no body really cares about so I can hope to somehow get observing time at the Keck telescope or work at the VLT for the rest of my life while publishing the most "impressive" papers possible so that someone takes me seriously and gives me some real telescope time.

...which they won't.

But I'm willing to try, and you should too. Because I love this stuff, and you should too.

 

[D H]

My dream is to get a bs (mathematical physics) masters (cambridge tripos part 3 with distinction) PHD (DAMTP), professorship princeton (Institute of Advanced study)... is it really that unrealistic?

In a nutshell, yes. The odds are against you in many ways. You are in essence claiming that you are in the top 99.99999% or so of the population in terms of intelligence. I don't know you, so I might be wrong, but the odds are 9,999,999:1 against that you are not one in ten million type person in terms of intelligence, perspicacity, and persistence. Even if you are, the odds are still against you. There simply aren't that many tenured theoretical astrophysics chairs around.

There is nothing wrong with getting a lowly bachelors degree and getting a job in industry or the government. You can do better, of course. You can get an advanced degree and then get a job. If you do beat the odds add get a teaching or research position in academia with your PhD in physics, it will not be with Princeton. You will need get a postdoc, then prove yourself as assistant professor.

 

[Caramon]

I'm not trying to discourage you, I don't think anyone is. It's just... please realize you'll be in for a very very tough (and long) ride.

 

[Philosopher_k]

No, I'm not some programming monkey. I'm currently taking a Bsc Honours in Astrophysics at the University of Alberta. I'm doing extremely hard courses (at least from my perspective, as I am currently an undergraduate idiot that has never done any real research) and I realize that despite having a 3.6 GPA having taken Upper-division topology, 6 astrophysics courses, A+ in all Calculus courses, etc. that I am still too damn retarded to be able to be a professor at Princeton or be a scientific researcher at CERN.

If I'm extremely lucky and end up getting up accepted into what I consider the top-tier graduate schools:
I'll be done going to caltech or penn state for 4 years on 3 hours of sleep a night. After which I've researched my life away to publish my dissertation in some "narrow-narrow subfield" that no body really cares about so I can hope to somehow get observing time at the Keck telescope or work at the VLT for the rest of my life while publishing the most "impressive" papers possible so that someone takes me seriously and gives me some real telescope time.

...which they won't.

But I'm willing to try, and you should too. Because I love this stuff, and you should too.

I am sorry for being slightly condescending. But you never know you or i might be the guys that revolutinize 21st century physics! Even if as D H said the chances are against us, you never know. Your right about the love of the subject.

As for you D H. You will be eating your words when i work at the institute of advanced study with a fields medal around my neck

 

[Caramon]

We'll see who will be eating their words after you try and tackle in one semester with an A in each:
-Electromagnetic Theory II
-Statistical Mechanics II
-High Energy Astrophysics & Cosmology
-Quantum Mechanics II
-Mathematical Methods in Physics
-Introduction to History and Philosophy of Science

 

[Kevin_Axion]

That sounds so awesome! I honestly wouldn't care if I had to study twenty hours a day for those subjects. How is Alberta's physics program? I'm thinking about going to Waterloo as it's close to home and is pretty amazing for physics in general.

 

[Caramon]

Yeah, studying 10 to 12 hours a day is manageable if it's something you like and are really interested in... which I am. But 20 hours a day as you were saying I honestly had to do some weekends, it's not fun at all.

University of Alberta has a great Geophysics and Astrophysics program with Honours specializations, in general it is a top notch physics program. I wouldn't recommend University of Calgary, bad professors, high tuition, horrible campus, and huge class sizes. I purposely left Calgary (even though I grew up there) to come to Edmonton so I could go to University of Alberta, I'm really glad I did!

Waterloo is also excellent though, I would generally recommend UBC, University of Alberta, McGill, Waterloo, and Dalhousie. What are you planning on majoring in? Those courses I took were during my third year at the Honours Astrophysics program at University of Alberta.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

I'm looking at majoring with an Honours Physics degree. I'm not sure what I'll get into, I'm thinking about going into Condensed Matter Physics, or Astrophysics. I've always wanted to study string theory, LQG and the like but obviously these positions aren't as desired as the former list.

 

[Caramon]

Well, if you plan on studying any of those fields you better be prepared to go to Grad school! Any of the Universities I recommended would prepare you for attending an excellent graduate school in the states, or somewhere in Canada (U of T and UBC offer excellent astrophysics PhD programs).

EDIT: I forgot University of Western Ontario, they have an awesome program also where you can minor in planetary science!

 

[Kevin_Axion]

I'm not really interested in UWO, mostly for "social" reasons. I have a lot of time, I'm only 16. It's probably bad that I'm admitting this because I was just arguing with an undergraduate about the consequences of String Theory and now I appear ignorant.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

May I ask what your average was when applying to University?

 

[Caramon]

I had 99% in AP Math 31, 92% in Pure Math 30, 91% in Social 30, 88% in English 30, 94% in Physics 30, and 85% in Chemistry 30.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

I have an 86 in chemistry right now, I've gotten a 97 and 94 on the last two tests, it's the stupid labs that he marks so subjectively.

 

[Caramon]

That was my downfall with English and Social! I hate opinion-based marking. Just study harder and you'll be fine. I found High school harder in the sense that the environment sucked and the majority of the class is full of retards so it is really an impediment to your learning (not to be self-centered, but it's true).

The whole University environment really stimulates you to grow in intelligence and think more analytically and overall to just mature as a human being.

Sorry, my writing is horrible I've had no sleep.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

Yes, English... I could speak about the prose and poems of Shakespeare and the fallacies of human imagination, but what have I achieved. Merely a rendition of someone else's ideas. Not very original, is it?

 

[Caramon]

English Literature is a dead end, as these videos suggest! Haha.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

I have this problem, signs contain braille underneath the lettering, for instance, washrooms signs. Now I once asked someone, how does a blind person find the sign? They said they feel the walls. Do you have any idea, it's off topic but I'm so very bored.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

If the opposite of pro is con, then what is the opposite of progress?

 

[Caramon]

HAHAHA, that's a good one.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

It's the philosophy of a dinosaur, a raptor to be specific.

 

[Philosopher_k]

Lol us three should catch up some time in 20 years. See who actually made it where.

Ill tell you what i will host the get up at Princeton and even pay for your air fairs :)

 

[Kevin_Axion]

So what is it you want to do Philosopher_k? To be exact, what is it you want to study/research?

 

[Philosopher_k]

Mathematical physics/Cosmology or maybe even pure mathematics.

Don't take my posts about working at princeton seriously, i am nowhere near that good.

 

[Kevin_Axion]

Interesting, I'm debating between Condensed Matter Physics and High Energy Physics/Astrophysics but I have a long way to go.