Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #19,151
When you just want to play your guitar but your dad is that guy from Pink Floyd

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Physics news on Phys.org
  • #19,152
When you just want to go out but that guy from Pink Floyd plans a concert

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  • #19,153
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  • #19,154
 
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  • #19,155
Woodworking humor:

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  • #19,156
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  • #19,157
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  • #19,158
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  • #19,160
topsquark said:
...and one in each coat, one in each backpack...

Oh! That was for my migraines. Sorry!

-Dan
Seems I'm not the only one who has ibu and asa within reach. :cool:
 
  • #19,161
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  • #19,162
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  • #19,163
ohc=OwgH9scV_-0Q7kNvgGqZzuU&_nc_ht=scontent-fra5-1.jpg
 
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  • #19,164
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  • #19,165
Ibix said:
If you can do it, it reflects badly on you
.ʇɥƃᴉɹ ǝɹɐ noʎ pᴉɐɹⅎɐ ɯ╻I
 
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  • #19,167
fresh_42 said:
.ʇɥƃᴉɹ ǝɹɐ noʎ pᴉɐɹⅎɐ ɯ╻I
My mother, a second grade school teacher, developed the useful skill of reading children's handwriting upside-down.

[My useless skill is reciting the alphabet backward]
 
  • #19,168
jbriggs444 said:
[My useless skill is reciting the alphabet backward]
I dunno, it might be pretty amusing during DUI tests... :wink:
 
  • #19,169
berkeman said:
I dunno, it might be pretty amusing during DUI tests... :wink:
I used to be able to do that and had the opportunity to use it that way once. No, I wasn't drunk.
 
  • #19,170
Borg said:
I used to be able to do that and had the opportunity to use it that way once. No, I wasn't drunk.
LOL. How did the officer take it? :smile:
 
  • #19,171
I had been asked to recite the alphabet and screwed it up because I had been practicing it backwards. When I messed up, he asked if I had been drinking and I explained that I had been practicing it in reverse. He then asked me to do it that way, I got it right and he sent me on my way.
 
  • #19,172
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  • #19,173
fresh_42 said:
.ʇɥƃᴉɹ ǝɹɐ noʎ pᴉɐɹⅎɐ ɯ╻I
¡ǝʅʅᴉꟽ ǝᴉzɐɹ⅁

¡sʞɹoʍ ʅʅᴉʇs ʞʍɐɥɹǝʌoH ɹoʇɐʅnɔʅɐϽ uoᴉɥsnϽ ɹᴉ∀ ʇⅎɐɹɔɹǝʌoH ǝɥꓕ .snoᴉɹǝs uɐɥʇ ʎuunⅎ ǝɹoɯ ʎʅʅɐnʇɔɐ ʇnq ǝnʅɐʌ ʅɐɔᴉuɥɔǝʇ ⅎo ʎʅʅɐɯɹoⅎ ǝɹɐ ʇɐɥʇ sʞuᴉʅ uᴉ pǝʇsǝɹǝʇuᴉ osʅɐ ɯ╻I ʍou ʇɥƃᴉɹ pɐǝɹ puɐ ǝǝs uɐɔ noʎ s∀ .ʍouʞ ǝɯ ʇǝʅ ǝsɐǝʅd ʻsɹoʇɐʅnɔʅɐɔ ǝuᴉʅuo ⅎo ʇsᴉʅ ʎɯ oʇ pǝppɐ ǝq uɐɔ ʇɐɥʇ spunodɯoɔ ʅɐɔᴉɯǝɥɔ ɹo sƃoʅɐʇɐɔ ʅɐɔᴉƃoʅoᴉq .ƃ.ǝ ʻsǝƃɐdqǝʍ - ɔᴉⅎᴉʇuǝᴉɔs ʎʅqɐɹǝⅎǝɹd - ʎuɐ ʍouʞ noʎ ⅎI .pǝʞoʌoɹdun ʎʅƃuᴉɯǝǝs ʇsǝnbǝɹ ʎɯ puǝs oʇ ǝʌɐɥ I os ǝsɐɔ ǝɥʇ ʇ╻usɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ʻʎʅǝʇɐunʇɹoⅎuՈ .pǝʞsɐ ǝʌɐɥ pʅnoʍ ǝuoǝɯos ʇɐɥʇ pǝdoɥ I ʻʅʅǝϺ

Last time upside down, I promise. Thanks for reading!

Well, I hoped that someone would have asked. Unfortunately, this wasn't the case so I have to send my request seemingly unprovoked. If you know any - preferably scientific - webpages, e.g. biological catalogs or chemical compounds that can be added to my list of online calculators, please let me know. As you can see and read right now I'm also interested in links that are formally of technical value but actually more funny than serious. The Hovercraft Air Cushion Calculator Hoverhawk still works!

Grazie Mille!
 
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  • #19,174
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  • #19,175
More cowball!

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  • #19,176
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  • #19,178
An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
'Before you tell that joke I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'
The blind Marine thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'
 
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  • #19,179
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  • #19,180
fresh_42 said:
Cow Lottery:

View attachment 346256
The winner depends on where the cow patties land, right?
 
  • #19,181
jtbell said:
The winner depends on where the cow patties land, right?
Yep.
 
  • #19,182
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  • #19,184
dextercioby said:
It is good to see the AI got the CAPTCHA wrong.
(e3TJ6JdP vs the correct e3TJ6Jdp)
 
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  • #19,185
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  • #19,186
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  • #19,188
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  • #19,189
davenn said:
I just love how they are blocking a stopped escalator. Imagine someone having to use their legs to move themselves! Especially if they are in a hurry to go to the gym to use one of these:

Climber.gif?width=600&height=600&name=StairClimber.gif
 
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  • #19,190
Screenshot 2024-06-02 at 10.38.35 AM.png
 
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  • #19,191
The only thing flat-Earthers fear is sphere itself.
 
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  • #19,192
When I'm explaining AI biases to people, I often use the analogy of ChatGPT telling a flat-Earther that the Earth is round and how they might perceive it as being biased against their beliefs. There's always a bias of some sort - whether it's an AI or a person.
 
  • #19,193
A room temperature superconductor (RTSC) walks into a bar.
The bartender says "we don't serve RTSCs in this bar."
The RTSC turns around and walks away, without showing any resistance.
 
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  • #19,195
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  • #19,196
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  • #19,197
Screenshot_20240430_172613_YouTube.jpg
 
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  • #19,198
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  • #19,199
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  • #19,200
From Google Maps.

This_That_and_The_Other_Street.jpg
 
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