Collection of Lame Jokes

  • Thread starter Thread starter quddusaliquddus
  • Start date Start date
  • Tags Tags
    Jokes
Click For Summary

Discussion Overview

The thread centers around sharing and enjoying lame jokes, with participants contributing various humorous quips and puns. The discussion explores the nature of humor, particularly focusing on jokes that are intentionally corny or groan-inducing.

Discussion Character

  • Exploratory
  • Debate/contested
  • Conceptual clarification

Main Points Raised

  • Some participants share their favorite lame jokes, such as the classic "Why did the chicken cross the road?" and variations on animal-related humor.
  • Others express differing opinions on the quality of certain jokes, with some finding them hilarious while others consider them unfunny or "lame." For example, one participant finds a specific horse joke funny, while another insists it doesn't qualify as lame.
  • A few jokes incorporate wordplay and puns, such as the "frayed knot" joke and the "super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis" joke, which elicit mixed reactions.
  • There are discussions about surreal humor, with some participants questioning the nature of certain jokes and their classification as humor, such as the "fish" response to a lightbulb question.
  • Participants also engage in playful banter about the quality of jokes and the nature of humor itself, with some joking about the reactions to their contributions.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

There is no clear consensus on what constitutes a "lame" joke, as participants express a range of opinions on the humor shared. Some jokes are appreciated by certain individuals while others find them lacking, indicating a diversity of taste in humor.

Contextual Notes

Some jokes rely on specific cultural references or wordplay that may not be universally understood, leading to varied interpretations among participants.

  • #5,851
strangerep said:
About 2 secs -- it's easier if you say them aloud. :oldbiggrin:
Me too, about 2 secs. or less (referring to the "Pigs sell late " 'toon)
strangerep said:
Other way around for me. Liquid oxygen? LO? LO2? LOx... oh I get it...
Oy veh...
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: Steelwolf
Physics news on Phys.org
  • #5,852
I was considering a career as a psychic, but I just didn't see a future in it
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: *now*, Steelwolf and Ibix
  • #5,853
dad help.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: Keith_McClary, DrClaude, strangerep and 8 others
  • #5,854
I had to return my "U2" navigation system...
I couldn't find what I was looking for, and none of the streets had any names.​
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: DrClaude, *now*, Mark44 and 3 others
  • #5,855
davenn said:
I was considering a career as a psychic, but I just didn't see a future in it

I bet you knew I was thinking of replying "I knew you'd say that", though.
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: *now*, Steelwolf and davenn
  • #5,856
I had always thought it would be cool to run a Psychic Pizza Delivery service. Some one calls in for a Large Double Pepperoni Pizza and the person answering picks up the phone with : " Hello Mr Jones, Your Large Size Double Pepperoni pizza is on it's way it should be" Ding Dong (doorbell) "There right now, that will be twenty seven fifty, and the delivery boy thanks you for the $7.50 tip, Have a great day and we will see you again June 18th!"
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: *now* and Ibix
  • #5,857
Steelwolf said:
I had always thought it would be cool to run a Psychic Pizza Delivery service.
I think this is on the list of "things that get you thrown off the Jedi Council", after "using your lightsaber to open beer" and "<hand gesture> I gave you a twenty". If not, it should be.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: Steelwolf
  • #5,858
Instant delivery is a great advantage over other pizza services.
 
  • #5,859
I was going to tell a lame joke about paper, but I realized it was terrible.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: Steelwolf
  • #5,860
davenn said:
I was considering a career as a psychic, but I just didn't see a future in it

I was knocking at the door of a psychic.
He shouted: "Who's there?"
I turned away and left.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: davenn, Ibix, *now* and 3 others
  • #5,861
245165
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: davenn, *now* and Steelwolf
  • #5,862
Even more? Is one third the surface of Earth not enough?
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: *now*, Steelwolf and Ibix
  • #5,863
mfb said:
Even more? Is one third the surface of Earth not enough?
He's being pacific-aggressive.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: davenn, *now*, Steelwolf and 1 other person
  • #5,864
27108608_n.jpg?_nc_cat=105&_nc_ht=scontent.fmuc3-1.jpg
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: Keith_McClary, davenn, *now* and 1 other person
  • #5,865
Sure does.
I wish I had checked the oil level before driving on vacation.
I wish I had a jug of oil in the trunk.
I wish I wasn't a hundred miles from nowhere.
:H
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: Keith_McClary, Wrichik Basu, mfb and 4 others
  • #5,866
fresh_42 said:
Q: Why do cows have hooves?

A: Because they lactose.
Reminds me
Why do humming birds hum?

Cuz they don't know the words.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: davenn, *now* and Ibix
  • #5,867
Why should you never tell secrets on a farm?

Because corn has ears, potatoes have eyes, and beanstalk.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: jtbell, davenn, *now* and 2 others
  • #5,868
Here's one
If your nose runs and your feet smell, you're built upside down.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: davenn, *now*, jack action and 1 other person
  • #5,869
Why do elephants paint their feet yellow?

So they can hide upside down in custard.
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: davenn, Klystron, *now* and 1 other person
  • #5,870
Grim Reaper.jpg
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: Ibix, Steelwolf and 256bits
  • #5,871
Ibix said:
Why do elephants paint their feet yellow?
So they can hide upside down in custard.
Oh jeez, that takes me back to my childhood. What an ancient joke.

Of similar vintage:

Why do elephants paint their toes red?

So they can't be seen when they're hiding in a strawberry patch. o0)

More recent:

What did the female elephant say to the naked man?

Well,... I guess it's kinda cute,... but can you actually breathe through that??
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: 256bits, davenn and Steelwolf
  • #5,872
strangerep said:
What did the female elephant say to the naked man?
I know it as: "And with that you want to eat?"
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: Steelwolf
  • #5,873
strangerep said:
Why do elephants paint their toes red?

So they can't be seen when they're hiding in a strawberry patch. o0)
Have you ever seen an elephant in strawberry patch?

No? Then that shows how effective it is.
By the way, in the version I heard as a child, it wasn't a strawberry patch, it was a cherry tree.
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: Keith_McClary, davenn, strangerep and 1 other person
  • #5,875
Birth control?

02162176_n.jpg?_nc_cat=107&_nc_ht=scontent.fham1-1.jpg
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: davenn
  • #5,876
63553024_n.jpg?_nc_cat=110&_nc_ht=scontent.fham1-1.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: nuuskur, davenn, jtbell and 2 others
  • #5,877
Did you know phones like to take cellfies?

F1E5EDA6-19AB-4D6A-8723-C201F7872525.jpeg
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: collinsmark, davenn, strangerep and 1 other person
  • #5,878
  • #5,879
People that don't have the confidence to take a picture of themselves in a sauna...
most likely have selfie steam issues...
 
  • Like
Likes   Reactions: jack action, Borg and Ibix
  • #5,880
809100288_n.jpg?_nc_cat=101&_nc_ht=scontent-syd2-1.jpg
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes   Reactions: collinsmark, nuuskur, jack action and 6 others

Similar threads

  • · Replies 470 ·
16
Replies
470
Views
36K
  • · Replies 10 ·
Replies
10
Views
976
  • · Replies 2 ·
Replies
2
Views
2K
  • · Replies 4 ·
Replies
4
Views
2K
  • · Replies 4 ·
Replies
4
Views
5K
Replies
2
Views
4K
  • · Replies 17 ·
Replies
17
Views
5K
  • · Replies 420 ·
15
Replies
420
Views
43K
  • · Replies 7 ·
Replies
7
Views
2K
  • · Replies 15 ·
Replies
15
Views
2K