rhuthwaite said:
The psychologist doesn't know what to do because she won't co-operate...
Perhaps ask another psychologist to see her? Psychologists should know that not every patient is going to cooperate, especially during an initial visit, and should be better prepared than the rest of us to deal with that. But, a lot of that is just the rapport that a psychologist can build with the patient, and sometimes one person can get through when another can't. Actually, she'd probably be better seeing a psychiatrist than a psychologist. If she's unable to cope at all on her own, she may need the assistance of medication to help her calm down in the short term until she can get ahold of herself to start coping.
However, you said this only happened "the other day." That sort of experience is going to be traumatic, and her reaction is not at all surprising. People react to trauma in a lot of different ways...denial, withdrawal, blaming others, blaming themselves, etc. How is her father doing? Since he shared the experience with her, he might be the only one who can talk to her about it at first.
Also, how is everyone acting toward her? People have a natural tendency to be concerned about a friend or family member going through something like that, and may be making a big fuss over her at a time when she would rather just try to get back to her normal routine as much as possible, so she might be withdrawing from the excessive attention. But I can only guess at that. She might also just be so scared to go back outside after such an experience that she's withdrawing to avoid that fear.
Do you know what her previous attitude was about psychologists or psychiatrists? You've seen the threads here about people who are suspicious of them and whether they can really do anything, so if she already held that bias against psychologists before this happened, or thinks they're only someone you see if you're totally crazy, then she's going to be more resistant to seeing one now. If she had a positive attitude about them in the past, but is now resisting seeing one, then it's more likely denial.
Is she at all religious? Many clergy have experience in counseling their parishioners through traumatic experiences, and she may be willing to talk to a trusted clergy member rather than a psychologist if she is religious.
If she'll only talk to you, then the next best thing is for you to see the psychologist and ask about strategies for helping her. Find out what kind of questions you should ask, or how you might direct her to cope, or if you should just listen quietly for a while, etc., or just to vent your own frustrations over bearing the weight of such a responsibility of helping your friend deal with such a serious event.
My gut feeling is to give her a few weeks to just let it all sink in and for her to come to grips with what happened on her own, and then if she still is in denial and not coping well, to revisit the idea of seeing a specialist. I would think most people think they don't need a psychologist to deal with their fear, and only if they really can't cope on their own is it necessary. So, if you give it a few weeks and she still isn't coping, she may be more willing to admit it isn't something she can just get over without help.
Edit: One last thought. You may have to just get firm with her and her family if this goes on more than a couple weeks and she's still refusing to seek professional help. Something very direct, like, "I really care about you, and I want to see you get over this, but I can't do it alone. I'd like you to see a psychiatrist/psychologist who can help you better than I can. If you want, I can go with you or take you there. I won't allow you to continue withdrawing or let you self-destruct over this."
