Collection of Lame Jokes

[WWGD]

Hahahahah!

Oh, wait...

It's definitely funnier than t5rng- m91d -76qw-jpeg.652189.

 

[phinds]

 

[phinds]

 

[Keith_McClary]

Via @ohwilleke blog.

 

[fresh_42]

Via @ohwilleke blog.

Would you mind me moving it to Science Jokes?

Edit: Solved. I copied it. We have so many duplicates, one more doesn't matter.

 

[WWGD]

Would you mind me moving it to Science Jokes?

Edit: Solved. I copied it. We have so many duplicates, one more doesn't matter.

How certain are you? Give an estimate.

 

[fresh_42]

How certain are you? Give an estimate.

The variance would be too high.

 

[WWGD]

The variance would be too high.

That's an interesting issue. There is always a random sample guaranteed to fall outside of the confidence interval. You may test your hypothesis of average population height being 69' or 175 cm and just happen to randomly select all members of a basketball team .

 

[fresh_42]

I would first take the $p$-th of the total amount of posts as an estimation of posts that do not discuss other posts or are otherwise off-topic. Then I would count the number of repetition reports on the last $M$ pages and assume a tail-heavy distribution $f(X)$ of those reports per page. Then I would calculate the expectation value of repetitions per page to estimate the number of actual repetitions again with an assumption that the $q$-th part of repetitions were unreported.

So $p\, , \,q\, , \,M\, , \,f$ all would be prone to more or less deliberate choices, all changing the variance of my estimation of repetitions. And the parallel thread probably needs other parameters for its calculation.

And with such a model I would still neglect the number of posts occurring in both which is positive due to my previous copy action.

 

[kuruman]

$\dots~~$or are otherwise off-topic $\dots$

Ahem, is post ##11,439 off topic or is it a lame joke?

 

[WWGD]

Ahem, is post ##11,439 off topic or is it a lame joke?

It's undecidable. WWKD: What Would Kurt Do? ( A relative of mine, BTW ;) ).

 

[fresh_42]

Ahem, is post ##11,439 off topic or is it a lame joke?

Depends. It is a lame joke. Except for stochastics. For them, it is a lame joke.

 

[WWGD]

Depends. It is a lame joke. Except for stochastics. For them, it is a lame joke.

Stochastic, Syntactic, Bombastic, Fantastic (Shaggy).

 

[WWGD]

 

[jack action]

View attachment 293968

There is worst, the parent could have agreed with the toddler:

​

 

[BillTre]

 

[BillTre]

 

[WWGD]

 

[phinds]

View attachment 293987

Actally, that's a picture of me when I ask for a coke and the waitress asks if Pepsi would be OK.

 

[WWGD]

Actally, that's a picture of me when I ask for a coke and the waitress asks if Pepsi would be OK.

That's me everyday before getting my caffeine; ).

 

[fresh_42]

That was me on Thursday when they told me at two different McDoofs: Until 10 only breakfast.

 

[WWGD]

That was me on Thursday when they told me at two different McDoofs: Until 10 only breakfast.

There was a scene along those lines in the movie " Falling Down"* with Michael Douglas. His character, at 11:01 am being told breakfast is served only until 11. Edit: And a somewhat different scenario to the song " Institutionalized": ' All I wanted was a Pepsi..."

*Not that you can fall up, though.

 

[jack action]

I met some chess enthusiasts in a hotel lobby recently. They just kept bragging about how good they are at the game.

There's nothing worse than chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

 

[fresh_42]

I met some chess enthusiasts in a hotel lobby recently. They just kept bragging about how good they are at the game.

There's nothing worse than chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

That's when you wish Capablanca was around:

After Alekhine had taken the championship title from Capablanca, Capa spent quite a bit of his spare time hanging out in a specific cafe in Paris. Friends, acquaintances, and others would often drop by, participating in games and libations with the former, charismatic, champion. One day, while Capa was having coffee and reading a newspaper, a stranger stopped at his table, motioned at the chess set, and indicated he would like to play if Capa was interested. Capa's face lit up, he folded the newspaper away, reached for the board, and proceeded to pocket his own queen. The opponent (who apparently had no idea who Capablanca was) reacted with slight anger. "Hey! You don't know me!", he said. Capa's answer: "Indeed!"

 

[jtbell]

The Scottish mutation of coronavirus.

View attachment 293733

Besides the other well-known effects of the coronavirus, this one also destroys your hearing.

 

[WWGD]

That's when you wish Capablanca was around:

After Alekhine had taken the championship title from Capablanca, Capa spent quite a bit of his spare time hanging out in a specific cafe in Paris. Friends, acquaintances, and others would often drop by, participating in games and libations with the former, charismatic, champion. One day, while Capa was having coffee and reading a newspaper, a stranger stopped at his table, motioned at the chess set, and indicated he would like to play if Capa was interested. Capa's face lit up, he folded the newspaper away, reached for the board, and proceeded to pocket his own queen. The opponent (who apparently had no idea who Capablanca was) reacted with slight anger. "Hey! You don't know me!", he said. Capa's answer: "Indeed!"

At the Capa Cabana.

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[fresh_42]

At the Capa Cabana.

I have heard the story with Alekhine in the title role. Makes more sense.

 

[strangerep]

That's when you wish Capablanca was around:

After Alekhine had taken the championship title from Capablanca, Capa spent quite a bit of his spare time hanging out in a specific cafe in Paris. Friends, acquaintances, and others would often drop by, participating in games and libations with the former, charismatic, champion. One day, while Capa was having coffee and reading a newspaper, a stranger stopped at his table, motioned at the chess set, and indicated he would like to play if Capa was interested. Capa's face lit up, he folded the newspaper away, reached for the board, and proceeded to pocket his own queen. The opponent (who apparently had no idea who Capablanca was) reacted with slight anger. "Hey! You don't know me!", he said. Capa's answer: "Indeed!"

I too have read versions of such stories, which went as follows...

Alekhine was once on a train, analyzing positions on a miniature chess set. A stranger noticed and offered to play a game. Alekhine said he'd play the man for a stake of 100 pounds ( a lot of money in those days).
"What?" the stranger said. "You don't even know me!".
"That", said Alekhine, "is why."

For contrast, Capablanca was such a gentleman that when a stranger offered to play him, giving queen odds, Capa thought it rude to refuse. He quickly won the game, then offered the stranger the same odds, again winning.

There's a quote by Paul Morphy (paraphrased): "The ability to play chess is a sign of a good upbringing. The ability to play chess well is a sign of a misspent life". I wish I'd realized that when I was teenage example of the truism that within every chess player of reasonable skill lurks a nutcase.