Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #18,701
Baluncore said:
Yes, but they hide if you look.
That's what they want you to think.
 
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  • #18,702
Baluncore said:
Yes, but they hide if you look.
Borg said:
That's what they want you to think.
I don't trust either of you.
 
  • #18,703
Paranoia.JPG
 
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Likes WWGD, Bystander, jtbell and 1 other person
  • #18,704
Screenshot 2024-04-05 at 10.08.53 AM.png
 
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Likes DrClaude, DennisN, collinsmark and 4 others
  • #18,705
An avocadomorph? :DD
 
  • #18,706
Screenshot_20240404_165409_Samsung Internet.jpg
 
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Likes DennisN and Bystander
  • #18,707
Screenshot_20240404_170941_Samsung Internet.jpg
 
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Likes Wrichik Basu, pinball1970, DennisN and 2 others
  • #18,708
The latest report on the earthquake in NY this morning:
1712365100930.png
 
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Likes WWGD, pinball1970, DrClaude and 4 others
  • #18,709
I sent that exact same joke when my sister asked if I felt the quake.
 
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Likes DennisN, BillTre and nsaspook
  • #18,710
1712366800970.png
 
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Likes pinball1970, Ibix, DennisN and 4 others
  • #18,711
1712367196730.png
 
  • #18,713
1712416267583.png
 
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Likes pinball1970, nuuskur, Ibix and 5 others
  • #18,714
1000049572.jpg
 
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Likes Wrichik Basu, pinball1970, nuuskur and 3 others
  • #18,715
With an infinite number of monkeys typing on an infinite number of computers, in very short order the stench in the room would be just god-awful.
 
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Likes WWGD, DennisN and nsaspook
  • #18,716
IMG_0456.jpeg
 
  • #18,718
WWGD said:
If anyone wonders why cats do these things: they rub themselves against things to leave their scent and claim ownership of it.

One of my cats has done it lately with my tablet when I'm reading it in bed. She does it so intensely that she sometimes have closed apps when rubbing against the screen. She also has a habit of biting on the usb cable :smile:.
 
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Likes DrClaude and WWGD
  • #18,719
Hangover.jpg
 
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Likes nuuskur, Ibix, WWGD and 1 other person
  • #18,720
nsaspook said:
I don't always encrypt my messages.

But when I do, hVysYYlLbPX7dpU3phVA.
 
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Likes jack action, DennisN, WWGD and 1 other person
  • #18,721
Ibix said:
hVysYYlLbPX7dpU3phVA.
That's easy for you to say...
 
  • #18,722
DennisN said:
If anyone wonders why cats do these things: they rub themselves against things to leave their scent and claim ownership of it.

One of my cats has done it lately with my tablet when I'm reading it in bed. She does it so intensely that she sometimes have closed apps when rubbing against the screen. She also has a habit of biting on the usb cable :smile:.
I used to just pee around a seat in coffee shops , to mark it as mine, reserved. But, go figure, it seems " It's not acceptable ".
 
  • #18,724
dextercioby said:
I do actually, somewhere, have a bottle of deionised water that says "do not dilute" on the label.
 
  • #18,725
WWGD said:
I used to just pee around a seat in coffee shops , to mark it as mine, reserved. But, go figure, it seems " It's not acceptable ".
:oldlaugh:
 
  • #18,726
1712531629404.jpeg
 
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  • #18,727
  • #18,728
dextercioby said:
I hear there are cans of unionized water certified by the AFL-CIO.
 
  • #18,730
IMG_4422.jpeg
 
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Likes Wrichik Basu, pinball1970, nuuskur and 12 others
  • #18,731
1712593218864.png
 
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  • #18,732
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  • #18,733
Orodruin said:
Wait a minute! Where is the top of the lower Oreo?!?!
Invisible against the glare from the cream. Honest.
 
  • #18,734
1712602513832.png
 
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Likes davenn, DennisN, dextercioby and 3 others
  • #18,737
you might need special glasses for this one

1712629186005.png
 
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Likes pinball1970, nuuskur, davenn and 2 others
  • #18,738
Are those … E-clips? 😱
 
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Likes DennisN and BillTre
  • #18,739
phinds said:
you might need special glasses for this one

View attachment 343029
Can NOT believe how long it took me....
 
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  • #18,740
Bystander said:
Can NOT believe how long it took me....
About 4 minutes?
 
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  • #18,741
Orodruin said:
About 4 minutes?
Yes, four longer than should have been necessary...maybe I'll mention it at my next phlebotomy.
 
  • #18,743
Screenshot 2024-04-09 at 10.35.01 AM.png
 
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Likes davenn, DennisN and berkeman
  • #18,745
A lawyer was cross-examining the doctor about whether or not he had checked the pulse of the deceased before he signed the death certificate.
"No," the doctor said. "I did not check his pulse."
"And did you listen for a heartbeat?" asked the lawyer.
"No I did not," the doctor said.
"So," said the lawyer, "when you signed the death certificate, you had not taken steps to make sure he was dead."
The doctor said, "Well, let me put it this way.
The man's brain was in a jar on my desk but, for all I know, he could be out practicing law somewhere."
 
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  • #18,746
1712751784291.png
 
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Likes davenn, BillTre, collinsmark and 1 other person
  • #18,747
1712757602600.jpeg
 
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Likes davenn, BillTre, collinsmark and 2 others
  • #18,748
Printed on the door of the Linguistics Dept hallway:

1712757860086.png
 
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  • #18,749
BugCycle.jpg
 
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Likes pinball1970, davenn, BillTre and 3 others
  • #18,750
Ah, the circle of life.
1712758118520.png
 
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Likes davenn, BillTre and DennisN

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