Collection of Lame Jokes

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SUMMARY

This forum discussion centers around a collection of lame jokes shared by users, showcasing a variety of humor styles. Notable jokes include, "A duck walks into a pharmacy and says, 'Give me some chapstick and put it on my bill,'" and "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." Participants engage in light-hearted banter, with some jokes eliciting groans and laughter alike. The thread emphasizes the enjoyment of humor that is intentionally silly or absurd, appealing to those who appreciate puns and wordplay.

PREREQUISITES
  • Understanding of basic joke structure and humor types
  • Familiarity with puns and wordplay
  • Knowledge of cultural references in humor
  • Ability to appreciate absurdity in comedic contexts
NEXT STEPS
  • Explore the history of puns in literature and comedy
  • Research the psychology of humor and why people enjoy lame jokes
  • Learn about different styles of comedy, including surrealism and absurdism
  • Investigate the role of cultural references in joke-telling
USEFUL FOR

Anyone looking to enhance their comedic repertoire, including aspiring comedians, writers, and individuals interested in the mechanics of humor. This discussion is particularly beneficial for those who enjoy light-hearted, silly jokes and want to understand their appeal.

  • #4,861
Ibix said:
I doubt this, projecting from the number of things I still seem to learn the hard way in my forties...
just wait for another 20 - 30 yrs :wink::wink:
 
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  • #4,862
davenn said:
just wait for another 20 - 30 yrs :wink::wink:
...then I'll find out the hard way that I'm wrong? :angel:
 
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  • #4,863
New PF feature (with AI , I guess) : every post of mine that remotely resembles a joke is automatically moved to this forum. Just to save time.
 
  • #4,864
WWGD said:
New PF feature (with AI , I guess) : every post of mine that remotely resembles a joke is automatically moved to this forum. Just to save time.
AI? No way, far too many false positive results :biggrin:
 
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  • #4,865
Massless particles travel at light speed.
Particles with mass at heavy speed.
 
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  • #4,866
A guy walks into a ski lodge, accompanied by a pony on skis.

Desk clerk: "Uh, what's up with your friend?"
Guy: "Him? The cold made him a little hoarse. "
 
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  • #4,867
Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.
 
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  • #4,868
Things you don't hear or say in Balloon World:
At the fast food joint - You want a pop with that?
At school - Today we are having a pop quiz.
Meeting you dad - Hi Pop!
 
  • #4,869
Why did the chicken cross the road?

In some frames of reference the road crossed the chicken.

(The Einstein Reverse - a distant relative of the "in Soviet Russia, chicken crosses you" gag).
 
  • #4,870
A neutrino walked through a bar.
 
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  • #4,871
Ibix said:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
I know a similar one:
Why the chicken didn't cross the road?!
Too many cars and because it's "chicken"! ...
 
  • #4,872
Who was harder to get long with: Euler or Lagrange?

Euler, Lagrange just went with the flow.

(made this joke up when studying for my quals)
 
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  • #4,873
fresh_42 said:
A neutrino walked through a bar.
So what!?
[if only it was just one ...]
 
  • #4,874
fresh_42 said:
A neutrino walked through a bar.
And told himself: Let's split through the slit (Please pardon tech details, my Physics is pretty rudimentary. EDIT I know it is supposed to be electron, but you take whatever you can get.).
 
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  • #4,875
Two pilots p1,p2 trying to land a plane.
P1: We're not going to make it, landingbstrip is too short.
P2: Yes, but it is so wide...
 
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  • #4,876
BBQ 1988: Where's the beer?
BBQ 2018: What's your WLAN password?
 
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  • #4,877
"Darling, I'm back! I bought grapes."
"Don't they sell this instant-wine anymore?"
 
  • #4,878
fresh_42 said:
BBQ 2018: What's your WLAN password?
My response: What's your MAC address?
 
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  • #4,879
Two guys are ice fishing, sitting at adjacent holes in the ice. Guy #1 isn't having much luck, but guy #2 is pulling in one fish after another.

Guy #1: OK, what's your secret?
Guy #2: Mmmp mmmr mmmrms mmmrm.
Guy #1: Eh what?
Guy #2: [Turns and spits.] Keep your worms warm.
 
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  • #4,880
Guy is out ice fishing with his son. He opens a can of peas and begins laying them on the ice all around the hole. His son asks why?

"When a fish comes up to take a pea, we get him".

With apologies to Garrison Keilor
 
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  • #4,881
That reminds me of a really lame one.

Why did the beauty contestant put peas in a blender?
Because she wanted whirled peas.
 
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  • #4,882
Peas were one of the few things my son would reliably eat when he was little. He was happily scoffing a plate of them the day he was a year and a half old, so I explained to a friend that it was his eighteen month birthday and we were out on the peas.
 
  • #4,883
Why copper sulfate is blue? that’s because there is water in it’s molecules.
but why is the heart blue? That’s because I am.
 
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  • #4,884
Two teenagers comparing their dads.
Teen1 :My dad's a hero
Teen2: He's not a hero, he's a nut.
Teen1 He's a hero, he stormed the beach at Normandy.
Teen2: He's a nut, he did last week. Alone.
 
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  • #4,885
Young physicist said:
The cat is outdated!
Schrödinger's phone:
View attachment 230144
You can't tell if the screen is intacted or not until you pick it upo_O
I like the phone better. The cat never made sense anyway ... The phone does!
 
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  • #4,886
How many pairs of animals are there on Moses’ ark?

None.’cause Moses has no ark.
 
  • #4,887
Young physicist said:
How many pairs of animals are there on Moses’ ark?

None.’cause Moses has no ark.
That's not true. Moses's ark is the ark of the 10 commandments:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ark_of_the_Covenant

Now, pairs of animals though? Nope
 
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  • #4,888
It was soooo cold outside...

that hitchhikers held up photos of their thumbs.
 
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  • #4,889
jtbell said:
It was soooo cold outside...

that hitchhikers held up photos of their thumbs.
:thumbup:
 
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  • #4,890
jtbell said:
It was soooo cold outside...

that hitchhikers held up photos of their thumbs.
I start to combine this joke with the fact that the Russians in a town I once visited used a different signal, the one we usually use for "Please slow down! Danger ahead." If it was linked to the average temperature?
 

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