Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #8,801
Stavros Kiri said:
Most of the time I find the google animations are ..meh.. This one I did like.
 
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Physics news on Phys.org
  • #8,802
jkjf.png
 
  • #8,803
1608707111685.png

What in the tarnation would be a gunpowder farm? ?:)
 
  • #8,804
Apparently it's a Minecraft thing.
 
  • #8,805
256bits said:
View attachment 274940
What in the tarnation would be a gunpowder farm? ?:)
Minecraft.

A lot of things you can build in Minecraft require specific resources. Some you can mine, some you can make from raw materials, and some you have to hunt animals to obtain. Gunpowder comes from hunting creepers, a kind of creature which has a tendency to sneak up on you and explode. Hunting them is time consuming and dangerous. But there are ways to exploit the game mechanics to build farms, semi-automated farms, or even fully-automated farms for some creatures. Then you can sit back and let the resources roll in. Gunpowder is useful for building rockets, so you can fly around the world, and TNT (yeah, chemistry is a bit odd in Minecraft), which is useful for mining and for defence against other players.
 
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  • #8,806
Dumpster fire, brought to you by the year 2020

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  • #8,807
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  • #8,808
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  • #8,809
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  • #8,813
Competitive fishing must be a really cut-throat sport. I asked a contest-winner I know what the secret to his success is, and he replied, "If I told you, I'd have to gill you."
 
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  • #8,814
I vaguely remember reading some Tom Swift novels in my youth but I don't remember any of these "Tom Swifties". Some of them took me a moment to get.

I've had my left and right ventricles removed, said Tom, halfheartedly.
My hair's been cut off, said Tom, distressfully.
Where did you get this meat, asked Tom, hoarsely.
You dropped a stick, Tom needled.
Blow on the fire so it doesn't go out, Tom bellowed.
I can't believe we lost the election by only two votes, Tom recounted.
I'm losing my hair, Tom bawled.
Thanks for shredding the cheese, said Tom, gratefully.
I've located the Dog Star, said Tom, seriously.
You look like a goat, Tom kidded.
I used to own that gold mine, Tom exclaimed.
No thanks to that Frenchman, said Tom, mercilessly.
You're not a real magician at all, said Tom, disillusioned.
I've never had a car accident, said Tom, recklessly.

and my favorite:

That's the last time I'll pet a lion, said Tom, offhandedly.
 
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  • #8,815
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  • #8,817
wrobel said:
View attachment 274541

TEXT: your excrement is our joy

(some Slavic language I don't know exactly which one)
Google Translate identifies the language as Croatian but without an English translation.
 
  • #8,818
phinds said:
and my favorite:

That's the last time I'll pet a lion, said Tom, offhandedly.

My favorite:
"I dropped my toothpaste," said Tom, crestfallen.
 
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  • #8,819
You really don't want to go down that path. They just get worse and worse.

"Ein, zwei, drei, fünf," said Tom fearlessly.
 
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  • #8,820
Vanadium 50 said:
My favorite:
"I dropped my toothpaste," said Tom, crestfallen.
"And I don't have another" Tom added aimlessly.
 
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  • #8,821
The three hardest things for a guy to say are:
I was wrong
I need help
Worcestershire Sauce​
 
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  • #8,822
2CEDCBD6-46D3-47E5-A78C-1B2DA448DF8A.jpeg
 
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  • #8,823
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  • #8,824
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  • #8,825
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  • #8,827
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  • #8,828
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  • #8,829
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  • #8,830
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  • #8,831
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  • #8,833
A specialist is someone who increasingly knows more and more about less and less until they know everything about nothing.
 
  • #8,834
Well-timed pic:
main-qimg-4108020141b52f1660f2a4fb04a50891.jpeg
 
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  • #8,835
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  • #8,836
main-qimg-3a287675ec4d777e461de7cdc162e9b0.jpeg
 
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  • #8,837
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  • #8,838
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  • #8,839
Have you seen the new Covid-themed calendar for 2021? Every day of the week is Blursday.
 
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  • #8,840
Everyone knows who Karl Marx was.
Yet we fail to recall his sister ONYA, inventor of the starter pistol.
 
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  • #8,841
davenn said:
Everyone knows who Karl Marx was.
Yes, his grave is a communist plot.
 
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  • #8,842
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  • #8,843
I went to the zoo the other day, and they had a baguette in a cage. The sign said it was bread in captivity.
 
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  • #8,845
2Finger_of_God%22_Bok_globule_in_the_Carina_Nebula.jpg
 
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  • #8,846
As I'm sitting here watching TV waiting for the ball to drop in Times Square, I had a too-late idea. They really should have stuck red spikes all over the ball. Then when it reaches the bottom of the pole at midnight, they could blow it up!
 
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  • #8,848
stevendaryl said:
A woman was at a graveside, mourning her recently deceased husband, when a man came up and cleared his throat. "May I say a word?" he asked. She nodded. "Plethora" he said. She nodded and replied: "Thanks. That means a lot."
Another man asked if he could say a word, and again the widow nodded. "Bargain", he said. "Thank you," she replied. "That means a great deal."
 
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  • #8,849
Ibix said:
Another man asked if he could say a word, and again the widow nodded. "Bargain", he said. "Thank you," she replied. "That means a great deal."
However, another person said "zero" and she said "that means nothing to me".
 
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  • #8,850
And another one said "Loan shark."
She said " Thank you. That means I will always be in your debt."
 
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