Collection of Lame Jokes

[WWGD]

Is the population of Egypt growing?

I don't think so, they seems to be the same height as last time.

 

[WWGD]

Diarrhea is hereditary.
How so?
It runs in your jeans!

 

[256bits]

That is so bad!
Through word association, it made me think about stool pigeons. What do they eat for lunch?

 

[WWGD]

1: Describe yourself to us.
2: My father's name is laughing, my mother's name is smiling.
1: You're kidding.
2: No, he's my brother. I'm joking.

 

[WWGD]

I couldn't find the Italian chef at the corner restaurant.
It seems he pasta way.

 

[WWGD]

Akward recent text exchange:

--I'm here for you
__ Thank you, I am going through difficult times. I Just need someone to believe in me.
__Sorry, I don't recognize your number. Who are you?
--I'm your UBER, I am outside waiting for you.

 

[davenn]

How do planets get clean?

With a meteor shower!

 

[WWGD]

In the Senegal to France car rally people ride dakar all the way to Paris.

 

[fresh_42]

That one took me an entire minute ...

 

[Wrichik Basu]

Did Canada run out of names for streets?

 

[WWGD]

I wanted to create a belt made of clocks but I realized it would be a waist of time...

 

[jbriggs444]

I wanted to create a belt made of clocks but I realized it would be a waist of time...

Maybe you need an Ehrenvest?

 

[gmax137]

Did Canada run out of names for streets?

How about Metairie, Louisiana

 

[mfb]

Hickory Ave and Dickory Ave run parallel for nearly 2 km south of this map section.

How can Steamship circle have an end? It's a "C"-shaped road, not a circle.

That reminds me: "closed" starts with an open shape, but "open" starts with a closed shape.

 

[davenn]

haha

 

[Ibix]

I like drinking brake fluid, and I drink it all day every day. My wife says I'm addicted, but I can stop anytime.

 

[davenn]

I was just looking at my ceiling...

Not sure if it's the best ceiling in the world, but it's definitely up there.

 

[fresh_42]

I was just looking at my ceiling...

Not sure if it's the best ceiling in the world, but it's definitely up there.

I will borrow that for a joke elsewhere which isn't allowed here.

 

[WWGD]

Dr Kevorkian, the Euthanasia doctor, was an accomplished pianist. He even put out an album: "Jack Kevorkian, Unplugged".

 

[davenn]

I was outbid by 10cents for a settee on ebay.

So close, yet sofa.

 

[jim mcnamara]

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from a linear algebra class student, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

 

[BillTre]

Well, that's a stretch.

 

[DrGreg]

Rulers and compasses were banned as weapons of maths construction.

(But it turned out there weren't any.)

 

[mfb]

It has been claimed that the Al-Gebra network has been terrorizing students.

 

[WWGD]

Talking to the Texan waiter who forgot my dessert order:
"Remember the A la Mode".

 

[WWGD]

Maybe we could ask Greg if he can extend the "Unwatch" function for threads to some recent movies I went to. Yech.

 

[Klystron]

Maybe we could ask Greg if he can extend the "Unwatch" function for threads to some recent movies I went to. Yech.

If I see one more serial killer movie, I'll kill ... well, something.

 

[Ibix]

Why are leopards bad at hide and seek?

They're always spotted.

 

[davenn]

 

[Borg]

One day, my wife and I were walking past a car that had just been pulled over. We walked past just in time to hear the driver tell the cop "I'm in a hurry". I'm betting that didn't go well.